The Official: I blankity-blank HATE spiders!!!! (+1 picture)

Shit-damn-fuck... I hate spiders.

Details; I decided to quit being lazy after HOURS AND HOURS of playing Battlefield Bad Company 2 (xbox360 gamertag: arizonad54) and go for a walk, well, right when I walk out the front door... BAM, a fucking spider web right in my face. I hate that shit. I spent the rest of my walk trying to remove the bits and pieces of web that kept tickling my face. Really no big deal but really annoying.

Fast forward to 15 minutes ago. Time for a late dinner (aka cereal). Unlike other crazies out there, I drop my cereal in the bowl before the milk... (this is how it's properly done ladies and gentlemen!!) ... and right when I'm pouring my raisin bran in, a spider bails from wherever the fuck it was hiding in my hair and on to my cereal. Still annoyed from the web in the face deal, and even more pissed that my cereal was now FUCKED with nasty spider sperm, cooties, eggs, I scooped the spider + cereal in my hand and tossed it in the microwave. Pushed "Popcorn" and sent that pussy ass spider to hell!

For those who will end up PMing me - the spider did not explode, it ran around for awhile and then just simmered and collapsed. AMERICA, fuck yeah!

Thank you for your time, that is all.

Pics for those who need some LOLing;




Feel free to relate or post stories.

 

Lol I hate spiders too... and black widow's fucking love my garage.

 

Say what?

 

Gratz on your kill! You should have that baby stuffed and mounted!

 

I got all the satisfaction I needed/wanted. I pulled it out of there, dropped it in the toilet and then pissed on it.

 

Well you handled it better than chris4x4. His house would have been burned down if a spider fell out of his hair and into the cereal.

 

you showed that spider who's in charge huh

 

im a fan of spiders(dont like when im walking to my deer stand early am and run into a web tho....them effin spiders are huge)..................check this one out.......he was in my well house a while back.....

 

Chris4x4 taking care of a spider in his home.

 

That thing is HUGE! I'd be afraid to step on him in fear he might eat my foot. Might have to try and shoot that one.

 

just think....that aint that good of a pic of him.......was was as big as a whole brick is deep.....his legs were on the brick above and below where his body is.

 

FTMFW

 

FUCK THAT SHIT

 

I remember Chris said he sprayed a spider with 3M spray adhesive and it is still on the wall in his shop as a warning to other spiders.

 

One night im hlaf asleep in bed and I had a tickle on my chest, figured it was just the sheet so I readjusted and proceded to doze back off. Right before I fall asleep I feel the same thing, so I readjust (I am half asleep so I didnt think too much about it) and try to get back asleep. Then I feel something moving across my chest. So I proceded to jump from a laying position to about 5 feet away from the bed to the light switch and turn it on. I then find a big ass wolf spider laying on my pillow. I go to attempt to assassinate the spider with a ninja attack and it sees me and goes in between the bed and wall. I tore apart my bed to kill that spider, then grabbed a blanket (From the closet) and slept on the couch.

 

thanks.. u just ruined my sleep tonight.

 

I dont mind spiders, just as long as they arent on me. That just creeps me out

 

LOL!! just think of all the eggs it laid in your hair while you were on your walk. J/K it probably didn't