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GF issues, suggestions?

Discussion in 'Off-Topic Discussion' started by RoyB, Oct 4, 2009.

Page 3 of 6
  1. Oct 5, 2009 at 11:02 AM
    #41
    JDMcQ

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    JDMcQ Well-Known Member

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    So does the time that I spend on TW while she is in the room count as "Quality Time"?
     
    JDMcQ, Oct 5, 2009
    #41
  2. Oct 5, 2009 at 11:04 AM
    #42
    mjp2

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    mjp2 Living vicariously through myself Moderator

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    If she wants to spend time with people other than you, she's entitled to it. Not only that, but you cannot stop her.

    Nobody can force anyone to do anything, and it sounds like that's what you're trying to do. Stop.

    Accept the situation. If she wanted to spend the time with you, she would. Don't put weight on things she says during your talks; watch her actions.

    There's nothing else to it.
     
    mjp2, Oct 5, 2009
    #42
  3. Oct 5, 2009 at 11:08 AM
    #43
    paintdiddy

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    paintdiddy Machine gun shits

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    well put, case closed. dump the bitch.lol
     
    paintdiddy, Oct 5, 2009
    #43
  4. Oct 5, 2009 at 11:32 AM
    #44
    chris4x4

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    chris4x4 With sufficient thrust, pigs fly just fine. Moderator

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    You clearly dont know my Wife. :anonymous:
     
    chris4x4, Oct 5, 2009
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  5. Oct 5, 2009 at 2:02 PM
    #45
    RoyB

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    RoyB [OP] Well-Known Member

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    Ive tried that as well.... the older ones are "set in their ways" and have all kinds of drama- more ex bfs, ex husbands, kids, etc etc. i find they like to be wine and dined more, perhaps just looking for a free meal here and there. most of them have been in bad relationships (think about it, 30 years old and still not married) so they judge every guy they date....

    you must have missed the part where I Said she is always invited on mondays and weds....but she isnt home...so, she ISNT free like you imply. I work 6 days a week, maybe you don't. my free time is on the weekends, not during the week.


    but i DONT have kids. this is the point in a relationship where you are supposed to spend the most amount of time together to see where it leads. to get to know each other.....etc etc.

    I have no problem with family being before me...as long as i dont get shafted all the time. you are right, special/quality time.... i dont get that during the week because we are both tired from work. i save that time for my friends and family since i dont have to be 100% there.


    wow, totally missed my points. I never once said she cant see whoever or do whatever with whomever. I simply asked if she could "rearrange" the time she spends with me and other people. i am not trying to control or force her to do anything. i am looking for solutions to a situation that I have. i didnt come here asking how can i get my gf to never leave the house :rolleyes: i am looking for ways for her to spend more time with me when i am not unconcious from work.
     
    RoyB, Oct 5, 2009
    #45
  6. Oct 5, 2009 at 2:11 PM
    #46
    KenpachiZaraki

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    KenpachiZaraki Its Wicked Flow BITCHES!!

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    KenpachiZaraki, Oct 5, 2009
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  7. Oct 5, 2009 at 2:13 PM
    #47
    mjp2

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    YOU missed the point. I know she can come and go as she pleases. That's exactly what she's doing -- she prefers to spend your "together" time without you.

    You can't get her to change her schedule if she chooses not to. She chooses not to.
     
    mjp2, Oct 5, 2009
    #47
  8. Oct 5, 2009 at 2:23 PM
    #48
    RoyB

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    RoyB [OP] Well-Known Member

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    i find that some people need a second opinion or a suggestion on another way of doing things to be more effective. she (as most people i know) tend to get overwhelmed when they have to manage a lot of things that are going on at the same time. what i wanted most out of this post was whether or not i am asking for more than the norm in spending time together. you never answered that. you only said that she is doing what she wants to.

    she can change her schedule if it makes everyone happy, she tried it out with me (coming home on sundays). it just isnt working out like planned.
     
    RoyB, Oct 5, 2009
    #48
  9. Oct 5, 2009 at 2:27 PM
    #49
    chris4x4

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    chris4x4 With sufficient thrust, pigs fly just fine. Moderator

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    :popcorn:
     
    chris4x4, Oct 5, 2009
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  10. Oct 5, 2009 at 2:29 PM
    #50
    abailey

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    abailey Member

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    Dude I hate to say it but it is over.... I dated a guy a year ago for 4 years and there was a seven year difference between us and the same exact thing happended! When you are young and 22, you want to go and hang out with your friends and party or whatever she does. I know when I stayed home to spend the weekends with him, I felt like I was missing out on everything else that my friends were doing and I almost held a grudge towards him because I felt like I had to either hang out with him and not get to see my friends or he would accuse me of not spending enough time with him. Obviously you are a little more older and are ready to settle down a bit and shes not. She till has a lot of hanging out and partying to do before she is ready to just give that up.

