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What would you do?

Discussion in 'Off-Topic Discussion' started by JRFugitt, Feb 3, 2015.

  1. Feb 3, 2015 at 3:30 AM
    #1
    JRFugitt

    JRFugitt [OP] Well-Known Member

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    So, I have this co-worker that has become one of my best friends. He is old enough to be my grandpa and kind of adopted my family and I because he doesn't have one. He has given me what I think is a consideral amount of money,(he makes about three times what I do) so I can get caught up on bills after a bad year two years ago. He says he sees potential in me and wants to help get all this weight off my shoulders so it can come out. He doesn't want anything in return nor is he worried about me paying him back. No one has ever done anything like this for me before so my question is, how do I accept this gift? If you were him what would you want in return? I just don't want to miss use it in his eyes and him regret it. I know they say no one gets anywhere without help and anyone that is somewhere has had help at some time but gosh it almost makes me feel bad to accept it. Any words of wisdom? Thanks TW
     
  2. Feb 3, 2015 at 3:57 AM
    #2
    Ngotoma

    Ngotoma Well-Known Member

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    This is my opinion:

    If you tried turning it down once or twice, I wouldn't try any further or else it would an insult. He may see potential in you and as you said he had kinda adopted you and wants to see you succeed. Take it as a gift or sign of a higher power, fate, or whichever religion you wish to choose and use it wisely. I would half the bills, and half in savings. Just never forget where it came from and to be sure to do a similar act when your older and settled.

    Good luck in your decision.
     
  3. Feb 3, 2015 at 3:58 AM
    #3
    Large

    Large Red

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    Take the money, be grateful and pay him back when you can.
     
  4. Feb 3, 2015 at 4:08 AM
    #4
    T@co_Pr3runn3r

    T@co_Pr3runn3r XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

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    Always gotta be leary of people's motives nowadays for safety's sake but there really are some people out there that are in the right place in their heart and mind. Maybe it just is what it is. As harsh as it sounds, it is hard to take someone at their word without any skepticism with all the twisted shit that goes on any more. As soon as you let your guard down bad things usually happen. That being said, take the care, concern & faith in you this person sees as an opportunity to better yourself on multiple levels and pay it forward in the future somehow to someone else in need.
     
  5. Feb 3, 2015 at 4:11 AM
    #5
    Speedytech7

    Speedytech7 Toyota Cult Ombudsman

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    I'm from a "lower to mid" middle class household and for the longest time I lived next to perhaps the nicest family ever to walk the Earth. These people have always been super generous to both me and my family in our times of lesser fortune and in our times of prosper. Helping us out in whatever way may have been needed and offering to take me on various trips and fun outings. They have become my second family. I partially understand the situation you are in having received many opportunities for fun and help that I could never fully pay back (nor would they have accepted, trust me I've tried). I have always just done little things; bringing them food, thank you letters, being courteous and thankful.

    I would suggest that if your generous individual is insistent upon helping you, it is fine to accept after making sure they really want to go through with it. I believe while this person may not want anything in return they would certainly be happy for the occasional thank you or little gift, something to show that you are still grateful. It is always nice to have someone that sees something in you, lets you know you are doing something right. :)
     
  6. Feb 3, 2015 at 5:09 AM
    #6
    Battle Pope

    Battle Pope Christ-a-licious

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    accept the help, be grateful and use it wisely. When you get in a better financial standing do the same for someone who is in the situation you were once in.
     
  7. Feb 3, 2015 at 6:00 AM
    #7
    JRFugitt

    JRFugitt [OP] Well-Known Member

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    Thanks for the responses, I think it's amazing that you can get advice on anything from trucks, bar b que recipes, guns and personal advice on a truck forum! I've been a member of several but none compare to Tacoma World. He is a good person with no hidden motives, I just think he regrets not having a family and I let him be a part of ours. He always tries to help but I wont ever tell him what I need to accomplish a task. It's just been apparent lately that I have like a get up and do it block because of too many things that needs to be done. I just let a "number" slip one day after we got done shooting. I think I will open a savings account and give him the number so he can check in on it as I pay it back. I'm already trying to pay it forward to my 19 month old son, little sucker has more money than my wife and I combined! But yes I have never had a problem helping someone that truly deserves it and never will. It's just nice to know there are still some great people out there.
     
