Mike "Wuzzy121". Rest in peace, brother

Go Back   Tacoma World Forums > Off-Topic > Military

Notices

INTERNATIONAL ALERTS TO TERROR THREATS IN 2011

Reply
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread
Old 04-23-2011, 06:58 AM   #1
MT Madman [OP] MT Madman is offline
Senior Citizen
MT Madman has a brilliant futureMT Madman has a brilliant futureMT Madman has a brilliant futureMT Madman has a brilliant futureMT Madman has a brilliant futureMT Madman has a brilliant futureMT Madman has a brilliant futureMT Madman has a brilliant futureMT Madman has a brilliant futureMT Madman has a brilliant futureMT Madman has a brilliant future
 
MT Madman's Avatar
Air Force: Telecomm Tech
Joined: Feb 2010, #30831
Location: St. Louis area
Age: 58
Gender: Male
Posts: 415
MT Madman's Tacoma Gallery
INTERNATIONAL ALERTS TO TERROR THREATS IN 2011

By John Cleese - British writer, actor and tall person

The English are feeling the pinch in relation to recent terrorist threats and have therefore raised their security level from "Miffed" to "Peeved." Soon, though, security levels may be raised yet again to "Irritated" or even "A Bit Cross."

The English have not been "A Bit Cross" since the blitz in 1940 when tea supplies nearly ran out. Terrorists have been re-categorized from "Tiresome" to "A Bloody Nuisance." The last time the British issued a "Bloody Nuisance" warning level was in 1588, when threatened by the Spanish Armada.


The Scots have raised their threat level from "Pissed Off" to "Let's get the
Bastards." They don't have any other levels. This is the reason they have
been used on the front line of the British army for the last 300 years.


The French government announced yesterday that it has raised its terror alert level from "Run" to "Hide." The only two higher levels in France are "Collaborate" and "Surrender." The rise was precipitated by a recent fire that destroyed France's white flag factory, effectively paralyzing the country's military capability.


Italy
has increased the alert level from "Shout Loudly and Excitedly" to"Elaborate Military Posturing." Two more levels remain: "Ineffective Combat Operations" and "Change Sides."

The Germans have increased their alert state from "Disdainful Arrogance" to "Dress in Uniform and Sing Marching Songs." They also have two higher levels: "Invade a Neighbor" and "Lose."


Belgians, on the other hand, are all on holiday as usual; the only threat they are worried about is NATO pulling out of Brussels.


The Spanish are all excited to see their new submarines ready to deploy. These beautifully designed subs have glass bottoms so the new Spanish navy can get a really good look at the old Spanish navy.


Australia
, meanwhile, has raised its security level from "No worries" to"She'll be alright, Mate." Two more escalation levels remain: "Crikey!I think we'll need to cancel the barbie this weekend!" and "The barbie is canceled." So far no situation has ever warranted use of the final escalation level.
  Reply With Quote
Old 04-23-2011, 06:23 PM   #2
Molon Labe
CoalMedic is one of the sharper tools in the shedCoalMedic is one of the sharper tools in the shedCoalMedic is one of the sharper tools in the shedCoalMedic is one of the sharper tools in the shedCoalMedic is one of the sharper tools in the shedCoalMedic is one of the sharper tools in the shedCoalMedic is one of the sharper tools in the shedCoalMedic is one of the sharper tools in the shedCoalMedic is one of the sharper tools in the shedCoalMedic is one of the sharper tools in the shedCoalMedic is one of the sharper tools in the shed
 
CoalMedic's Avatar
Marines: now Paramedic/Firefighter
Joined: Jan 2011, #48994
Location: Southern Illinois
Gender: Dude
Posts: 386
CoalMedic's Tacoma Gallery
Classic.
  Reply With Quote
Old 06-02-2011, 08:11 PM   #3
You can't fight in here! This is the War Room!
scocar is one of the sharper tools in the shedscocar is one of the sharper tools in the shedscocar is one of the sharper tools in the shedscocar is one of the sharper tools in the shedscocar is one of the sharper tools in the shedscocar is one of the sharper tools in the shedscocar is one of the sharper tools in the shedscocar is one of the sharper tools in the shedscocar is one of the sharper tools in the shedscocar is one of the sharper tools in the shedscocar is one of the sharper tools in the shed
 
scocar's Avatar
Name: Scott
Joined: Nov 2009, #25814
Location: In close proximity to an undisclosed location
Gender: Dude
Posts: 18,461
scocar's Tacoma Gallery
Damn, it has already been posted! Apparently it was making the rounds again. As the son of immigrant parents (English) and fan of all things Pythonian and Cleesian, I approve.
  Reply With Quote
Old 06-02-2011, 11:01 PM   #5
You can't fight in here! This is the War Room!
scocar is one of the sharper tools in the shedscocar is one of the sharper tools in the shedscocar is one of the sharper tools in the shedscocar is one of the sharper tools in the shedscocar is one of the sharper tools in the shedscocar is one of the sharper tools in the shedscocar is one of the sharper tools in the shedscocar is one of the sharper tools in the shedscocar is one of the sharper tools in the shedscocar is one of the sharper tools in the shedscocar is one of the sharper tools in the shed
 
scocar's Avatar
Name: Scott
Joined: Nov 2009, #25814
Location: In close proximity to an undisclosed location
Gender: Dude
Posts: 18,461
scocar's Tacoma Gallery
Quote:
Originally Posted by OZ-T View Post
Tell em we already got wan
You've already got one? Show it to us!
  Reply With Quote
Old 06-03-2011, 02:33 PM   #6
BELT FED 2OZ. PULL
river rat 69 is one of the sharper tools in the shedriver rat 69 is one of the sharper tools in the shedriver rat 69 is one of the sharper tools in the shedriver rat 69 is one of the sharper tools in the shedriver rat 69 is one of the sharper tools in the shedriver rat 69 is one of the sharper tools in the shedriver rat 69 is one of the sharper tools in the shedriver rat 69 is one of the sharper tools in the shedriver rat 69 is one of the sharper tools in the shedriver rat 69 is one of the sharper tools in the shedriver rat 69 is one of the sharper tools in the shed
 
river rat 69's Avatar
Navy: River Boats,Mike's & PBR'S Viet-Nam 68&69
Name: Jim
Joined: Dec 2010, #47249
Location: Orlando, Fla., Green side of the grass
Gender: Dude
Posts: 14,781
river rat 69's Tacoma Gallery
Quote:
Originally Posted by scocar View Post
Damn, it has already been posted! Apparently it was making the rounds again. As the son of immigrant parents (English) and fan of all things Pythonian and Cleesian, I approve.
x 10
  Reply With Quote
Reply

Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Alerts on your Cell phone? James3492 Off-Topic Discussion 3 06-28-2010 03:41 PM
Airport scanner: Can U spot the threats? Zombie Runner Off-Topic Discussion 8 04-08-2010 12:01 PM
Bad Business Alerts 400lbGorilla 2nd Gen. Tacomas 2 02-25-2010 01:39 PM
communicating threats law fireturk41 Off-Topic Discussion 5 01-10-2010 10:43 AM
New Terror Alert Colors!!! Pster Off-Topic Discussion 3 09-15-2009 05:38 PM


Copyright © 2014 Tacoma Forum. Tacoma World is not owned by, or affiliated with Toyota Motor Corporation.