WTF - Office Douche Bags

Ok, I'm at the office today and just want to vent/ask question. A have a hand-full of people will literally snap their f-ing necks trying to look into my office on their way walking past. Keep your f-in eyes foward!!! This is what I really want to say, "YO Bob, WTF are you looking at. You do that shit again, and your going to be starring at a size 11. YFI (you f-ing idiot)"

Does this happen to anybody else? If you are the one that looks into everyone's office on the way past, please stop it's annoying.

And YES, I should actually be working right now.

Thanks for listening, I'm better now.

 

talk to them like Red Forman...that'll scare em away. They'll find another route that doesn't invlove passing your office anymore.

 

Same thing here, I want to ask them if i am blocking their view of MY work sometimes. I mean really, if I want you to see something I will call you over. You could also offer a copy of this to read:

 

I had the same complaint when I notice people staring at me in public. I've started to strike up a conversation with people who are looking at me. They don't want to talk to you, they'll realize that if they look at you you'll say something to them, they usually stop looking.

 

Have an idea, gets the point across and would be funny.
Get some light colored fishing line and one of those cat mouse toys.
Hide the mouse and keep the line flat on the carpet or tile. When the line of "on-lookers" walk by let the first one pass, once they turn their head (to look forward again) pull the line. They will jump, scream, roll up, or whatever and then start a chain reaction ( most case jump back sort of like a bowling pins). When it is all said and done, you have done two things, make a joke, plus prove they need to keep their eyes forward.

 

maybe walking by and thinking boy one day i hope to be just like
him????? Naaa that cant be it just kidding

 

Try quoting Fight Club with a twist:


[Stopping the person with your hand…]
[Talking slowly]
Well, I gotta tell you: If I were you, I'd be very, very careful when you look into people’s office like that, because the person who sits there... might be dangerous.

[Gets up from the chair]
And this button-down, Oxford-cloth psycho might just snap, and then stalk from office to office with an Armalite AR-10 carbine gas-powered semi-automatic weapon, pumping round after round into colleagues and co-workers. This might be someone you've known for years. Someone very, very close to you….

 

Actually I do that all the time. Usually I am just staring into space but it so happens that I am looking in the direction of someone else. Doesn't matter they already think Im weird here

 

I love all the responses. I think that I might just show them the youtube clip of Red Foreman that I seen yesterday on the favorite youtube. And I'll say, "If you look into my office one more time... get the point ass?"

The craziness from fightclub would be totally awesome, but would probably get me canned. Maybe I'll do that after I give my 2 weeks someday.

The string in mouse gag would be awesome as well.

What I really, really want to do though is stick my foot up their asses. - RF

 

No, I'm not talking about starring into outerspace but thinking of something else. I'm talking about D-Bags that are walking past, and are looking into my office so hard that it continues long after they are past. Exactly how I would look at a super-hottie at the beach. Sorry, I'm a hypocrite in that instance.

 

shoot rubber bands at them

 

ahhhh ok and +1

 

LMAO - Good one, resort to oldskol tatics. Better yet, sit here with a loaded straw and spit wad. I'll wait for the D-Bag to whip his head around, and BAM. Got you, MO-FO

 

Does anybody else have office douche baggery that they want to bitch about?

 

^^ that works too.

That reminds me, my first job was at a movie theater in the mall. We used to fill our vest pockets with popcorn kernals, and we used the slurpee straws to shoot popcorn seeds at mach 9. It was awesome haha.

 

More Douche Baggery from the office: I send out an email to coordinate a document which was attached in email. On that email, I include a link to our website for more info. I emailed this document to Person A (among others).

Person A forwards the email to Person B (who works in another office and wouldn't know) and asks for the serial number which is listed on the document in the first email. They also ask for our website. Person B sends me an email asking if I know. (Of course I do - I sent original email and built the site).

I reply to Persons A and B with the serial and the link to the website again (which was in first email anyway...)

Person A then emails me back asking what our website is....

In email, reply back to Person A, with "See yellow highlighted text below" and I highlight the original two comments on that from first two emails...

And I have told these folks TWO times before that on two seperate occasions what the website was... Bookmark it asshole!

Complete idiots!! Are you kidding me!!


Another idea: Glue a quarter the the floor outside your door with a lil Gorilla Glue.

 

I remember once my father got a new office with a tilting window above his door. Whenever he left to do something he'd open the window, lock the door and blast "It's a Small World After All" on his computer.

Might want to try that

 

My office has that one way mirror glass.... It's fun!