Convince Son Not To Lift 2023 Tacoma Off Road

Thanks for link, a lot of good info.

 

Post of the Day ..

 

Sorry OP - You are super supportive and looking out for your son... Unfortunately it sounds like the son is an A$$...

He should be grateful that he has a new truck to get to work - since he did not *like* going to school... (la di da...)

I hope the good paying job for an 18 year old will support growth (with his focus hard work!) so it can be a good paying job when he is older and has additional obligations... - but that is another issue.

He should be focused on paying FULL rent and every penny should go to paying off YOU and the truck. (I would be very bothered to be in that position...)

A 6" lift is just stupid. Cancel and get your warranty money back asap.

- I would sell the truck back and let him buy an old little honda he can afford and get his butt to work by driving AROUND potholes instead of thinking about dumb ways to destroy the value of a vehicle he is FAR from owning... while moching rent and no doubt food from his parents...

I'm a bit sensitive to these attitudes as I have a few nephews that are about the same caliber...

 

I don't think its really about the lift or truck. Its about money. Gonna be hard to convince a kid who gets most things handed to them the value of an investment. I would have said find something other than a brand new vehicle to give a college dropout, like a $3k beater, and let him lift and abuse it, to ultimately learn the meaning of value, but I think the damage is already done. My vote is Dad wears the pants and a kid at any age respects dad's rules in dad's house; its your financial obligation to protect the investment, and if he doesn't like it, he's more than welcome to refinance solo at an incredibly high interest rate and take out his own higher insurance on it. If he wants Dad's help, he plays by Dad's rules. Its not a show of dominance, its a parental responsibility to teach values.

If you'd rather keep it more civil, and you'd rather encourage the behavior of (potential) reckless spending for the sake of building a truck you both can appreciate, maybe you both make a compromise? Point him in a better direction, towards a 3" lift and slightly larger tires with some supporting mods. It'll surely out perform a tooted stance truck on oversized lawnmower wheels.

 

I saw an older Taco driving home yesterday, it was lifted where door sill was 5 feet off the ground with stock wheels and tires- super dangerous to drive, guess he was waiting on the wheels. We used to have what they called a RECON permit (reconstruction permit from State of Hawaii) that was needed when you did truck suspension mods- Son tells me that has been done away with and now anything goes- we are short 300 police officers on the Island of Oahu, so not many police on the road to stop unsafe or illegal vehicles, so we basically self police.

 

Haha, I'm 19, so I get it.

But seriously, a 2 inch lift is great on these trucks. Makes them look great and also still perform good on the road.

 

I don’t really think OP has done anything wrong. He helped his kid buy a truck.
What I think OP should do is expect the payment to be made on time, all the time. I also wouldn’t help him do anything to the truck. Installing a “6 lift yourself isn’t any fun. Paying someone else is going to be expensive. So are wheels and tires. The boy will learn, you just have to let him learn on his own.
Either way, he’ll learn what hard work is.
Work hard to pay others to fix the stuff you break. Or work hard to fix the stuff you break on your own.

 

19...your probably gettin all them Hot Canadian girls.

 

Dating a nurse student who also skates and loves trucks I credit the Tacoma, I am one ugly SOB. I don't think we've taken her car anywhere, in the whole 6 months I've known her

 

This is an excellent teachable moment. The truck is not his. He needed you to cosign, so if he doesn't pay you are on the hook. If he messes it up or wrecks it, you are on the hook with him. That means you can 100% say, sorry, but you don't get to gamble with/spend other people's money. I know, shocking for the state you are in, but that's how it's supposed to be.

Tell him flat out "No. You didn't get it on your own, and even if you had that truck is NOT yours until you pay it off. That means you don't get to mess it up. Once you make the last payment and have the title in hand, then and only then can you do whatever you want with it. Welcome to being an adult. All the freedom to do what you want also comes with a bunch of responsibility. If you want to mess it up while it's got a lien on it you need to refinance it into your name only without a cosigner."

 

More info, when we bought the truck he put $10K down (money he has made from working since he was 14 years old) and he is making the $750 monthly payments auto pay from his checking account for 4 year loan. And with his current union job he is making more than me (I am a mechanical engineer not to far from retirement) and probably has a better job future with his current company that I have had in my past career. He is paying all insurance cost. I could charge him rent, but he does not waste money and works hard, treats others with respect so I see no need, rather him to save for a house one day (BTW- a starter house in Hawaii is about $1 million, so parents here try to help their kids any way they can). Also, the covid lock down really screwed a lot of teenagers up- even as far as suicide, again, I try to support where it is needed without codling. His friend bought a used honda and a month later it needed a $6,000 transmission. Used car prices in Hawaii are very high, used Taco can be close to price of new. As I said, he needs a reliable truck to get to his job so he can make money to pay existing and future bills.

 

Yeah,i would stick with the truck ...usually if its a small car ,you cant get past 3rd base anyway

 

I got my own house for that

 

I doubt you'll persuade him of anything. But as the cosigner on the lien, put your foot down on there being no major modifications on the vehicle until the loan is paid off. You can maybe make exceptions for new tires and a tonnneau cover. And - if you must - a small lift once the warranty is expired. But until the loan is gone, that's where money should go.

 

Guys and Gals, My post was concerning at Taco and a lift. Not how to raise my kids. And if you got a problem how I raise my teenage kids just know this, Kids do not do drugs (18 year of had to pass drug test and background check for the job he got, and was the youngest person to ever be hired by this large publicaly traded company), party, daughter has not gotten pregnant, both kids were/are honor students in high school and enjoyed playing sports. Kids take care of their health and play outside. Son body boards North Shore Oahu, some of the most dangerous breaks on earth. And as I said, kids made it through the BS Covid lock down and all the other BS covid rules that we "responsible adults" forced on them. So stick to the Taco lift and if you don't like my parenting methods then FO.

 

Depending on his financial situation, with a $750 monthly truck payment, adding cash-paid beater he can work on and lift as high as he wants might be a good option.

 

I haven't read all the posts, but I don't think anyone was critiquing your parenting in any posts I saw? You asked for ways to dissuade your kid, and you were given options and info. What you do with it, and your kid, is 100% up to you.

 

Don’t take it personal. Unsolicited personal advice is a side effect of posting a question to a forum of strangers.

 

I know where you are coming from.
You don’t have to defend yourself or your kid. I seen the direction this thread was headed when some said your kid “sounded like and asshole”.
And as a parent , you defended your kid.

I’d suggest that you take what information you have gotten this far, and use it to make a decision. I also would not come back to this thread. It won’t get any better. Trust me, I’ve been here awhile. It will only get uglier until mid locks the thread.

Best of luck to you and your kid.