Carolina Alliance

after u get the off-road equipment installed, demand more. tell them you want free oil changes, car washes and a vending machine

 

Stripper pole in the bed with a plush leather couch and half of the bed made into a beer cooler! These are my demands and will not settle for less. Second thought after the trials by mud could include some mud wrestling next to the pole and couch!

 

Why would I want a vending machine? I want a beer dispensing fountain.

 

vending machine to bring to the alliance meeting, filled with pretzels and my truck will be the beer truck remember?

 

I like the idea of a stripper pole. I'm gonna jump on the market with that idea

 

this sounds like a fun trip

 

I can see the commercial now.... "Tired of giving strippers money just to have them stay at the club when you leave? Well now you can take them on the road with you! Introducing the "Strip-O-Matic Mobile Stripper Pole!"

Then the actual commercial will have footage of a hot chick trying to dance on a pole in the bed of a truck doing 70mph down the interstage while getting bugs in the face and 18 wheelers honking at her. The guy driving can be throwing dollar bills out of the sliding window of the cab and they blow away before she catches them. I should be in marketing

I think we have ourselves a serious product here....

 

The fine print "The Strip-O-Matic Corp. is not responsible for the loss or death of any of the strippers in your collection. This product was only intended for the use in a parked position. There is a weight restriction on the pole of 110lbs. So fat drunk guy stay off and enjoy the show. All sales are final with no available return. Stripper not included. Availability to buy strippers are based on income and willingness to flash it around to get their attention. This has been a message from the Strip-O-Matic Corp."

 

The absurdity level of this site has reached a new height. That's the funniest thing I've read here.

 

sounds to me like a great product

 

if you think this sites absurd you should hang out with me for a weekend. I gurantee you'll never be the same again....

 

A weekend with you? You should be locked up in solitary confinement in a zoo, you freak. You are a spoilt, belligerent psychopath under the influence on alcohol suffering from anti social personality disorder.

Why anybody would want to hang out with you, I just cannot comprehend.

 

thats because he is from canada

 

Easy there canadian bacon, that one sentence describes ALL of my closest friends.

 

..........i couldnt have said it better myself!!!

oh, and toy4life.....the canadian bacon comment was great!!!

 

Thank you, tacomaman. I thought it fit in nicely.

 

Whats your point? Were you going somewhere with that or are you just stating facts?

 

I didn't write this but he makes some educated and common sense points.

7 reasons why Canda sucks:

Canada is cold.

Real cold. Too cold for anyone sensible.

But Canadians should prepare for warmer temperatures, since those Godless socialist pinko cowards will suffer an eternity in Hell.

The metric system.
Those Canadians practically invented this "metric" system bullshit. Somehow it's like inches and feet, only it doesn't make any damn sense. And kilometers? Don't even get me started on those.

Next thing you know they'll have metric months, metric dollar bills, and women will have metric breasts. Where will the madness end?

Canada gained independence from England in 1982.
1982! Can you believe that? Practically yesterday. We told those British popinjays to take a hike over 200 years before those lazy Canucks got around to it.

And guess who still has the queen on their currency? I'll give you a hint: Canada.

Rich people must pay for health care for lazy bums.
Imagine being coerced into paying for health care for undserving lazy scaramouches who sit on the street corner day after day, chugging down a 40oz Mickeys before noon.

Those cretins don't deserve a nickel, let alone expensive medical treatment paid for by wealthy, upstanding members of society.

Fact: If you're poor, it's entirely your damn fault -- and you deserve a short miserable life of pain and suffering.

They have oil.
Come on, Canada. Give us your damn oil. Who do you think makes your cars, anyway? Manitoba isn't exactly Detroit, if you know what I mean.

Don't make us go Iraq on your ass. We'll do it.

I'm serious.

They speak French.
Okay, I know what you're going to say. "But O Wrinkly, only Canadians in Quebec speak French!"

Well be that as it may, Canadians still write in French all over the damn place. Street signs, documents, businesses...

If I ever saw a coffee shop with a sign that said "ferme" in the window instead of "closed," I'd blow that place up before those Satan-worshiping French terrorists spread their hate any further.

Draft dodgers.
And this is the big one. Where do you think those America-hating draft dodgers run off to when the going gets tough?

You're damn right they go to that God-forsaken hellhole known as Canada. Look, we're making the world safe for you hippie clinchpoops, so show some damn respect.

There you have it folks -- seven indesputible reasons Canada sucks. Of course, everyone is entitled to his or her own opinion. But if it's different than mine, it's wrong.

 

haha! Thats classic!!! I love the quote "Don't make us go Iraq on your ass!" haha, stupid Canadians....

 

That's one of the best on this site.