    This problem is only going to get worse, I can promise you that. If you complain enough to her about it, you are just going to drive her away even further. Take my advice man, I was the young girl who always wanted to go and hang out with all of my friends and all my bf did was complain and we arent together anymore. Sorry
     
    abailey, Oct 5, 2009
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  11. Oct 5, 2009 at 2:31 PM
    #51
    fghtngsquirrel

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    fghtngsquirrel Ka-freakin'-BOOM!

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    Well no one knows the situation better than you and her, so you both need to discuss it collectively. Communication is key in any relationship.

    Someone mentioned earlier that neither of y'all have time to share. My girlfriend lives 40 miles away, works 3 days a week, and goes to school the remaining 4. I go to school 5 days a week, work 5 days a week, and have 2 days off. My point is that time does not necessarily matter... it depends on the importance of the relationship.

    It's obvious that you two are not on the same level in this relationship, so either balance it out or end it.
     
    fghtngsquirrel, Oct 5, 2009
    #51
  12. Oct 5, 2009 at 2:32 PM
    #52
    chris4x4

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    chris4x4 With sufficient thrust, pigs fly just fine. Moderator

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    Maybe she should post up and give her side?
     
    chris4x4, Oct 5, 2009
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  13. Oct 5, 2009 at 2:33 PM
    #53
    fghtngsquirrel

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    fghtngsquirrel Ka-freakin'-BOOM!

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    x2
     
    fghtngsquirrel, Oct 5, 2009
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  14. Oct 5, 2009 at 2:34 PM
    #54
    mjp2

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    mjp2 Living vicariously through myself Moderator

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    To directly answer your question, yes, you are asking too much.

    You have a self-centered view of the situation, as is normal. She does too, which is also normal. This statement is the most telling so far: "she can change her schedule if it makes everyone happy". What about if it doesn't make HER happy?

    Her happiness is not about you. It's about her. You do not factor into the equation even if you're in a relationship. If she's not happy, she will make changes until she is. If changing her schedule makes her unhappy, she'll find/make excuses why she can't. Things will come up. Visits will run over. She'll get a flat tire. Whatever.

    If she wanted to be there, she would be. That you even have to request/schedule time is evidence enough. Yes, you are asking too much.
     
    mjp2, Oct 5, 2009
    #54
  15. Oct 5, 2009 at 2:35 PM
    #55
    chris4x4

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    chris4x4 With sufficient thrust, pigs fly just fine. Moderator

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    And thank you for calling TW Love line.....


    Next caller!


    Mike, We have a guy from Phoenix Arizona, who claims his Wife beats him..........
     
    chris4x4, Oct 5, 2009
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  16. Oct 5, 2009 at 2:36 PM
    #56
    JDMcQ

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    JDMcQ Well-Known Member

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    Would it be inappropriate to quote Roy when he was denying this girls status as "girlfriend"?
     
    JDMcQ, Oct 5, 2009
    #56
  17. Oct 5, 2009 at 2:36 PM
    #57
    JDMcQ

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    JDMcQ Well-Known Member

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    My girl beats me too. :(
     
    JDMcQ, Oct 5, 2009
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  18. Oct 5, 2009 at 2:36 PM
    #58
    mjp2

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    mjp2 Living vicariously through myself Moderator

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    Then he'd better make that sammich she asked for. Next caller. :D
     
    mjp2, Oct 5, 2009
    #58
  19. Oct 5, 2009 at 2:38 PM
    #59
    chris4x4

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    chris4x4 With sufficient thrust, pigs fly just fine. Moderator

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    Thank you Mike....We now have a.....Monkey.....on the phone :confused: From Pennsylvania...Says he gets beat also.......
     
    chris4x4, Oct 5, 2009
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  20. Oct 5, 2009 at 2:39 PM
    #60
    JDMcQ

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    JDMcQ Well-Known Member

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    Hi...Umm...My girlfriend hits me. She popped me in the ribs Saturday while I was driving. She says it is for my own good.
     
    JDMcQ, Oct 5, 2009
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