50+ thread

Sounds like "someone" is CYA'ing and trying to retain their man-card status after a bit too much Internet sharing.

 

Morning all

Took mine off, they don't pay me to advertise.

 

Good Morning

It feels a little BRrrrrrrr inside the house this morning , t -stat shows 64° . Looks like i'll be turning the heater on soon !!! , Maybe by the end of next month ????

 

I'll try to answer some of your questions because there are some other nuances to the story. We have attempted to invite them to lunch probably 10 times since quarantine lifted in Aug 2020 to no avail. I have tried calling but she doesn't answer her phone, communication has been limited to text and I'm not getting into this over a text. And have we done anything to them ? No, but I have a theory. As I said before, we spent 10 years and tons of money on chasing the parenthood dream. Around the time that our son was born she confided in me (because we used to be very close) that they were trying for child #2 but it wasn't happening. She was fully aware of all of our un-successful fertility treatments but fertility treatments is what finally worked for us so I suggested that she see our doctor. So they got a consultation but she said that her husband wasn't on board with any of it, and she also mentioned the cost. We're in our early 50's and we still live in an apartment because of the path we chose (which we're fine with), whereas they're in real estate and own several homes and they also spent quarantine moving into a larger home (that we've never been invited to). So perhaps seeing us with our son is a reminder to them that they very easily could have at least tried fertility treatments, which is totally unfair and kind of bizarre considering how they were initially very happy for us. Or maybe we're just not Ken & Barbie enough for them and their fancy new life. I think that one of the things that prevents me from saying anything to them is because I feel that most wealthier people always feel that the rest of us are all too quick to play the victim card, but for me it definitely has nothing to do with jealousy, getting the cold shoulder from a dear friend has just been a very strange twist in a beautiful journey. BTW, my sincere apologies for turning this into a soap opera, I never came here for a soap opera either but getting this out of my brain has already helped.

 

Wait,No, well maybe

 

Ok so you extended to them. That changes everything.

Dump Them and don’t look back.

It’s obviously their problem and nothing you did.
Goodbye

 

So sayeth the Grumpster!

 

Unlike the other "Grumpy Mike" here, I'm not quite my father yet, so my response is a little less grumpy. But anyway here's my take.

These people are obviously important to you, or we wouldn't be having this discussion. I would give it one more try to communicate with them to see why they have distanced themselves from you. They might view it, that you snubbed them first, and you are just unaware that it happened. It may have been something that happened that can be rectified, or maybe not. As they are not open to regular communication, I think you have two options. 1) drop by unannounced to see your friend and discuss the matter; I would be blunt about why you're there and how you feel. 2) Being text is the only communication they have responded to. Send them a message and ask bluntly and outright why they no longer want to associate with you. It might be along text message, but hopefully, it will spur a conversation and you can find out why they have chosen to distance themselves. You should be prepared that they may not respond. If they don't respond or do respond in a negative fashion, then you should follow Grumpy Mike's advice and move on with your life and not look back knowing you did what you could to salvage the friendship.

Sometimes people do just grow apart. I can count on one hand the number of friends I have today that have been in my life for 20+ years. So the handful that meet that qualification are important to me, and I make an effort to keep the friendship connected.

 

So a friend just sent me this while I was typing the previous message.

 

Afternoon folks,

We are having so MUCH FUN in Florida today... 30Mph winds gusting to 45MPH and it's still coming..



Everybody be safe!!

RJ

 

Not to worry, it'll be a TS by the time it gets over you.




























Until then, keep your head down.

 

Mike 's NOT Grumpy...just ask him.

 

Thanks Andy ... finally checked our mailbox.

pardon the mud specks ... dog manages to get that stuff everywhere out to the cabin this time of year.

 

I'm too scared...

 

This is pretty unusual. I almost never see all of my cats sleeping in the same place.



EDIT: and this picture almost makes it look like I have a cat with two heads.

 

Oh yeah Andy , talk to Baby Sister ... she put us there in TW.

 

Look what showed up in the mail today !!


Thanks Andy

 

I got to thinking about this and I want you to know I run things around this house!!