Cap City Build & BS AF

Ugh. I hate pages like this

 

1.


These mall crawlers are the most common and are usually purchased previously customized by either the dealership or the former owner. The list of modifications can actually be quite lengthy and the upgrades useful, but a Stage One vehicle will never see more off-road situations than parking on the grass at the local high school football game. Key indicators of The Suburban Special is a fairly new vehicle with a modest lift, knobby tires and some sort of useless LED lighting. If it’s a Jeep and purchased at a dealership who specializes in upgrading off-road vehicles, it might have a winch, custom bumpers and hi-lift jack mounted somewhere in plain sight.


2.


After mall crawling for a six to twelve month period, most owners either go in one direction or the other. They either are completely satisfied with their additions and cruise around the malls and go to the lake in their “off-road” rig. The other contingent sees the first truck that passes by with a taller lift and it eats away at their soul every day until they’re forced to upgrade even further. Perhaps you bought a brand new Chevy Silverado 1500 from the local dealership with a leveling kit and 33-inch mud tires. Suddenly, you find yourself searching desperately for the top lift shop in your area. The next thing you know it, you’ve traded in your truck for a Silverado HD 2500 diesel, have a 7-inch lift and 37-inch tires. You feel like the baddest thing on the road but also acknowledge there’s no going back. You’ve spent tens of thousands of dollars just to get shitty gas mileage and not be able to fit in parking garages or most parking spaces for that matter. At least you’ll get a lot of Instagram followers!

3.


If you’ve ever been to SEMA or viewed pictures from the massive show in Las Vegas, this is where you will find Stage Three Mall Crawlers. Typically, these vehicles have anywhere from $100k up to a half a million in upgrades in addition to the cost of the truck. The list of add-ons is endless with some of the more popular upgrades being powder-coated frames, chrome suspension and massive forged wheels. Wheel and tire packages alone can cost $25,000. Stage Three trucks also feature virtually every aftermarket item possible from $500 tow hooks to $3000 bumpers. When a truck achieves this status, the only place you can take it is to a car show.

 

@ki11switch ​

 

I see lifted Chevy, Fords, and Dodge trucks around here all the time. That Jeep can be seen anywhere in Austin with a girl driving it. Yes, she will be wearing leggings and have a pumpkin spice latte.

Burn them all.

 

She hot or nah?

 

I wonder how many of the lifted vehicles that drove through high water will grenade their diffs from the water that got in.

 

In Austin? Normally yes. In Houston or San Antonio...she's got the "extra strength" leggings on. Spandex and Kevlar for added reinforcement. Drops her from a size 20 to a size 12. Looks like a mushroom when she walks. Her muffin top has muffin top. The only reason her tits are perky is because they're resting comfortably on her belly.

Thank God I live in Austin.

 

Austin Jeep Chic FTMFW!

 

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I ate Taco Bell for lunch

Feel like death atm

 

You'll be like this soon

 

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woah now
I dont have two muffin tops!

 

You in San Antonio? Because I lived there when they lost "fattest city in America" to Houston. They celebrated...with bread.

 

i'm in houston