Roast my Tacoma! (2nd gen edition)

Tell me you're a boomer, w/o actually telling me you're a boomer.

I see that instead of refurbishing or replacing those hazy headlights you've decided instead for night time driving to just simply rely on the reflective light bouncing off all your front end chrome from oncoming traffic. Ballsy, I'll give you that, but I'm guessing for a hardened WWII vet like yourself you haven't even given this a second thought. Legend.

Nothing says "Maaco Paint Job on a Tacoma" more than paint matched rubber trim strips on all the wheel fender flares.

 

You don’t know how right you are. Parents decided they wanted to surprise me with getting some body work done and getting the truck repainted so they took it to MAACO. That turned into a whole fiasco that I’ve posted about before. 3k down the drain and they messed up the body line on the rear bedside panel. You can see it if you zoom in on the taillight on the first picture. But at least my truck now looks like a red fishing lure.

 

You: "Hey everyone! Here's a picture I took at 1 AM of my blacked out Taco parked in a cave. Don't hold back!"


Also You:

 

Good Lord in Heaven almighty, has your grandma seen what you're doing with your life? That chin up bar is worse than the brace face you tried to kiss in 7th grade. Nice paint job there shooter, looking to win best of show at the pinewood derby? Who needs headlights when you drive a Bronco Escape because you're embarrassed about your Taco. Let's talk about that bed cap.... Wait here's an idea, let not since you'll probably transfer it to the new Colorado you're getting. As bad as those are, it'll still look better than your knock off hot wheels here, holy fuck look at that plastic cladding and trim.... Hope it doesnt melt in the sun with all of that chrome reflecting heat. Your civic club called, they'd like a word about bodywork embarrassment to the community. You wanna know what the best part about this flaming heap of poor midlife crisis decisions is?

The ducks.

 

Oh no, I’m keeping my taco, I’m gonna drive this thing until it falls apart (if that ever happens). I do wish Toyota would give us a diesel though, the Colorado has that and ZR2 going for it

 

The Italian diesel in the Colorado isnt worth a 3 legged pig, and the overpriced ZR2 performs just as well.... At least it looks good.

 

3 pedals, 75k, stock

 

TBF it’s hard to roast a stock truck since there’s no mods to make fun of yet, the only thing I can really say is it must suck to be a poor since you can’t afford any mods

 

14 years old with only 75k miles and a manual? I shall call your truck “Blue Balls” because it needs to be driven.

 

I picked it up 6 months ago, added nearly 10k miles since then. It enjoys the $4.20 a gallon, always begging for more

 

I cant roast a Plain Jane Taco let alone another sweet Speedway Blue Metallic truck

 

can’t drive it due to yellow fogged headlights

 

Yeah I saw but on account of my own headlights I’m not allowed to comment.

 

Looks so good. Can’t believe you’re from Florida! So weird!

 

Ben, you gushing over it is the biggest foul-mouthed roast move on this thread. You’re inverse of the taste police. Ease up a little on this poor guy!

 

Noooo I cannot do that! No mercy!

 

Lemme see whatcha got!

 

Is your driver side door closed or is it just screwed up?

 

The flex wouldnt let the door close but this is how i got it

 

somehow looks better that way than a normal second gen.