MAN CARD VIOLATIONS

Like to generate a list of basic violations of manhood. Have a coworker who is 24 and will not stop talking about Pokemon. He is young and I don't won't to insult him so I'm venting here. Trying to make him a list of rules. Let's hear some other items that should be on this list.

 

Men who sit in a chair and cross their legs like a woman.

 

Limp hand shakes.

 

No eye contact when introduced.

 

Tell him grow the fuck up then hand him a knife, fishing line, fishing hook, and a lighter. To cut open and sew his balls back in and cauterize them after he located them. I don't think it's insulting

 

Cowboy boots in shorts.

 

Ridgeline.

 

Crocs

 

Wearing socks w/ sandals

 

Getting a 1/4lb burger instead of a 1/2lb

 

In a five urinal scenario, you walk into this:

[1] [2] [3] [4] [5]

5 is occupied. If you unzip anywhere other than #1, shred your card.

 

spacer lift

 

Mall crawlers

 

Black socks are ok in winter.

 

TOMS

 

Being afraid of guns/never having shot a gun is a pretty big man-card violation

Also, if you've ever used the words "triggered", "PC", or "safe space" in a serious manner

 

Prius w/or w/out coexist sticker.

 

Any dude that owns a selfie stick. -If people today can't ask a stranger to simply take a picture of themselves or can't fashion a crude tripod/stand if they are alone in the woods/mountains we need to reevaluate our culture and definition of manliness.

 

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Question. Was this made in response to the Pokemon Go thread that is also on the front page?