I just got back from Afghanistan last month and I'm just having some problems adjusting. This was not my first deployment, it was actually my fourth but this time has been the toughest for me to get my head back into the civilian world. I left with a girlfriend of 8 years who lived with me and that didn't work out since I wasn't the best of boyfriends while I was gone. She's been through a couple deployments before with me but it's tough on her because I tend to take the stress out on her at times when I am gone. So I understand her leaving and needing to get away. We had a good run and deep down I hope we have another run at it someday. So now I find myself alone with way too much time on my hands to think about things.
Anyway, so I have that going on which adds to the stress of trying to readjust. I know I need to get out of the house and do things to get my mind on life and away from the deployment and my ex. But, for the life of me I can't bring myself to leave the damn house. I've become like a hermit. I don't even get my mail until it's like 3am and even then I have to drag myself out to do it. My friends want to hang out and stuff but I really just have no desire so I make up excuses. I really just don't know how to get out of this slump. She was kind of always the one who would get me to go out and do things and live a little. Now without her here, I just find myself trying to relive the deployment and not leave the house if that makes any sense at all.
My friends try and I feel like a total douche for not wanting to do things with them but the few times I have hung out since I've been back, all I wanted to do the whole time was go home. I guess I'm just looking for a little insight from some other vets who might have had the same problem.