Roast my Tacoma! (2nd gen edition)

You go and buy all the lights and bumpers but you got no lift and some boring Geolandars. The least you could do is get a basic bro lift.

I noticed you got that huge dent on your passenger rear fender. Did you try to do some Ken Block Hoonitruck or Tokyo Drift stuff in a snow filled Walmart parking lot and realized your just not a proffesional driver and your tired looking No-Landars failed you and tapped a light pole. You could always make up a story and say you slid into a tree while on a gnarly trail.

Does your truck have worms? It looks like a dog that has parasites scooting its butt across the carpet. Get it some de-wormer for Gods sake if that's the case because that's just cruelty.

I was going to say the squat is from your girlfriend but that rig ain't a chick magnet in any way, shape, or form. That and she wouldn't fit under the cap.

Also did you have Stevie Wonder put that sticker on? It looks like he put it on straight but it's just randomly put on the window like theres no rhyme or reason to it. It's not in the corner nor along the bottom it's just there. Maybe that's why you didnt see the mailbox while backing up and left a dent on your tailgate.

Did I help make you regret putting pics up?

 

hey man, we only keep my girlfriend in the bed of my truck because she's too heavy to be carried in any domestically available passenger vehicle ...

 

Just because you squat to pee doesn't mean your truck should.

 

Well at least you got a cap to keep her warm and dry. I'm not suspension expert but maybe some add a leafs or air bags to help out the poor rear end. Maybe a Tundra would be a better fit with a setup like this. It should handle the weight a little better. That added head room would be nice.

 

I only squat to pee because my mother told me people would point and laugh if I stood. I assume that's a pretty common thing, thought, right?

 

What’s more hideous the truck or color of the house?

 

Oh the irony here! Roasting someone for using a @SimpleJackFab grille, but then Simple Jack's his own truck with those gaudy ass looking front & rear bumpers on a stock rig. As Simple Jack would say, "This truck makes my eyes rain!"

 

How many caskets can you fit in that thing? I bet you wear a black suit and speak in a low voice.

 

I dont know but maybe you could get a better price at funerals. Just load it up with 2 or 3 and drop them off at there site. It's almost like a ride share.

 

You should see my girlfriend

 

that's why they call it Rock Warrior

 

Tacomas are for people who cant handle being disappointed and have unrealistic expectations a truck should be reliable and fun to drive

Boom! Roasted.....kinda

 

Off you go!

 

High clearance bumper, low clearance tube steps. A match made by someone who looks like:

 

Look mom, I did a chin up, and it only cost me a months salary! Gyms are hard you guys, I do cross fit, see the granny steps? Fuck legs, we don't do that here. Light bars? I guess I can ask my mom first....

 

These are not the Droids you are looking for.

 

Make me cry myself to sleep

 

Make yourself cry, are those fj wheels, or did you spend all of your allowance on that chin up bar? Check out them ebay lights, too bad they didn't illuminate the fact that you parked under a 2 story outhouse, nice ditch lights, won't do you any good pointed upwards like that. Jealous of your neighbors Ford Flex? I would be, tracking mud on the carpet like that....

 

That will teach you not to tailgate septic pump trucks.

 

I laughed. I laughed really hard those were good