Whatever

I don't even like it when my bra strap shows but that's just me. If she's confident or carefree enough to pop it out in public then whatever. Not my cup of tea or preference but also not my kid or boob.

 

my brother’s girlfriend is from South Africa, and when she was first here in Florida— some women had to explain that top less isn’t allowed on the beach
She was amazed…

 

Brewed in God's country...

 

Yes, please.

She kinda has that sexy librarian look...

 

fixed it for ya

 

Pictures or it didn't happen

 

You'll have to wait on that one. I'm just hoping my decision to ignore their "size down if you're in between sizes" was the right move

 

You like hiding things, don’t you?

 

Hmmm... what size did you end up ordering? Asking for a friend.

 

A large. The one I ordered sits pretty low and I think I'd be chancing a muffin top if I went with the medium.

 

I went for a physical the other day. The doctor gave me a jar and said, "Take this jar home and bring back a semen sample tomorrow."

The next day I went back with the jar still empty. The doctor asked “What happened? The jar is still empty.”

I explained. "Well, doc, it's like this... first I tried with my right hand, but nothing. Then I tried with my left hand, but still nothing. Then I asked my wife for help. She tried with her right hand, then with her left, still nothing. She tried with her mouth, first with the teeth in, then with her teeth out, still nothing.
We even called up Arleen, the lady next door and she tried too, first with both hands, then she even tried squeezing it between her knees, but still nothing. We even asked her husband to help. He tried with both hands. Still no luck."

The doctor was shocked. "You asked your neighbour?! And her husband?!”

I said. "Yep, none of us could open the jar"

 

I'm not small

 

In terms of girth, or length? Or both?

Wait, what are we talking about here?

 

Puts a whole new spin on packing a 9