PennSilverTaco's "Perfect 5-Lug Regular Cab" Build, Aspergers, and General BS MegaThread!

I went to my first open casket in November 2007 at the age of 18. My grandpa on my dad’s side had lung cancer and passed at 71. I was a pallbearer.

I knew my grandpa had been sick for a while and everybody knew what was coming. When I saw him for the last time, he was in a casket and the funeral home had done such a great job that you’d think he was sleeping.

I have been to numerous open caskets since then, the most recent being in February 2024. It was for a former teacher’s son who died in a car crash when he was only 21 years old.

Once again, those bodies had all been prepared by professionals to look as though they were merely sleeping. The sight of a dead body at a funeral does not bother me in the slightest, even if it is somebody I knew.

What I saw on Saturday night, I would not wish on worst enemy. Amanda has a sixth sense of sorts, and as soon as she said she had a bad a feeling, I literally said “Fuck it. Get in the truck.”

Not only was I driving in a nasty thunderstorm with torrential rain, but I broke a couple laws on the way there. If we were pulled over, I figured we had a pretty damn good excuse for speeding and possibly running a red light.

I say again that if this had been the body of somebody I didn’t know personally, it likely would not have affected me as much as it has. Also, as I said before, Amanda and I cut off contact with Emily for about a year because she was very unpredictable at times and could be a bitch. I called her an “ungrateful bitch” once via text message and once to her face on two separate occasions after losing my temper with her due to her disrespectful and often vulgar behavior. I regret this now.

Again, I would not wish what I saw on my worst enemy. The scene was not particularly gory, even after emergency personnel flipped on the lights, but as soon as they did come on I knew in the bottom of my heart that Emily had departed this earth several hours before we showed up. I was hoping that the cop or one of the medics would come out and say that Emily had a faint pulse and was just barely alive, but that they would take her to the hospital and could likely bring her back.

I missed this, but Amanda saw clearly the cop attempting to move Emily’s head; Amanda tells me that Emily’s head kind of rolled lifelessly to the side, and she knew Emily was dead. Again, I missed this.

With regards to how Emily looked before the lights went on, she looked like she either asleep, or unconscious but still alive. When the lights came on, it was obvious that something was very wrong. Emily’s skin was very pale, while at the same time her skin had a yellowish tint to it. There were brown spots on her feet and other lower extremities, which based on my limited knowledge of what happens to the body after death, I believe was blood pooling in the lowest areas of her body since the blood was obviously no longer circulating.

The autopsy was performed on either Sunday or Monday, and the medical examiner informed Emily’s dad that there was no obvious cause of death (heart attack, liver failure, etc). It has been 11 weeks since Amanda’s birth mother was found and we still don’t have a cause of death. They seem to be really strict about not revealing everything until all of the reports are back, so we are sticking by our theory that Emily had a seizure brought on by a bad interaction between two medications (prednisone and Wellbutrin) and aspirated her vomit. Based on the position her body was in, a seizure seems incredibly likely.

 

OP - Sorry you had to go through this.

Thanks for taking the dog. You stepped up man.

 

Emily’s dad and his girlfriend spent the better part of a day clearing out Emily’s condo, and on Monday evening called us to tell us that he’d left a plastic bin of Hannah’s stuff on the front patio for us. Rolling up on Emily’s condo less than 48 hours after finding her there didn’t affect either of us like we thought it would. However, Emily had a lot of issues and lived in squalor (at least in my opinion, and I will freely admit that I am a bit of a slob). What you see here is all of the stuff that Emily’s dad and his girlfriend left curbside for the garbage truck to pick up today. The Taco is obviously mine, and the white Outlander Sport was Emily’s. If you look directly across the parking lot between my truck and Emily’s Mitsubishi, you will see a white Dodge Durango backed into a parking space. That Durango is the patrol vehicle of the detective who lives across the parking from Emily’s building and investigated the scene…

 

Easily one of Emily’s favorite songs ever…

 

Picture of Amanda and Emily at a car show we went to in March 2023…

 

Amanda and I didn’t get back to my house with Hannah until about 12:30am, and I believe it was about 2am when I got to sleep. I didn’t get a lot of sleep, and I was waking up every hour just about, afraid I’d see a dead body in my room. I still have vivid images of Emily’s body, but the anxiety about sleeping in a dark bedroom at night has subsided; I slept very well last night.

Amanda is getting a little bit better, but she was diagnosed with PTSD at a fairly young age due to stuff that happened long before we even knew each other. Seeing somebody who was her best friend for the better part of two decades really triggered her PTSD, and she will no doubt be needing some specialized therapy.

We have absolutely no regrets about driving to her house to check on her, because we likely found her less than a day after she passed.

 

At the age of 10 I remember seeing my best friend my neighbor, strapped to a gurney being carried out. It was pretty crazy. I can still see his slick back hair, bouncing up and down With the oxygen mask over his face like the underoath cover am 35 now. I remember not shedding a tear, not even really understanding what had happened but the older I get the more vivid becomes. Cheers op. Play lots of video games, preferably nonviolent most likely Mario kart.

