PennSilverTaco's "Perfect 5-Lug Regular Cab" Build, Aspergers, and General BS MegaThread!

On another note, higher-functioning autistic individuals like my friends and me tend to stick together regardless of what we may or may not agree on, because these are trying times and we really need to stick together!

As mentioned above this girl I'm presently talking about continues to message me about future plans, like the aforementioned trip to Dorney Park when it warms up.

 

Or hunts and knows how to handle a shotgun (or any firearm for that matter)...



I've gone shooting before, but I've never been hunting, so that would be something that she would have to teach me!

 

Hit it and Quit it. /thread

 

Been there, done that; Big mistake...

 

@ColoradoTJ

Started a thread about it to see what other people think; I've seen people start threads about drinking problems on TW, so I figured I was good.

 

Read "Men are from Mars Women are from Venus" might help you understand women a bit better. Good luck in your quest.

 

Relationships are two way streets. Currently, with this gal everything on your side of the street is smooth paving and you are enjoying the relationship. Sounds like she is a great girl. Her side of the street, to her perception, is not as smooth or enjoyable. She has expressed she is seeking an out. Take that for what it is and be thankful for the time and allow yourself to move on from there.

I’ve been in your shoes before. It’s hard not having things go as you envision or how you want. Especially when everything looks so good from your perspective. I’m not the only one here that have refused to accept “defeat” and done everything to win the girl back. And the majority go on to find out later down the road, she is still seeing the not so great side of the road.

It’s okay. It’s not defeat. Be thankful she is being kind with you now while taking an out.

What makes relationships great is also what makes them hard to grasp. Sometimes the two people and perspectives perfectly mesh. Sometimes the gears wear prematurely and you gotta bite the bullet and get a new gear set.
Best of luck to ya friend!

 

Why does she keep messaging me then? She wants to hang out with me and my other friends (also Aspie), and I'm happy to have her, but she is sorta sending mixed signals...

 

No such thing.

Friends are important and have other friends to introduce to you.

If you like someone, never dread to be their friend.

Be kind to others and whatever happens, happens. The worst thing to do to yourself is to think being alone is a bad thing.

 

I love the "old school values" take. Usually comes down to: women should be this, not that, but I can do whatever I want.
Cool, there are women out there, usually religious, but not always, who fit into that mold.

Girls in bars aren't worth talking to, but you can go to bars. Girls in strip clubs (by inference) are not up to par, but you can go to strip clubs. You can do "locker room talk" but, again I'm inferring, girls maybe shouldn't? Or maybe no one can take offense to you talking about your "crazy bitch" ex cause really you're better than that? You've talked about hooking up with girls a bunch of times, but if those girls aren't worthwhile then why are you worthwhile? If hooking up with skanky girls is a problem, then stop being a skanky boy. See how that works?

Sounds like this girl you're into has taste in your opinion and you're kinda offended that her taste doesn't include you. You sound far from over it.

 

It is just what women do, get used to it...

"...What she wants I don't know / If red means stop / A'n green means go / Her light is always yellow..."
(Credit: John Michael Montgomery)

 

Just my cynical take, she justs wants a free meal, movie, similar (spectrum) friend...but isnt that in to you to go any further.

 

Actually, she effectively paid for the food and movie, but I agree with you; However, it is this behavior (on her part) that puts me off of dating Aspie girls.

 

I am not using the term "psycho bitch" lightly, I don't think I'm being skanky, as that girl was the only "skanky" one I ever carried on a relationship with. The problem wasn't that this girl was skanky, though it didn't help matter; She has bipolar disorder, and I do not use the term "psycho bitch" lightly. She needs help, but she is a grown woman and that is something she has to commit to herself, unless she finally snaps and ends up committed in a different kind of way. Trust me, the last girl I was with is a psycho bitch who I found out the hard way will become belligerent with anyone who "doesn't have her back", even if that means legitimizing her bad attitude and poor behavior.

 

This. Hence why if I do this for a friend, I don't ask for anything and if something is offered I just say "that's up to you". I've had people who have helped me do stuff at my house that I needed another person to do

 

On another note, guess who took a break from salting the ice patches in the parking lot at work to check his notifications on TW, and guess who is text messaging him going on about roller coaster, and a trip to a certain theme park in Allentown that is months away from even being planned...

And I'm the one who's obsessed?

 

4-letter word beginning with "G"...

 

Different hobbies aren't the underlying issue. I have my weird hobbies that my gal doesnt care about, she has hers, and then we have some that we share together. None of that means anything.

The thing that took me forever to learn, is that solid relationships need a solid foundation. And that foundation starts with a space where you have the trust and honesty to take a deep dive your emotional core and be able to extract and express exactly whats going on, then be willing to listen as she does the same. Good relationships have health checks, where every once in a while, you have that brutally honest state-of-the-union conversation of "hey, are we ok? What are you feeling? What needs fixing?"

Guys suck at this part. I suck at this part. But its something you gotta do, every once in a while you have to get into that crawlspace, check the foundation for cracks, and make adjustments when necessary. If you don't ever learn to explore that space, you will be forever scratching your head at the surface, going "what did she mean by that?" and wondering why she does the things she do.

Its a tough thing to learn. It took me multiple relationships and outside help to learn. But proper, honest communication and understanding "love languages" and all that other head shrinking stuff is a surefire way of having a mature, healthy relationship.


And from the sounds of what you are saying, I would be friends, keep it in a friend space for a minute. If you are getting clear signals that she is more interested in that, clearer than just wanting to hang out I mean, then its time to have that brutally honest conversation of "Where do you feel we are at, relationship wise, and where do you want it to be?"

 

Gonna think on this more, but I can relate in a way..my wife is not the slightest bit interested in some of my hobbies and passions, and does get vexed if I blab on and on about them. Some days she has less than usual tolerance let's say..haha

 

Yeah man sounds like shes not in to you, that or she's scared and coming up with excuses. I'd move on, if she calls you to hang out go for it but probably would stop putting in effort unless she shows interest.