IT BS thread

SO just emailed they're now doing time cards manually due to log4j. She's the timekeeper and is just fucking thrilled.

 

It keeps getting better

https://twitter.com/laughing_mantis/status/1470412026119798786?s=28

 

Poster up in our Linux admin shop.

I had a problem
So I used Java to fix it.

Now I have
137 problems.

 

https://twitter.com/theasf/status/1400875147163279374?s=21

 

https://twitter.com/cannibal/status/1470531645446918144?s=21

 

Updated version of a classic

 

Yes, Santa! Please bring me a 24 port, L3, POE switch. My home network could use some upgrading.

 

I run a 43 person team; 12 FTEs and 31 contractors. My best are former system administrators because they know how to talk to sysads and help them plan vulnerability remediation.

Our issues are senior leaders who don’t understand why they have to pay for overtime for off-peak time patching, and user communities who are burned out on testing patches in lower environments.

“We just did this two weeks ago!”

Yes, Buford, and three new criticals popped on the new Nessus. Patching window is 2 weeks per CISA. Either we test it to see if breaks the app, or we risk taking you down. Your call.

 

Stop pushing my buttons!

 

My buttons get pushed HARD every time I got in with the director and we start doing the manpower budget drill.

It’s not like this work is going away, and I’m having a horrible time getting even one of my contractor positions converted to FTE. Bottom line is that it doesn’t cost us any more total, but the benefits are far greater. FTEs can have legal authority, and we need that dealing with CISA.

But fuck me, because we keep making do with who we have, there’s no “critical need.”

My wife just says it’s “job security.”

 

Fixed

 

Is your name Yes Sir, and do I work for you?

 

Depends. What’s your opinion of NIST 800-53 Rev 5 compared to ISO 27001?

If you have a good answer, I actually have a contractor vacancy. 100% remote. I can’t hire per se, but I can aim resumes at my contract lead all day long.

 

I will never work as a contractor again Man, I did it for a long time, but I am too old now.

 

Well fuck. There goes our new records system.

Oracle Buys Cerner
Oracle Buys Cerner
by Cerner Corporation
Published on December 20, 2021

AUSTIN, Texas and KANSAS CITY, Mo. — December 20, 2021 — Oracle Corporation (NYSE: ORCL) and Cerner Corporation today jointly announced an agreement for Oracle to acquire Cerner through an all-cash tender offer for $95.00 per share, or approximately $28.3 billion in equity value. Cerner is a leading provider of digital information systems used within hospitals and health systems to enable medical professionals to deliver better healthcare to individual patients and communities.

“Working together, Cerner and Oracle have the capacity to transform healthcare delivery by providing medical professionals with better information—enabling them to make better treatment decisions resulting in better patient outcomes,” said Larry Ellison, Chairman and Chief Technology Officer, Oracle. “With this acquisition, Oracle’s corporate mission expands to assume the responsibility to provide our overworked medical professionals with a new generation of easier-to-use digital tools that enable access to information via a hands-free voice interface to secure cloud applications. This new generation of medical information systems promises to lower the administrative workload burdening our medical professionals, improve patient privacy and outcomes, and lower overall healthcare costs.”

“We expect this acquisition to be immediately accretive to Oracle’s earnings on a non-GAAP basis in the first full fiscal year after closing—and contribute substantially more to earnings in the second fiscal year and thereafter,” said Safra Catz, Chief Executive Officer, Oracle. “Healthcare is the largest and most important vertical market in the world—$3.8 trillion last year in the United States alone. Oracle’s revenue growth rate has already been increasing this year—Cerner will be a huge additional revenue growth engine for years to come as we expand its business into many more countries throughout the world. That’s exactly the growth strategy we adopted when we bought NetSuite—except the Cerner revenue opportunity is even larger.”

“Cerner has been a leader in helping digitize medical care and now it’s time to realize the real promise of that work with the care delivery tools that get information to the right caregivers at the right time,” said David Feinberg, President and Chief Executive Officer, Cerner. “Joining Oracle as a dedicated Industry Business Unit provides an unprecedented opportunity to accelerate our work modernizing electronic health records (EHR), improving the caregiver experience, and enabling more connected, high-quality and efficient patient care. We are also very excited that Oracle is committed to maintaining and growing our community presence, including in the Kansas City area.”

“Oracle’s Autonomous Database, low-code development tools, and Voice Digital Assistant user interface enables us to rapidly modernize Cerner’s systems and move them to our Gen2 Cloud,” said Mike Sicilia, Executive Vice President, Vertical Industries, Oracle. “This can be done very quickly because Cerner’s largest business and most important clinical system already runs on the Oracle Database. No change required there. What will change is the user interface. We will make Cerner’s systems much easier to learn and use by making Oracle’s hands-free Voice Digital Assistant the primary interface to Cerner’s clinical systems. This will allow medical professionals to spend less time typing on computer keyboards and more time caring for patients.”

 

How I feel every time I see a FORTRAN ticket

 

On another note, I got to take a hovercraft to work over the weekend