Dumblaws

Here are some dumb laws I put together for your enjoyment
from the dumblaws.com website.
I added my own commentary,
hopefully it will give you a laugh.

Enjoy!!
Sean (genxer36)
Post which one is your favorite.


Alabama

Incestuous marriages are legal. (This is my wife-sister-aunt-cousin Mary Sue)

You may not drive barefooted. (What the hell! But you can marry
your sister)

Boogers may not be flicked into the wind. (The next summer
Olympic event to be added, Booger flickin!)

Men who deflower virgins, regardless of age or marital status,
may face up to five years in jail. (So is this to stop the inbreeding?
That is legal !)

http://www.dumblaws.com/laws/united-states/alabama/?page=0
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Georgia

Signs are required to be written in English. (Amen!)

Acworth - All citizens must own a rake. (Must be a where
all the landscapers live;Julio,Juan,& Miguel)

Athens - It is illegal for one to make a disturbing sound at a fair.
(I guess I shouldn't of had that chillidog)

Atlanta - Against the law to tie a giraffe to a telephone pole or
street lamp. (Must be from those crazy conventioneers)

Gainesville - Chicken must be eaten with the hands.
(As opposed to your feet)

Quitman - It is illegal for a chicken to cross the road.
(How does the chicken get to the otherside?)

Roswell - The flooring of adult bookstores and video stores
must be nonabsorbant and smooth textured.
(No comment needed)
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Tennessee

You can't shoot any game other than whales from a moving automobile.
(This is probably a big problem at the aquarium)

Giving and receiving oral sex is still prohibited by law.
(Good reason not to live in Tennessee)

Driving is not to be done while asleep. (Good to know)

It is legal to gather and consume roadkill.
(I wonder if roadkill is loaded with tryptophan
& may cause sleeping while driving)

Memphis- illegal for a woman to drive a car unless there is
a man either running or walking in front of it waving a red
flag to warn approaching motorists and pedestrians.
(How embarrassing if you were the driver, I think I'll walk.)

Fayette County - You may not have more than
five inoperable vehicles on a piece of property.
(You might be a redneck if.....5! But 4 is OK!)
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Virginia

Citizens must honk their horn while passing other cars.
(Noisy state)

Waynesboro- It is illegal for a woman to drive a car up
Main Street unless her husband is walking in front of the
car waving a red flag. (There must be something to this
women driver thing)

Culpeper - No one may wash a mule on the sidewalk.
(Get your ass off the sidewalk)

Norfolk - Spitting on a sea gull is not tolerated.
(Have you ever tried to get near a seagull?
Good luck spitting on one)
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New Mexico

Hunting is prohibited in Mountain View Cemetery.
(Uhh! Do you know how a cemetery works?)

You may not carry a lunchbox down Main Street.
(This must be to help the restaurant economy)
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South Dakota

If there are more than 5 Native Americans on
your property you may shoot them.
(P.E.T.A. has the slogan "fur is murder". S. Dakota has
the slogan "Native Americans are legal" to murder)

Spearfish- If three or more Indians are walking down
the street together, they can be considered a war party
and fired upon.
(What is it with the indians? Not a good place for indians to
raise a family)
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North Dakota

It is legal to shoot an Indian on horseback, provided
you are in a covered wagon.
(Me say - Indians you-stay-out-of-Dakotas, you-live-longer)
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Montana

Seven or more indians are considered a raiding or
war party and it is legal to shoot them.
(Well we now know the midwest is not indian country)


It is illegal to have a sheep in the cab of your truck
without a chaperone.
(Uhh! What if the chaperone is into sheep also)

Billings - It is illegal to bring a bomb or
rocket at city council proceedings.
(Ya think!)


Whitehall - It is illegal to operate a
vehicle with ice picks attached to the wheels.
(You might be a redneck if...
You make your own snow tires for your pickup)

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New York

Women may go topless in public, providing it is not being
used as a business. (Woohoo! So much for advertising
for the plastic surgeon)

It is illegal for a woman to be on the street wearing
"body hugging clothing. (But topless is fine?)


