Originally Posted by Rudbwoy7s
dont forget to shoot the guy in the face.
So how did you catch the guy who did it?
Kind of funny, here's the story:
I live in an apartment complex and rent an itty bitty garage. The road is narrow enough that I have to swing wide, back up, and then head into the garage.
Sunday night, some guy decided there was no parking, so he parked next to the curb on the other side of the road, directly in the spot that prevents me from angling into the garage. Not only is it not a parking spot, but it's got one of those nice red curbs that lets smarter people know that it's reserved for firemen who would plow you in the event of an emergency.
I try doing the nice thing and knock on doors... couldn't find the owner. Called the tow truck company, who said they couldn't do anything without the apartment complex's authority. Called the apartment complex:
"We can't do anything until morning"
"They are in a fire lane. The tow company just needs an authorization code."
"Sorry, we can't do anything"
"I'll be contacting management"
This is the time I remembered I had a tow strap... but thought I better not. Damn tempting though. Decided to pull the only other Ace card I had - called the police nonemergency dispatch, who came out to collect a nice tidy revenue.
Unfortunately, I was still without a garage, and now without a spot. There was one compact parking that would have given a quad trouble. I could roll up into the grass, or take my chances with one of the reserved, covered spots. Some of those aren't being rented and just remain empty, so I decided it's 1am already, people are home, might as well take one and just get up real early.
Woke up and jumped outside at 6:30am. Just about ready to get in the truck and BAM, noticed a pink piece of paper and a bunch of egg on the windshield. After waking up the neighbors with my yelling, I start thinking - the spot is reserved in someone's name, and the note has a phone number!!
Back on the horn with the police. They will bring a car by to check it out. I call the insurance in the meantime. Standard fare, but this piece just struck me:
"Sir, do you know who egged your car?"
"Well, the vehicle is parked in a reserved spot and the guy left his phone"
"Sir, we don't know if that could be related or if it was someone else"
(WTF? "I'm going to choose the one day to egg cars where I can find a pink sign and avoid all the other cars... RIIIIIGHT)
Cops show up, and we go through the motions. Yes, I want to press charges - if the person had just left their phone number, I would have taken them to dinner! I don't want to have to do this, but this is no excuse! My neighbor walks up, who happens to be the unofficial patriarch of the apartment complex - he knows EVERYONE there, very extroverted, you get the picture. "Oh lord officer, I know the man, but I'm surprised he would do this. I will slap him myself once I see him." I'm somewhat entertained watching how the cop tries to do his job while my neighbor talks about how he's going to discipline a grown man.
Cop leaves, my neighbor and I go wash the truck. The egger was thankfully pretty bad at vandalism - he only hit the windshield. Makes me wonder if he was hesitant to do the deed or there was a large part of the conscience holding him back. Just about everything washed off, but the egg managed to drip down from the windshield into the venting. Panic starts to set in, so like some action figure I jump on it with wild judo tiger skill.
I head straight to the dealer to get it detailed, but the dealer wants to wait until the afternoon, 4 hours away. That doesn't jive with Action Mike. I call up a local detailer, and he says, "let's get it in NOW". That sounds like a whole lot more action.
I give the Detailer the scoop, and he starts working. It's about 11am now, so He gives me a coupon for a sub shop down the street, and I happily go eat the first meal I have time for that day.
I get back, and the detailer says it's been a good success of hosing out the vent area. There's one area of cabin venting that Toyota makes that is apparently ridiculous to clean, and thankfully the egg completely missed it. Turning on the fan will still make the cabin smell a tiny bit, but should go away. If it doesn't I should come back in.
Got back, sprayed the truck down again, then went to have a talk with the apartment staff.
Apparently, they can't tow anyone for 72 hours. I think they probably are full of it when it comes to fire lanes. They decide to give me some credit on my bill and move me to a much nicer garage that doesn't have any place for people to park around it and block me. Woot.
We talk about some of the other issues as well, and I leave.
My neighbor sees me walking back and motions me over. Apparently he was telling the truth earlier in the morning, and went to chew out Egg Man. Before he could say anything, Egg Man spills his guts. "I've been so foolish, I want to apologize but I don't know what to do!" My neighbor gives him a sermon and sets him straight. Fast forwarding back to now, I find a written apology, and my neighbor asks me to take a few minutes to consider forgiving (Egg Man) in person.
I wasn't planning on this, and had to think. The man was wrong to do what he did. I am completely justified to take him to court, to send him to jail. However...
Every week, there's a building I go to. There's many words I say, and many things I feel strongly about. I do things that hold great meaning to me, and help me be a better man. Among many things I do, I say aloud, "forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive those who trespass against us."
I go to Egg Man's house with my neighbor, and Egg Man apologizes deeply. It's probably the strangest sight you will see - a man who's almost half a head taller than me, built like he was bred to wrestle gorillas - begging me for a second chance and forgiveness.
There's some stern words from my neighbor and me, but I forgive Egg Man. Egg Man promptly demands to pay any of my bills and states that the three of us must go to dinner on him.
Egg Man and I are now becoming friends. He drives one of the most flat-out beautiful Tundras you will ever see (I had to forgive him now - a fellow Toyota truck driver!), and he's got some info on where to find some really good deals on parts.
What's more, is that he's offering to be my personal trainer. He is getting me a discount at the gym, will show me what workouts I need to do, and so on. I have metabolic syndrome, so he's basically saving my life.
At the insurance company's request, I went to take the truck in to have the insurance guy assess the damage yesterday.
"So what happened to your vehicle?"
"It got egged"
"Are you sure?"
It's been between 90 to 111 degrees this week, and the truck's been parked in the sun for 3 days since the incident. I can't see any damage. I can't smell any eggs either. I think things are in the clear.
The incredible edible egg, huh?