  8. Feb 3, 2015 at 6:05 AM
    #8
    JRFugitt

    JRFugitt [OP] Well-Known Member

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    He's the kind of guy that when he wants a new gun he buy's two, one for him and one for me to true up. When he wants me to tune a load for him he buys an 8 pound keg instead of a 1 pounder. Gosh and bullets, we both could supply half the town!
     
  9. Feb 8, 2015 at 9:11 PM
    #9
    G.T.

    G.T. Official TW Burrito Inspector

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    Know a guy a couple streets down that is in a similar situation, no family and a nice nest egg with very few hobbies or outside interests to spend it on. Decided to help a neighbor that needed a hand. After the initial back and forth the recipient asked for financial guidance from his new benefactor and learned allot which he has since put to good use. Some of us were not graced with someone well versed in the financial world who was willing to take a knee and set us straight, so if you meet a kind soul like your friend who is willing to help, odds are they can and will share that knowledge with you as well.
     
  10. Feb 9, 2015 at 2:33 AM
    #10
    coffeesnob

    coffeesnob Well-Known Member

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    I believe this man giving the money will be blessed in some fashion. Take the money use it to pay off bills and consider it a blessing yourself to be out of debt. If you insist on not taking it PM me and I will give you a paypal account number where he can bless me with it.
     
  11. Feb 9, 2015 at 6:21 AM
    #11
    JRFugitt

    JRFugitt [OP] Well-Known Member

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    HaHa!^ Thanks for all the advice guys. I sat down with him and accepted the gift. I tried to give him the savings account number where I will be repaying it so he can check on it time to time.. I told him it would start slow but as the rest of my small bills fall off it would ramp up. Just didn't want him to think I was just paying the least amount I could. He didn't want the account info. He is a good friend, the kind of friend that would be there loaded out with one phone call if you know what I mean. We were looking at sales ads yesterday before I left work and the Rugger 22mag he's been looking for showed up at a reasonable price. Should I get it for him? I would like to but don't want him to think I'm blowing money, heck I quit smoking and drinking Dr.Pepper to save even more money so I can close everything out in a couple months. The post above from Palehorse1, the funny thing is I am great at budgeting, I just had a huge motocross wreck two years ago and was down for 6 months then my son was born. Then we had the ac go out in the house twice with a newborn in Texas summertime, then the main plumbing stack broke (behind the new custom cabinets I built!). All this in two years would wipe out any ones savings, but yes we discuss all options and ways to get where we want to both be. I am very grateful there are nice people in the world still and feel so much lighter!
     
  12. Feb 9, 2015 at 6:47 AM
    #12
    PB65stang

    PB65stang Well-Known Member

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    Personally, I wouldn't buy the gun for him, for the reason you stated. He gave you the money to help your family, not to buy him a gift. Just guessing, but probably the best thing you could give him in return is to treat him as a part of your family (invite to gatherings, holidays, etc.) and show him how much you value the gift by putting it to good use and getting yourself back on your feet (which it fully sounds like you are doing). He sounds like a special person to have in your life, and I think all he wants is the satisfaction of knowing that he helped out someone in need who he cares for.
     
  13. Feb 9, 2015 at 6:50 AM
    #13
    WMDtech

    WMDtech Well-Known Member

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    None... sigh
    Agreed
     
  14. Feb 9, 2015 at 4:16 PM
    #14
    JRFugitt

    JRFugitt [OP] Well-Known Member

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    yeah that's what I was thinking, just would like to do something nice for him, but yes agreed.
     

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