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Old 06-15-2012, 04:44 PM   #1
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marriage gifts

My son is getting married. My wife wants to give them about 2 grand for their wedding gift. We are not rich but could muster it up but I am old school and am thinking more in the realm of 500.00 bucks which I feel is very very generous. So the discussion is is she more in align with gifts from parents to their kids or, am I.. I think my dad gave me 50 bucks when I got married 25 years ago. But my family is tight so what side are you in?
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Old 06-15-2012, 04:48 PM   #2
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im with you man. my brother is getting married in a few months and i guarantee you my folks aren't dropping that kind of coin on a present . . . i honestly think your $500 neighborhood figure sounds just right if not a little generous.
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Old 06-15-2012, 05:09 PM   #4
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If you can swing 2 grand why not? I know I would want to give my kids the best possible especially since you aren't paying for wedding! 2 grand is better then 5 or 10. And if you still don't feel right just settle with your wife and make it a 1000.
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Old 06-15-2012, 05:25 PM   #6
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I think you're going to get all different answers from different parts of the country. My parents gave us $2,500 when my wife and I got married two years ago.
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Old 06-15-2012, 05:25 PM   #7
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When my daughter got married we did the wedding ourselfs and still spent over 20,000 plus we paided for the honeymoon........and the best part they only stayed married 6 months then we had to pay for the big D(on the web 500 bucks).
$500-1000 would be good. When my son gets married this year he will get $1000
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Old 06-15-2012, 05:31 PM   #8
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Quote:
Originally Posted by tacomatrd99 View Post
I think you're going to get all different answers from different parts of the country. My parents gave us $2,500 when my wife and I got married two years ago.
I think this is possibly true (about a variety of responses), so take everything with a grain of salt...

I'm pretty sure my parents gave me like $250 as a gift, and my (now ex) wife's parents gifted about the same. It was my first marriage, her second, and her father also paid for the pastor (married on the beach, so no need for a church and such) I'd say that $500 is quite generous...
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Old 06-15-2012, 05:35 PM   #9
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Quote:
Originally Posted by detnight View Post
When my daughter got married we did the wedding ourselfs and still spent over 20,000 plus we paided for the honeymoon........and the best part they only stayed married 6 months then we had to pay for the big D(on the web 500 bucks).
$500-1000 would be good. When my son gets married this year he will get $1000
Holy ehh chit
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Old 06-15-2012, 05:45 PM   #10
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My folks paid for the photographer at our wedding as our "gift" & covered the costs of the rehearsal dinner as traditional wedding etiquette dictates. My in-laws paid for the majority of the ceremony/reception and what not.
Seems like 500 is plenty but I would think it'll take more than a TW thread to convince your wife and come to an agreement about it.
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Old 06-15-2012, 06:29 PM   #11
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Brunes View Post
My folks paid for the photographer at our wedding as our "gift" & covered the costs of the rehearsal dinner as traditional wedding etiquette dictates. My in-laws paid for the majority of the ceremony/reception and what not.
Seems like 500 is plenty but I would think it'll take more than a TW thread to convince your wife and come to an agreement about it.
Even better...
+1 for reading my mind.
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Old 06-15-2012, 06:36 PM   #13
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If my son get married i will buy him a new Tacoma...just saying...

Seriously, when I got married my inlaws paid for most of the reception and my parents for all the food and flowers, so we told them that we did not want anything else. It depends on circumstances. In OP's case I would say settle on $1000.
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Old 06-15-2012, 06:38 PM   #14
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My buddy got a grand from his grand parent, and they are RICH. $500 is plenty.

Don't sweat it. If you're going to have to muster up the coin to get the amount, the gift is going to mean more to you than it is to them which is a bad mentality. You can easily become resentful especially if they piss it away, so stick to the $500.
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Old 06-15-2012, 06:41 PM   #15
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$500 is a great gift regardless of how deep anyones pockets are IMHO
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Old 06-15-2012, 06:53 PM   #16
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My oldest son we gave them $5 K to put toward the wedding, then we had to fly ourselves our other son and his gf at the time from California to Texas, plus hotels. After that I think we gave them $500. as a gift.
When my other son got married last year we paid for the wedding, about $20 k. We then gave them about the same, $500. as a gift.
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Old 06-16-2012, 05:35 AM   #17
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Quote:
Originally Posted by detnight View Post
When my daughter got married we did the wedding ourselfs and still spent over 20,000 plus we paided for the honeymoon........and the best part they only stayed married 6 months then we had to pay for the big D(on the web 500 bucks).
$500-1000 would be good. When my son gets married this year he will get $1000

20 grand for a wedding? My daughter will be next to get married...
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Old 06-16-2012, 05:58 AM   #18
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Quote:
Originally Posted by coffeesnob View Post
20 grand for a wedding? My daughter will be next to get married...

No, not 20 grand...

... he said over 20 grand!




Which is correct, our wedding was approx. 26k, and then the honeymoon on top of that.

OP, I would not go above your means, whatever that would be. If you are not paying for the wedding at all, go for it, offer to pay for the honeymoon even it if it already covered, you could say this money is to cover ther expenses. I'm sure they will be thrilled with whatever they get, if not, they don't deserve anything.

Just like some eluded to, there may be a chance that divroce can be in the future (I know no one likes to admit that), so what about a smaller gift now and then possibly helping them out down the line, maybe some money for a house or another big expense?
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Old 06-16-2012, 06:04 AM   #20
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If hes your only child and you can afford it, why not. If you have 10 kids your setting precedent. But whats really important here is keeping Mom happy. Weddings are an emotional thing for women and we will never understand all the baggage that goes along with that and being the Mother of the groom. The brides family is footing most of the bill so don't be a cheapskate. Your getting off easy.
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