Officially Drunk!

According to my wife I am "Officially Drunk" and sleeping on the sofa! I LOVE THE SOFA!! That is all...

 

You aren't drunk enough if you have no misspellings and proper grammar.

 

LOL, I know! I had to use Microsoft word to spell "Officially" right but I am a Marine so that is normal.

 

So if your wife said you're "officially drunk" you must have had oh 5 beers and 2 shots. To anyone but wives that would qualify as a pretty average night.

 

Well again I am a Marine so that is 9 beers and half a bottle of Jameson, now by the time I am through this bottle and open another. Then I will be drunk!

 

yeah im getting there... no wife, but drunk non-the-less... trying to kill this everclear bottle...

i think im gonna sleep in the truck tonight... just for the drunken thrill of it...
one time i woke up on the washer machine... now that was freaking... the next day had to re-trace my steps, making sure i didnt lose shit/money along the blackout/sleep walking...

 

That's what I like to hear!

 

Sober

 

On the washing machine? That's a new one on me.

 

Last time I got drunk I sent the following text message to my best friend at roughly 4am... "I need a canoe cause I'm too drunk to drive."

 

Well Done!

Man I have woken up in the middle of a Jack in the Box drive through, Had a guy take my phone when I passed out on the sidewalk in Hi. and called my wife in NV. Got my ass kicked in Australia and went back to ship with my eyes swollen shut. Woke up in Thailand with 6 stitches on a cot with 100 bug bites and had pissed myself. The list goes on and on! Pissed on the wife one night after an eight hour beer pong tournament (we won). Maybe that's why I am on the sofa! Hmmmm

 

i had to turn my heasd sideway to see the screen righ im a wee bits fubared

 

Fucking hell yeah! When I got back from Iraq I had a buddy that was giving us some tattoo's. I got drunk and went in there at 1AM asking to get dots all over my body. I am glad he did not do that one!

 

Your thread is way to clear.
Check out Derek's thread from the other night, now he was plowed.

 

I agree, I have been doing this for quite a long time. Thats why it says "according to my wife". I am fine just have a nice buzz.

 

I think he was Drrrrrrrrruuuujnnnnkkkkkzkkkkkk or something along those lines.

 

LOL, yeah man, Derek is a good dude. I am sure it did him some good. I remember that thread. Sorry this has no chance of competing!

 

Yea, unfortunately you just hold your alcohol better.

 

hell no... the kid had like 4 zima's in him...