Norcal Spotted and BS Thread

Unicorn!

 

I've been an adult as long as you've known me

 

UNICYCLE

 

i think you meant unicycle
but if there was a unicorn then congrats on seeing it few have been gifted with the pleasure of seeing one

 

I'm planning on it. Just needed something quick to start getting some income lol. Got out of active in September after 8 years. Been doing national guard since. I will be done with it in September again. So just trying to keep this job for now and try to find a better job later on. They are starting me at $18 an hour so that won't be bad. Just need to get some leaf springs so it doesn't sound like 1000 loose sockets in the bed of my truck while driving haha

 

Papers are submitted. Waiting on approval through VA... of course haha

 

https://www.tacomaworld.com/threads/2017-norcal-tw-newbies-thread.467253/page-4#post-14014551

@916TacoTruck

 

No monies mean stuck with rattling, saggy ass rear leaf springs haha

 

Unicorns are actually pretty common I see them all the time. Have you not been to @jberry813 build thread?
#alsodildos

 

Leave them shiny and gouge the shit out of them for that DGAF look.

 

Any of you Santa Rosa peeps headed towards Sacramento in the next few weeks and wants to TW Express me a few cases of Pliny the Elder?? I can't find it out my way anywhere. Unless someone in Sacramento area knows where I can locate some.......

 

Thats basically the current look. I figured the rockrash guard role is just as well as being poser beadlocks...

Oh, and man did those tires sell fast!

 

Just fyi. That requires someone going to the brewery 3 times. You can only buy a case per day. Also, they're $70.
Just a heads up as to what is involved.

That said, I'll be headed to tahoe early june. Could probably help then if needed

 

Well, looks like it's too late...

 

With the talk of truck shenanigans I gift you guys the story of my boss' wedding

I may delete so enjoy while you can

(This is obviously before I met my wife)

The night before I was asked to barback at the liquor establishment I frequented. Fuck yeah. Out til 4am drunk as fuck. Boss getting married had asked me to cover his water polo tournament the next day. My gift was to miss the ceremony coaching but be there for the reception and party. After the night before I somehow made it to the high school at 6am. Tournaments a bit of a blur, but we won one lost one.

Drove straight from the tourney to the reception, changed in the parking lot. Slam a few at the open bar and I'm right back to liquored up. Then I see her. The chick I had hoped would be there. We hooked up a few months prior. Locked eyes.

I shit you not this happened next.

She walked right over and told me she hadn't stopped thinking about my unit and needed it. RIGHT NOW!! My response, "I have a camper shell". Straight to the truck, wham bam thank you ma'am. Apparently we were gone too long and people were wondering. My oldest sister got a memory she'd rather forget looking for me

(Edit so far all before 4pm)

After that the wine flowed like water

So fast forward a few hours and our table is sloppy drunk. My good friend knows the story of the day and asks her about it. No shame whatsoever she says, "I'll suck the p***y juice off his d**k"

I remember her taking my hand and walking me to the bathroom. I remember trying to convince her men's. She was adamant women's. So in I went (pun I intended).

Long story short, the brides family heard a 'strange sucking sound' and knew what was going on. One of my very last memories is my boss and very good friend mad at me outside the bathroom.

My next memory is the sound of fire and police trucks. I had passed out in a driveway blocks from the ceremony. Resident called, thought I was dead. I was planning on sleeping in the truck. Must not have been able to find it.

So I'm woken up and put in handcuffs. I was respectful and the cop called a cab. If it got there before she had another call I could leave. Otherwise it was jail . Cab made it


Puked all over my floor and dress shoes during the night. Lost my cell phone. Had to find a working pay phone hung over as fuck and shoeless. My sandals, sneakers, and hiking boots were all in the truck

My friends nicknamed her Erubiel Durazo

My wife knows this story

I do not plan on ever running for politics

This is all 100% true

Do I win?

 

I feel like I've heard this before, and I still like it.

 

Shoulda quoted the whole thing...but that's a good story except you're remembering too many details for DAF.

 

Should have added I forgot about the bathroom incident until I made it to a friends house next afternoon and he reminded me. The last details are what has come back to me. Trust me, top 3

 

I totally gave it a 10.