New way to Fight a War

New Direction for any war: Send Service Vets over 60!



I am over 60 and the Armed Forces thinks I'm too old to track down terrorists. You can't be older than 42 to join the military. They've got the whole thing azz-backwards. Instead of sending 18-year olds off to fight, they ought to take us old guys. You shouldn't be able to join a military unit until you're at least 35.

For starters: Researchers say 18-year-olds think about sex every 10 seconds. Old guys only think about sex a couple of times a day, leaving us more than 28,000 additional seconds per day to concentrate on the
enemy.

Young guys haven't lived long enough to be
cranky, and a cranky soldier is a dangerous soldier. 'My back hurts! I can't sleep, I'm tired and hungry' We are impatient and maybe letting us kill some azzhole that desperately deserves it will make us feel better and shut us up for a while.

An 18-year-old doesn't even like to get up
before 10 a.m. Old guys always get up early to pee so what the hell. Besides, like I said, 'I'm tired and can't sleep and since I'm already up,
I may as well be up killing fanatical s-o-b's....

If captured we couldn't spill the beans because
we'd forget where we put them. In fact, name, rank, and serial number would be a real
brainteaser...

Boot camp would be easier for old guys. We're
used to getting screamed and yelled at and we're used to soft food. We've also developed an appreciation for guns. We've been using them for years as an excuse to get out of the house, away from the screaming and yelling.

They could lighten up on the obstacle course
however. I've been in combat and didn't see a single 20-foot wall with rope hanging over the side, nor did I ever do any pushups after completing basic training.

Actually, the running part is kind of a waste of energy, too. I've never seen anyone outrun a
bullet.

An 18-year-old has the whole world ahead of him. He's still learning to shave, to start up a conversation with a pretty girl. He still hasn't figured out that a baseball cap has a brim to shade his eyes, not the back of his head.
These are all great reasons to keep our kids at
home to learn a little more about life before sending them off into harm's way.

Let us old guys track down those dirty rotten
coward terrorists. The last thing an enemy would want to see is a couple of million pizzed off old farts with attitudes and automatic weapons who know that their best years are already behind them.

***How about recruiting Women over 50 ...with PMS !!! You think Men have attitudes !!! Ohhhhhhhhhhhh my God!!!

If nothing else, put us on border patrol.....we
will have it secured the first night!

Share this with your senior friends. It's
purposely in big type so they can read it.

 

you sir get a check plus for the day

 

Pretty funny..

What about old men not being able to stay awake with the young guns? j/k.

 

Man that was funny!

 

we did have old men in the border patrol... they were called minute men and the gov kicked them out of the area

 

you got my vote. that was funny and very true !!!!!!

 

As a guy over 35 I will be willing to re-enlist. I want to have a shot at one of those assholes.

 

While the barrels are cooling we can take a nap

 

While I think that's funny as hell, I really think we should have combat units based on all women. Yup, once they start cycling together... you know, rotate a unit in-theater for a week, then out for 3. Let the PMS group do the fighting. Keep units seperate so they don't get out of sync.


Yeah, I'm going to hell for this thought.

 

you are right but there would be a lot of "Friendly Fire"