Gfs dad is being abusive. I need Help!

This.

 

Your telling me. Drama all the time. I date young girls for some reason and I dont know why. It just always happens that way. I thought about leaving her but I cant do that. I love her so much and she loves me. I guess this is a bump in the road and we need to fix it.

 

OP -How long have you been dating this girl

Also as i read back over this the Dad is just being verbally abusive, correct? not physically?

 

true, i agree 100%. Now, i'm going to play devils advocate but it sounds to me like more of a dramatic YOUNG girlfreind.

If in 19 years it has not been physical, why would it start now...Which begs the question, How long have you been dating this girl?

 

It's gonna be a year in aguast and yes just yelling. No touching or hitting yet.

 

SO at this point i would say you should know this girl pretty well, and if she hasn't always been like this then i would say shes not the dramatic type. But she is a young girl, living under her parent's roof and maybe she doesn't like everything they have to say. She is old enough to make a grown up decision and move out, or move in with a friend or anything she can do to get away from that situation if she truely wants to. She has to make that call. I've been in your shoes before, unfortunately there isn't anything you can do untill she is ready.

 

Been there done that bro. I've dated a couple chicks that were drama. I bailed QUICK. It doesn't get better. If you can get her away from her family, it might get better but that abuse will shine through in one way or another. You are young and should be in a fun care-free relationship. Period.

 

Couldn't have said this better myself

also x2

 

Hopefully she never reads this ^^^^

Nonetheless remove her from the harmful environment if you care and can trust her in your house.

 

Wow. Some incredibly stupid advice in this thread. There's no physical abuse, so cops can't do a thing. Violence in response to simple arguing will land you in jail, with her out looking for another boyfriend (hopefully less aggressive) while you're gone.

The words above are the key. She doesn't get along with him. As the old saying goes, it takes two to argue. She's nineteen, well old enough to leave home. If she doesn't, it's because she doesn't want to. She's evidently comfortable with the situation, including the arguing - which she likely instigates as much as he.

Anyway, it's not your job to fix the problem, especially when she doesn't want to. Anything you say (about the father, family, etc) will likely come back to haunt you later. Anything you do will be seen (by the family, police, etc) as the actions of an outsider (ignorant of the whole story), viewed far more harshly then you probably intended. Offer your quiet support, but stay out of it beyond that. Let her (as a free, intelligent, adult) make the choices.

 

Can't she afford a room (or even shared room) in an all girls apartment?

My wife (girlfriend at the time) had to move out at age 18 and found some nice but affordable places to live with. I helped her out the best I could financially, but we made it work. (I stayed at my parents house to be better able to help her).

Just doing a quick CL search I see rooms in Boston for around $290 a month.
http://boston.craigslist.org/gbs/roo/3063634099.html

Moving out can be more affordable than you think. If she is working she can probably afford it. And if she is in school, there are probably additional loan programs she could use to pay rent. Normally I'd say avoid loans, but in this case it may be a good option...

And as other posters have said, don't fight the guy. If you truly love this girl you'll probably have to deal with her parents for a long term.

I didn't take my own advice and had a messy situation where cops got involved. I didn't end up having a normal relationship with the girlfriend's parents for a few years. Luckily we all get along fine now...

Good luck.

 

Sounds like the Dad needs an ass kicking. Sorry, but parent or not, any man who threatens to "beat your face" to a women needs to be smacked around a good bit.

 

beating dad's ass is a stupid idea. it would be the first clear cut crime committed.

the girl either needs to stand up for herself, or get the fuck out. she is doing absolutely nothing to antagonize the dad? nothing?

every argument has two sides. every one.

didnt a bunch of people suggest the OP not buy a newer truck? life sucks without a backup plan, and money saved. lesson learned right?

 

Oh, a credible threat of violence is often an offense. However, heated words during an argument, obviously not followed through with action, would rarely cross that threshold. If that were not the case, with all the boisterous rhetoric during arguments, there'd be a heck of a lot more people in jail.

-

 

hope all works out, but in meantime

 

Tell her to get a job as a stripper or an escort, you guys will be able to buy a house in no time!!!!

 

My girlfriends ex stepdad used to beat the crap out of her when her mom wasnt around. He was a druggie and she was scared of him beyond belief. He finally hit her mom and she called the cops. My girlfriend didnt tell her mom until after the divorce. I didn't find out until then either. Yet I still saw the bruises.

I know how you feel.