Somebody shit on my yard... what now?

make a giant, giant sign and put it in your yard

"DID YOU SHIT ON MY LAWN?
NO SHITTING ON MY LAWN

THAT SHIT AINT COOL, YOU EAT TOO MUCH CORN"

 

" WHO TOOK THE HUGE SUNFLOWER ON MY LAWN ? "

 

My plan...

 

If you haven't picked it up by now and your still sitting on the computer there is a problem.

 

I would take a nasty shit on their front porch and leave a note with a "Fuck You" in it.

 

Take a Shit as close to dead center as possible on the hood of the suspects car.

 

This is another good option lol

 

I mean if you know your neighbors did it. I say eat a bunch of spicy food drink a bunch of beer and let one out on the porch dry docking it on the front door.

 

Mix it with some hamburger and invite them over for a BBQ.

 

I know somebody who did that on a guys windshield. The victim in this situation got into his civic, and decided too turn the windshield wipers on in order to get rid of it. Smeared the shit all over his window.

I suppose he deserves it for driving a civic.

 

oh no this is a good idea. Just make you different burgers remembering not to confuse which one has the shit in it.

 

I mean you had to question it with the wtf..... Soooo, yeah I did.

 

If they really hate you, they'll be back..

1)Make sure they see you pick it up whilst grumbling and cursing under your breath.

2)Set bear trap.

3)Stake bear trap

4)Listen for the "yowzzaaaa!!!!" after they reach the end of the chain

 

I'm sure it was just some drunk passing by that couldn't hold their mud any longer and dropped a load behind your bush and hauled a$$.

 

A drunk passing buy that just happened too have a bunch of kleenex's in his pocket to use as toilet paper?

 

Probably the only thing they had to wipe their ass with. How do you know they were walking, may have been driving, caught the bubble guts and had to go.LOL Look at it another way, if it was your neighbor crapping in your yard, dont you think they would have brought toilet paper instead of kleenex.

 

I'm a tad concerned you know that "Someone" ( human) shat in your yard, being able to discern over Human and animal fecal matter is well, disturbing....

 

i once shit in someones fire pit when walking along the beach.

was a few miles from a restroom and didnt feel like pooping in sand.

 

Ever seen a dog or cat wipe it's ass with Kleenex ?