Parking Lot Stories: EP1 This is why we (humanity) can't have nice things

Prologue: it was (and still is) a great day. Works been a drag this week but it's the freakin' weekend!! Almost.

Situation - parked at WaWa to grab some breakfast on the way to work. Parking was tight, so I couldn't do my usual "park as far as way from other drivers as possible" technique. I made sure I gave each side PLENTY of room. After checking out, I walk out and see the red FJ cruiser has his wide open (like as far as it will go), which also means the edge of his door is "resting" against my drivers side rear fender.

Here's the conversation that took place - the dude's door was still open (and in the side of my truck) when I walked up but he closed as he got ready to drive away. I rapped my knuckles twice on his window and confronted him:

Me: excuse me, do you want to explain to me what that is?

Dumbass: I'm not sure what you're talking about

Me: do you want to explain to me what that is? **points 2 feet away to a red scratch/scuff on my rear fender**

dumbass: I didn't do that **slightly tries to close his door but I put my hand up to stop it**

Me: you had your door in the side of my truck - do you want to explain why would couldn't open your door without hitting my truck?

Dumbass: sorry, I didn't even notice that I did it

Me: you did even notice?? How do you not notice that? **shakes head and laughs**

That doesn't surprise me with that small head of yours. **turns around and gets in taco and proceeds with day**

Dumbass: excuse me?? **looks like he hit a brick wall going 100 (as in, highly offended) and puts his car in D (he needed to be in reverse) almost hits the car in front of him - and I can tell he's just processing what happened and it was highly amusing to watch. Side note, I bet he needs to get that front seat cleaned too bc I was calm but I was definitely in his face. Anyway, I waved/threw up the deuces to him when I drove out.

Summary: although I do have a scuff on my rear fender (I think most of it will come out with a clay bar), I feel like I came out on top of this. Had I just discovered the scuff and not known who it was I would have been pissed/ it would have ruined my day. But getting to confront him allowed me to say my part, voice my displeasure and make sure he remembered how people can react when you mindlessly damage other people's personal property and that he's a dumbass. I respect your property, I expect the same - disrespect my property and I'll disrespect you haha. I still respect your property bc it's an innocent victim in this.

Proof:

 

Too bad your keyring/beltbuckle didn't leave a response on his door panel!
I hate douchebags like that!

 

My wife thinks I am an idiot for parking so far away. It's even worse when it is a Sunday night and you are in Toy's R Us right near closing, and it's you and another lady in the store. You take a faraway end spot where nobody else is. The other person is 6 cars away from the cart return. You now see the other person at the register ( The fat obese slob ) and you are next. It's a little windy that day and you are looking out the window as you pay and you see this cart moving because of the wind. And low and behold that fat piece of lazy shit couldn't burn 6 calories to return her cart and there it goes headed towards my Brand New 2015 Tacoma DCLB with 600 miles on it. Luckily they were plastic carts, as it hit the front door then skidded down the whole passenger side of the truck. Everything was buffed out except the 2 door dings in the front door. I will always park in East Bum Blast to avoid this kind of shit. Because most people don't give two shits about other people's property. Yeah I said it OPP

 

People will tear up your stuff and never think twice about it. If we are going somewhere that I know you have to take whatever spot you can get, I.E. downtown, big events, businesses during their prime time, etc., we take the wife's car.

 

Sup bro!

You like the new Beavis'd emoji?

 

As do I brother

 

I do the same thing, park out far and make sure that my truck is centered in the parking spot so that no one dings my sh!t. At work, I've had that happen to me twice. Last one I paid 100 bucks to get repaired.

 

Love it nice thinking

 

The Bob can be way cool sometimes!

 

It appears so sir

 

sir... I ain't been Knighted yet!

 

Getting one of those is on my to-do list but I ain't in too much of a rush haha.

Incidentally, Dumbass was also pretty obese - lets just say the only off-roading that FJ will do will be if he hops a curb at Cosco.

That was definitely the last time I'll risk not parking far as hell from everyone else (unless there's another taco ).

 

Yet

 

I always park away, but If i ever caught someone with their door on my truck, I would have done the same thing you did(while secretly digging my key into their paint as i'm talking in their window). With my parking far away, and my sliders, I have no door dings.

 

Oh, I forgot to add VV

 

It's amazing what people will do. My friend got back to his truck after a day on the ski hill to see something similar. A guy in an expensive vehicle was loading up his ski gear and had his skis leaned against the (less expensive) vehicle next to him. My friend confronted they guy in a very calm and degrading manner. When my friend admitted that the victimized vehicle did not belong to him the guy asked why he cared... Unbelievable.

 

women tend to grab the closest parking spot available. If one is ten feet away, farther from the store and theres no cars, theyll ignore it.

Park next to someone else JUST cause its ten feet of less walking.

 

Parking far is the way to go, even before I got my taco I would park as far as possible with a 2004 Ford Expedition with 100,000 miles. This because this same expedition got side swiped in the front at the pool by some jerk who left without a note...