 

A picture of me, Emily, and her horse Declan from way back in May 2010; Declan died of old age a few years ago, and we like to think that Emily crossed the rainbow bridge with him and her dog Boomer…

 

Another pic of Emily that I took at the same car show back in March 2023…

 

Charlie, just came across this thread. Sorry for the loss of your friend and please tell Amanda my condolences as well. I'm just going to echo some of what's already been said. Both of you should seek out professional help. You've both suffered a trauma that won't pass easily or quickly and it should be addressed sooner rather than later. It's good of you to take in her dog. Do your best to show her some love and comfort as she's suffered a loss just as you and Amanda have.

 

Amanda and I have talked to my longtime psychologist; I talk to him every two weeks regardless of what's going on, I called him on Sunday morning, and we had a zoom call with him yesterday morning. My therapist is going to help Amanda find a therapist who can help her deal with this, and I feel like he will be able to help me for the time being.

 

Was a shade after 2 I think was when we was texting..I debated texting that time of night but you had just posted so I figured worst case you see it later.

 

More old pics from the May 2010 trip to the horse barn…

 

Emily’s first car was a 2003 or 2004 Ford Taurus, which she was still driving in 2010; here, we see her with both of her “rides”…

 

Went back to Emily’s condo today at the request of her dad, to bring in the garbage cans so he won’t get fined by the HOA. Emily’s condo is circled in red, including the window through which I saw Emily on the couch. The front door is just out of sight to the right of the window. The garbage cans I brought in are visible to the right of Emily’s condo. Rolling up to this place is eerie to me and outright anxiety-inducing to Amanda; I hope we never see this place again, honestly…

 

I hit 218K on Friday, and missed the moment…

 

I forgot to post this. As I said before, one of the paramedics kicked in the door, which destroyed the frame. Somehow, they were able to piece the frame back together and lock it using the deadbolt…

 

It's good that you're talking about this, both online and to your psychologist. And it's pretty natural to feel guilty about recent "not great" interactions. But by your actions of going to check on her instantly, it shows that you and your girlfriend are really good friends.

I highly recommend remembering the good times and bringing them up with friends and your girlfriend. My ex-wife was murdered and one thing that I did do right with my sons is always keeping her memory alive and freely discussing her. I think that was really healthy for my sons and myself. Sorry for your loss and take care of yourself.

 

What prompted us hop in the Tacoma on Saturday night and drive over to Emily's condo in a severe thunderstorm was the recent death of Amanda's birth mother (in February), who died in her apartment and was not found for about five days. Amanda's mother lived about an hour from us, and Amanda had not been on the greatest terms with her mother. Amanda and I called her mother the day she was found dead, but we didn't find out about it until the next day. We did not find the body that time, which is probably good, because neighbors who were there said that there was a noticeable odor of death when the door was kicked in. Emily's apartment is only 15 minutes from my house, so we went.

We were not expecting to find Emily dead, but we knew something was wrong, and we didn't think she deserved to rot for days if she was in fact dead. Hannah (the dog) was another major factor in our decision to drive there. We are pretty sure she was gone for less than a day, as the last known person to text with her was her ex-boyfriend on Friday, and we found her at like 8:35pm on Saturday. However, she was in rigor according to the first responders. It had been in the 80s for the last few days, and the fact that Emily had the central A/C on likely preserved her body. Emily seemed to be chronically cold, and she and Amanda would get into arguments when they lived together, because Emily wanted the heat on when most people would turn on the A/C!

 

The image of Emily on the couch after the first responders turned on the lights is still vivid as ever, but I find myself able to talk about it and keep my composure. I don't think I will ever be able to forget seeing Emily through that window, but the flashbacks have gotten less intense. I was listening to "Dead Ringer for Love", a duet by Meat Loaf and Cher, in the truck when we rolled up to Emily's apartment. I still love that song and have listened to it once since Saturday night. When we drove up to Emily's condo, I just jumped up out of the truck and left it running, including Meat Loaf blasting. Because the truck was running, my dashcam was rolling, and it captured damn near everything. If I had parked to the left of Emily's car instead of to the right, my dashcam would have gotten a much clearer view of Emily's patio and window. Unfortunately, or perhaps fortunately, Meat Loaf drowned out Amanda and me screaming Emily's name upon seeing her on the couch. However, you still know when we started screaming, because you can see a light come on in the condo directly above Emily's and a woman come to the sliding door. Again, because I was parked to the right of Emily's car, my dashcam only got a sliver of Emily's patio. However, you can see me going to flag down the police, as well as the police and medics following me up to the front door.

You cannot see the firefighter kick the front door in, but you can see the light come on in Emily's window. This is the moment that mine and Amanda's lives changed, likely forever. You can also see me coming back to the truck, clearly in shock, after the cop told us that Emily was gone. The cop actually came out to the parking lot before me and can be seen talking into his radio as he walks back to his SUV. I went back to the truck to call our friend Helen, who now lives in Texas and is like a grandmother to us, while Amanda stayed on the patio. One of the EMS guys told Amanda that they had done a 12-point EKG on Emily, and that she was in full rigor.

More dashcam footage shows the cop coming up to my truck asking for mine and Amanda's licenses so he can get our info in case the detective needed to contact us later; Meat Loaf stopped playing when I took my phone out of the truck to call 911 and disconnected the Bluetooth, but you still can't really hear anything because it was raining, the windshield wipers were going, and the A/C was on in the truck. After probably not even 15 minutes, I shut off the truck so I wouldn't waste gas, and this obviously cut power to the dashcam. At some point, I moved my truck to another spot so the coroner's van could park in the spot I had been in.