Whatever

She has a small mouth till you move her in.

 

Hello and

Gnite

 

Did you ever deal with somebody that is so stupid that you’re at a loss for words? My wife dropped her car off at Firestone to get the tires rotated and oil changed and they sent her an estimate for over 1000.00. Brakes, rotors, alignment and 2 new tires that they were “pro rating” She told them to call me and explain it to me and that I would okay them to do all of the work. She immediately called me and sent me the estimate. They must have called my phone 15 times today but I didn’t answer. When we got home from work, we hopped in the taco for a sneak attack. I walked in and some dirty slob was standing there. I said, I’m here for our Civic. He said, which one? I said “How many you have back there? He said, “I don’t know”. Here’s the rest:
Me: well let’s have a look.
Manager: oh wait, the Honda. I was thinking of something else.
Me: so… you’re the manager huh?
Manager:yup
Me: can you manage to ring up the oil change and get me the car?
Manager:I was waiting for you to call
Me: well you still are but I did you one better. How much do I owe you?
Manager:can you authorize us to do the work that we quoted?
Me: what work?
Manager: the work we quoted
Me: so what do I owe you for the oil change?
Manager:but we quoted the other work too
Me: you keep saying that but I don’t know what you mean.
Manager: I told your wife that you need other work done
Me: ohhhhh. Yeah well she told me to tell you to go fuck your self but I’m much too nice to say that to you. Now get my car.

 

Solid tack! Would you have done the same at the Audi dealership when they wanted to shove that huge German sausage in yer ass?

 

That wasn’t all. They killed the battery and didn’t have a chance to charge it yet. As for the Audi-Nope. I paid them and then sold it.

 

What part of no don’t you understand. Idjit!

 

I'm cultivating eyebrow and nose hair for transplant to my head so I don't cut either one. Bumper crop so far.

 

Dafuq? Didja take it to a Honda dealer or a Hodaka dealer???

 

Firestone where she bought the tires.

 

They are scraping the bottom for help. This guy was the scummiest, most unkempt mo’fucka I’ve seen have a job in a long time.

 

Those slimy service writers are scum. I worked for many. Some had a real flair for detecting weakness and then dive bombing the poor people. I pissed off a couple junior service writers because I wrote “NOT NEEDED AT THIS TIME” on the RO.
Now timing belts on the other hand…

 

Cool! How’s your ear crop this year? I could braid mine if I didn’t shave it.

 

I’m still shaking my head. He’s lucky I didn’t pull the old “stick my finger down my throat while I’m pretend coughing and puke all over his little desk.”

 

Ah. The quintessential morass of slime.

 

Lucky? Yeah. I thought you would give him a Cuban neck tie

 

I’m gettin old.

 

Tighten up yer gear man! Launch the spinnaker!

 

Somebody fart? This dump is dead!

 

Coming along nicely. This is the look in shooting for...