Weird random pain... WTF is wrong?

Nope, its just gas.

 

In your chest?

 

Must be helium!

 

I have had some digestion issues over the past year or so. When you are skinny, a backed up fart can wreak havoc on your day.

 

I haven't been skinny since my motocross days. Then sports and weight lifting etc. Been over 200 since 10th grade. Trying to get to 192 but the bacon won't let me.

 

I am about 140 soaking wet.
I feel like a over stuffed burrito most days.

 

Mmmmmm.......burritos.......

 

I’m missing something...

 

Been having relatively severe stomach pain the last few nights. Turns into gas and then it gets better. 'Cept that one night (I don't know what day it is) where I was in the bathroom half the night. I think it's some stomach bug, there's a bit of that going around they say. Whoever they are.

 

I want to die in my sleep like grandpa, not screaming like his passengers.

 

Story about these fucking things.... Was hucking these fuckers around the back yard when I was about... 7 ish... Grabbed one by the fin and was going yard on this one. Probably looking to hit the ring at 75 ft.
Whoosh... I sling the fucker hard as I can.

Wait. What... Why am I just holding the fin wings? Where did the giant metal rod go?

CRACK

Right down on top of my nugget. Split my wig like a ripe melon. I take a knee. Touch the top of my head, see blood and casually walk into the house.
Blood is pouring down my face and my mom screams bloody murder.

Pretty sure they were all high or drunk, so I never made it to the hospital. I think they just threw a band aid on it and gave me a capri sun.

Good times.

 

I think I either need to lay off carbs and go Keto like the wife... or lay off the sugar.
Im not a huge sweet snacker, but I like my fruits and most of them are high in sugars....

Trying to figure out why I get this bloated tight ball on the right side slightly above the stomach....
Im going to starve myself to death trying to figure it out im sure.

 

Yep



I stuck one in the shingle roof of our shed one time. Never told my step day. Funny, that shed started leaking water after a few months. Damndest thing!

 

Those shingles are prone to leaking. Not your fault.

 

I had the same thing happen. That's when I had an MRI and found out I had liver spots or liver disease. I also found out that year that I was a type II diabetic. Might wanna get that A1C checked pretty soon! I love my sweets too but that curbed it for me. Been on Metphormin for 5 years now. I can still eat what I like but very sparingly now. I lost 22 lbs almost overnight and started having more energy immediately. It was worth cutting back. The bad part is I had to give up good beers as they are notoriously high in carbs. Now I drink Lite, Bud Light, Michelob Ultra if I want to drink drink. Otherwise I can have a couple Fat Tires and a salad for dinner.

 

Damn right! Hehe

 

Hope nobody gets shingles up in here, after them being mentioned!