The penalty for jumping off a building is death.
(Not too bright in New York are they? Isn't that
the point)

Carmel - A man can't go outside while wearing a jacket and
pants that do not match. (Home of the Garanimals.
Match the animal tags on your clothes so you know it matches)
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Alaska
It is considered an offense to push a live moose
out of a moving airplane. (Skydiving moose)

Moose may not be viewed from an airplane.
(What if it jumped from another airplane near you?)

Anchorage - No one may tie their pet dog to the roof of a car.
(Are you sure were not in Alabama?)

Fairbanks - It is considered an offense to feed alcoholic beverages
to a moose. (This must be were the skydiving moose got his start)

 

thats crazy

 

Alaska is my favorite!

 

Drunk moose skydiving. LOL,ps.thanks for the rep.

 

Damn, no Florida jokes. There's got to be something ass backwards in this state!

 

This is something I put together about 6 months ago. I will try and find something for Florida, so you won't feel left out.

 

There is something about West Virginia too...

Not sure exactly what the words say...but something to this effect...

Its illegal to beat your wife unless your on the courthouse steps on sunday in broad daylight....then its legal...

I'll dig up the source and post it...

 

Some of NJ stupid laws.


New Jersey Crazy Law

# It is against the law for a man to knit during the fishing season.

# You may not slurp your soup.

# If you have been convicted of driving while intoxicated, you may never again apply for personalized license plates.

# It is against the law to "frown" at a police officer.

# On a highway you can not park under a bridge.

# Car dealerships are forbidden from opening on Sunday.

# You cannot pump your own gas. All gas stations are full service and full service only.

# Automobiles are not to pass horse drawn carriages on the street.

# It is illegal to delay or detain a homing pigeon.

 

sounds liek we need to update.........alot!!!

 

Florida

The state constitution allows for freedom of speech, a trial by jury, and pregnant pigs to not be confined in cages.
(Squeel, squeel -reference from the movie Deliverence)


Corrupting the public morals is defined as a nuisance, and is declared a misdemeanor offense.
(Well Missleman, sorry you are going to have to leave Florida)

It is illegal to sell your children.
(Damn Ebay! They almost were going to quit costing me money)

Women may be fined for falling asleep under a hair dryer, as can the salon owner.
(The gossip columnists must have lobbied for this law.
Where else would they get there info?)

Men may not be seen publicly in any kind of strapless gown.
(Good to know! Sorry fellas, you can't wear your wifes
evening gown)

Having sexual relations with a porcupine is illegal.
(Who is the moran that they had to make this a law for?
But having relations with any other animal is ok?)

It is illegal to skateboard without a license.
(Must be the elderly getting back @ the young people.)

These are for Missleman, Dude you are screwed!

When having sex, only the missionary position is legal.
(What fun is that?)


You may not fart in a public place after 6 P.
(The real reason we have ozone problems: New codes
Code Yellow - Broccoli
Code Orange - Lima / pinto beans
Code Red - Loaded Chilli dog with baked beans)

It is considered an offense to shower naked.
(Unless the chick is Hott!)

Oral sex is illegal.
(As the great band Judas Priest once said I'm " Breakin the Law, Breakin the Law")
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OYn5hxeFt10

You may not kiss your wife’s breasts.
(There again, How else are you going to aquire illegal oral sex?)

 

You mean you can't have sex with a porcupine? Well, damn!
My favorite is the last one! Only in Florida.

 

Maybe they meant this type of rake:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MjtWQtDEFDI

 

Oh my, are all these for real? that's weird, and stupid!

 

These were great! Too many good ones to pick a favorite.

 

thisis hilarious. whats so funny is that you know alot of them had to be put into place because it actually happened...... poor flying moose...

 

Excuse the pun! They must be a gas guzzler!