Friends as Roommates

I have a dilemma that I need help with. This may be a lengthy read so i apologize in advance. Here we go.

I'm in my second year in college and own the house I'm living in. I live here with two friends from high school. However, one of my roommates has been my best friend since i was young and unfortunately, hes starting to suck at life. He's failed out 3 semesters in a row so the school kicked him out for good. Upon discussion with his family (really fucked up too) his mom said he could stay here for this semester as long as he got a job and paid rent. Well two months have passed and I think he has left the house like 3 times. After a lot of bitching for rent his mom finally paid it for him and said he has to get a job and pay for rent. Well I know exactly whats gonna happen....rents due on the first, I'll ask him for it, he'll get snappy and say "if i had the money i'd pay but i don't so quit asking." I'm in such a dilemma cause this is my best friend and he never used to be like this. So unfortunately I have to kick him out, and I have no idea of how to do it.


TL;DR:

My best friend is my roommate and he won't pay rent. I have to kick him out (my dumbass trusted him and didn't make him sign a lease so no law help here) and I don't know how to without losing our friendship.

So how about it guys, what would you do?

 

be honest and tell him you can't afford to support the two of you. give him a couple weeks and try and be around when he's moving out. i've lost silverware, computer parts, etc. from departing housemates.

 

its a tough one.........................but just tell him straight up............you gotta pay or get out man!!! shit aint free!! if he is a true friend, he'll understand, and even though you two may have a bit of a skirmish for a bit, he'll wise up and know you did what you had to do.

 

That's just the thing, with the way hes been lately, If i tell him early he'll hold a grudge on me like I've wronged him and probably start to steal things while i'm at class....

 

Talk to him, tell him that he is your friend and all, but he need to pay for stuff, no one out in the world will help him... so he needs to understand that..... when it comes to money, business is business... I've been fucked by some friends, but as I always do, put friendship aside.... talk to him as his landlord....

 

Not saying you should do it, but the reason banks and courts give people three days to move out and send the sheriff over is because of just that...vengeful people.

lock up all your easily moved valuables. get a camera and take pics of everything while he is there, carry around a notepad and list things valuable. tell him it is because your insurance wants them for any possible future claims (tell a self-protecting fib). that might make him a little weary of what (if anything) he takes.

 

yeah. i'll just feel like an ass. I guess I need to just man up and confront him about it. May drink one or two before hand. nothing like that liquid confidence.

 

Does anybody know what legal rights, if any, I have over him being that he's living in my house without a lease?

 

I don't know man.... he didn't signed a lease, but also he is not paying you rent.... so IMO I think you can kick him out....

 

From the sounds of this, your friend is sucking at friendship as much as he's sucking at life. Any idea what caused this turn in him?

 

yeah, This is how i've been planning the conversation:

me: "hey man, are you gonna have the money to pay me on the first?"
him: "if i have a job, quit bothering me about it"
me: "i hate to do this, but if you don't plan on paying me by the first then you need to have your stuff out by the first"
him: "whatever"

and he'll sit there and wait and the first will roll around and half his shit will still be here, thus leaving me fucked for another month.

 

I wish i knew. I worked last semester as an intern and i got back here to find him partied out of college. he's not even smoking or drinking anymore and he's still sour.

 

I agree with the rest of the people on here. Be upfront with him that he needs to earn his keep.

I have lost a few friends that sound similar to your friend but its part of life that people change or don't grow up.

 

i guess thats what it is mainly....he won't grow up. He still does shit like, i saw him break the oven by dropping a pan on the heating element. next day he was like somebody broke the oven. When i accused him he got all defensive and denied everything.

 

he kinda sounds like napoleon dynamite!

 

yeah. but hes not like that at all. He's 5'3" (says he's 5'6"), random as fuck, pedantic, and cocky. I personally am starting to think he's extremely insecure and bossing people around and talking about how good he is at things is just his way of making himself feel better.

 

thats what it sounds like to me man. and just to say, but even someone you have been friends with for years may not end up being your friend later in life..........and now is a good time to test them waters.

 

yeah. i hate growing up....i find myself saying "damn, my parents were right again" more and more.

 

i'm surprised delmarva hasn't posted in here yet.

 

It's going to be important for you to follow through with whatever you tell him you're gonna do. Otherwise, he will just keep taking advantage.