Work Restroom Etiquette

Go hit the head and read on!

That violates Man Rule # 4 - No phone in the crapper, but this one time can be an exception!

 

My favorite

 

My brother is just the sick fuck to do this kind of stuff. He would frequently drop the deuce in 1 toilet and waddle over to the next just to wipe his ass while at work. He wanted to be sure that whoever opened that stall got an overdose of his smelly logs.

The fucker is actually proud of his dumps.

 

In Congress, they prefer stalls. Or boy's locker rooms.

 

Years ago, I used to work at a summer camp in high school. We were told that there was a little poop on the floor in the boys room of the un-air conditioned metal gym. The trots started at the doorway of the bathroom and culminated fifteen feet later in the last stall in an explosion that made the bathroom scene from Dumb and Dumberer seem tame, completed with destroyed underwear discarded in the corner. No AC, no fan, just crap-pocolypse in the Texas summer.

 

Engineers are social retards. Strong on theory, weak on application.

 

I call it the "strain rail"

 

We have higher expectations for the Master Race. Seig Heil!

 

That's creepy!!!

 

My first job, back in 2001 I think, was at a grocery store. Typical teenager job, push shopping carts, help cashiers bag and clean the shitters. The women's bathroom in this store was ALWAYS 10x worse then the men's room. Shit over flowed thrones, dirty tampoons in every place except the trash can, dirty shity underwear, whole rolls of tp dropped in piss filled toilets.....
Yea I kept that job for about 3 months

 

Ya the nasty spy guy who has to see who is taking a dump and looks through the the gap at you.....I've yelled at that guy before......super creepy

 

I was at a large venue a couple weeks back to see monster trucks. Had to shit, and there was no holding it. Go to the back room and the stall must have had a 1" gap all the way around the door. Everyone that walked in stared me down

 

Yeah it was that way in Nicaragua as well.

 

Dude, it was SO bad. Montezuma's Revenge is no joke lol. Fortunately, by the time our plane took off I was just getting over the nausea stage, but the explosive diarrhea phase was still in effect and the overwhelming bloating/farting was still in full blown phase one.

Dealing with that on a 6 hour non-connecting flight was the definition of hell. Funny to think back on though and remember the looks on some people's faces, they knew what I was going through....it was the perfect mix of sympathy and utter disgust.

One guy gave me his bottle of Immodium, which I ate like candy to absolutely no avail...and that stuff is strong, it'll normally back me up for days.

Oh, and my girlfriend of just under 1 year was with me the entire time. Fun times.

 

Is she still with you?

 

Yes, she's a keeper lol.

 

Someone needs to clean the drinking fountain

 

There are some sick freaking people out there. Gotta love the people who piss into the deodorizers in the urinal. The piss sprays everywhere landing on them and the dividers (if there). As for the pubes. I think some sick bastards pull them out and fling them around. Are they flossing with these things or something? Wtf. My old boss was from the Middle East. Apparently they don't flush the TP. They roll it up and toss it out in the trash. Gross if you ask me. Even worse when the bathroom isn't A/C or have a exhaust fan. Lot of videos online where people just drop their pants in supermarkets and stuff and just drop a turd when on one is looking. Then simply pull pants back up and walk away. That should be a felony! Disgusting! It's one thing if you have to go extremely bad and you have an accident or something. Just to purposely lay a brick in the middle of a shopping market? I always try to hold it of possible but sometimes you just gotta let it out. I'll admit I've been in some pretty nasty bathrooms. I'll try to lay paper in the seat if it's unbearable but a few times I've just squatted on the seat. I still manage to make it into the bowl. For the times I use paper in the seat l, I'll used the up side of the paper to wipe my ass. If for any reason I need more after that I'll do a courtesy flush to make sure it all goes down. Sometimes it's a good idea to flush a toilet before you even start just to make sure the person before you didn't clog it. Nothing worse then it already being clogged and you go to flush and nothing moves but the water level.