Life improvement thread

Hang in there OP.
Keep your head up and take it a day at a time with your mind set on the bigger picture.

Edit: I felt for me when I quit smoking (and cutting back on drinking) was staying busy. Changing routines to fill those times slots of unhealthy habits.
Just some examples.
Started walking the dog first thing in the morning / evenings instead of smoking.
Getting off work and instead of getting a drink right away, going to the gym or just go for a walk (podcast helped a lot from boredom) or bike ride.

 

I drink a 30 pack of bud light every two days. Roughly 15 beers a day. Weekends sometimes more. Cooler in the truck 24/7 and from the time I get off work till I go to bed there is a beer in my hand. In public I use my Yeti 30oz cup to hide it. Been doing this for many years now. My wife calls me a functioning alcoholic because I still work my ass off around the house and have no problem working on our Toyotas and work on outboard motors on the side. I used to get depressed for no real reason but the beer takes all that away. I know I need to stop or at least cut back some but hell I don't want to. My Doc just told me I was in better shape than most guys half my age.
The money I spent on beer since I bought my truck in 2015. I could have done every mod there is...

 

One thing that I will never do is attach the label of alcoholic to someone. I think that it's a personal thing that someone needs to decide for themselves. That said; denial is a big part of AA and funny, but for me I never had a problem knowing that I didn't drink like the rest of the friends I had. I'm talking about a young, very young age like pre-teen. I was the one who kept drinking to the point of pass out, blackout.
It use to make me a little angry if someone called me a alcoholic, possibly because the truth hurt.
But with all that said, you have to be the judge if it's a problem or not, and I might caution that I've both heard and seen that alcoholism is a progressive disease.

 

Im an alcoholic. Always will be.
Been drinking since I was 13. Refined my drinking skills with a 23 year military career. Hit rock bottom. I blacked out and dont remember shit. That was it. Havent had a drop going on 8 years. Dont want it dont need it. I tame my demons with caffeine(coffee,tea).
Just quit chew yesterday.
Hate weed... massive paranoia.
Like reality... now.

Put your head in the right place you will be surprised the power of your brain.

Good luck dude and to all of you that have beat it congratulations.

 

Is this a humble-brag? Very useful post

 

It takes stones to do what you did on this forum. Years ago I felt the way you described in your post. I did what you did and reached out to people I didn't know very well and asked their counsel That led me to a meeting of AA. There I learned that I suffer from a physical allergy that coupled with a mental compulsion to have "one drink" meant I set in motion the phenomenom of craving for which I had no answer. 21 sober years later I don't know if I'll drink tomorrow but the beauty is I only have to worry about today. Good luck my friend,and know that there is hope for guys like us.

 

I’ve always felt alcoholic drinking is a symptom as well as a disease. Whether it is used to soothe anxiety or depression or numb painful memories of traumatic events. Then the alcohol itself adds more problems and misery, a quick solution to which is more alcohol. And the spiral begins.

 

There’s also other recovery groups if AA doesn’t work for you. Celebrate Recovery is one I know of. And in most areas that are somewhat populated there are enough meetings that you can hit one or more a day if needed.

Congrats on admitting you have a problem. Now you have a chance to change your life.

 

I just wanted to say thank you to everyone on here for taking the time to read and respond. I really wasn’t expecting the support and it means everything to me.

 

Hey man. You understand what you are doing is unhealthy and self destructive, so you're at least a step in the right direction.

I could give you my own addiction story, but it's boring and in the past. What worked for me was not a support group, although I highly recommend it.

If you need anything please PM as others have said.

 

Apparently you’ve got at least 24 hours under your belt and that’s huge! Congrats and good luck.

 

Keep up the good work. Every hour forward counts. Cold turkey absolutely can work. You may feel strange for a few days or more. Food, exercise and distractions are safe bets. TW is “up” 24/7, you won’t be very long, but you may have a few restless nights. Go build something, or walk in the woods. Cook a steak and salad.

Call your parents, they already know you need help. AA, and etc. work for a lot of people.

My downward spiral ended almost 30 years ago. It has been replaced with a productive fruitful and meaningful life. My brother and uncle were not so lucky. You can do this, you will do this.

 

My life is similar. No friends, just my mom. Most my drinking goes back to my childhood of constant beatings. My drinking really stepped up a few years ago when I lost my friends of 16+ years when another friend started doing drugs and I was blamed for it. I don’t do drugs nor do I condone it.

Recently I was able to put forth my plan of leaving California. Decided the less I spend on booze the nicer my house could be, the more toys I could have, MTB’s, guns, or the truck I’ve always wanted. And the biggest motivator is I don’t want to die early and have no one take care of my mom. So I started substituting beer for tea and that’s seemed to take away the nighttime beer cravings. Now I just have tea, a night cap just to “feel good”, and go to sleep.

 

My dad’s name was Stan. He died because he was a heavy drinker and at a traumatic time in his life he was given meds by a well meaning gp that couldn’t be taken with alcohol. He couldn’t stop the beers but took the drugs to dull the pain. It dulled it forever. My pain is still here decades later.


A friend is dealing with end of life issues with her dad. He was a person who just couldn’t stop the constant alcohol intake. He functioned just fine slightly pickled all the time but the cirrhosis got him. Not a fun way to go.
Operations to drain excess fluid are the only thing keeping him alive unless a transplant happens. Problem is you don’t qualify for a transplant unless you have a good amount of sober time.


The fact that you can’t function after work without a beer in your hand worries me as it should you. Try limiting it to just one after work for a week or two and see how it goes. I’m betting it’ll be harder than hell.

If you decide to try sobriety after that experiment feel free to post here or message any of us. I’m working on seven years myself and reading your post reminded me where I could be in a heartbeat if I decided to pick up again.

Good luck sir!

 

PM sent.

 

There is a lot of good advice here. I takes a lot of guts to admit publicly that you have a problem and need help.

That's the first step.
There will be times that you want to give up completely and other times that you'll convince yourself the just one drink is okay or the just one night of drinking will be okay and then you won't drink afterwards.

Those are lies that people tell themselves because telling oneself no is very difficult. One thing to know, is that alcoholism is a disease that you have power over, but you need to take control of yourself and tell yourself no. It's really hard but you CAN do it. Find some good support, preferably someone that is a alcoholic that is sober.

You can do this! If you ever want to talk, send me a DM.

 

I got my freedom from the army little more than a year after that night.
That was a good time, but I regret not being as helpful as I should’ve been. I hope you, your friend with the orange jeep, and @Bebop are all doing well.

 

I cannot speak to you from experience in some of these aspects, but I hope a few ideas already mentioned get through.

Focus on the things you want to do, how you want to live, and set real goals for your life.
Goals give you purpose, and purpose gives you meaning.
If you are missing that meaning to your life, nothing works right.

Life can be hard, but finding fulfillment is possible and that makes all the effort worth it.
Best wishes