Work Restroom Etiquette

At least you can get your kid to flush. I get so pissed when i lift a seat to get an eye full of logs. He doesn't even use toilet paper! So its always a full shot.

11 years old and he still cant wipe his own ass. Drives me fucking nuts! His underwear looks like a murder scene where the weapon was a turd.

Told his mom that she can no longer buy white underwear. Darks only and i wear gloves when i run his laundry.

 

he occasionally leaves me a bowl of turd soup overnight, hes 13. I snap a pic and send it to him and mom so thats the first thing they see when they get up

 

No kids, still live at home with dad. Definitely crapped in the middle of the night before and forgot to flush, woke up the next morning smelling shit everywhere like who the hell left this???! Oh..wait...

 

Im up to full shaming of him on the daily. Last night i said dude you're the trifecta of stank.

Wont shower, wont wear deodorant, brush his teeth or wipe his ass. I say good luck getting girls to come near you dude.

 

He will grow out of it.

 

Best.thread.ever.

 

Til you're the one sitting there and the auto lights go out mid-dump. Start throwing wads of TP over the stall to activate the motion sensor to no avail, and fuq...run out of TP. Now your stuck in the dark with a dirty ass and the paper is scattered all over the dark bathroom floor. What the hell! Open the stall door with pants around your ankles and as soon as you go out to recover some paper bombs to wipe your ass, the lights come on, the door opens and your supervisor walks in. Perfect

 

Man I hope so. I discussed making a photo album of his greatest underwear deep stage burnouts and keeping it until he brings his 1st girlfriend or wife to be home.
I figure ive had to deal with his shit for this long I will have my payback.

 

I do a great deal of TW on the shitter at work and all phones work as a flashlight.

 

Some guy left a log sitting in the toilet at work one time. I swear to God itwas the size of my forearm. HTF does one's asshole pass something that large? (Rhetorical ?, don't answer)

 

Lol

Sorry but I giggled over that one.

 

At my work we have to change out of our work clothes and i swear to god everyday i dont know who but they take a big dump right before we go in the locker room to change at it reeks of shit... whoever you are i will find you

 

The things you see in the guys bathrooms... ugh. My fav is the gallon of piss on the floor in front of each urinal, piss/shit on the shitter's seat, and the people who dont wash up after taking a shit. And I swear the fucking stalls are ALWAYS occupied. Guys love bringing their office dishware in with them as well as not washing hands after taking a shit. Lovely

Then the guys who change their cloths putting everything including their phone on the floor.

 

Few weeks back I heard snoring coming from the stall next to me at work

 

I was having a bad night at work awhile back and it was toopped off by the one bathroom that was in service has blood on the seat...mens bathroom mind you...so I called for the plant supervisor and his leads to come mark it hazmat and went into detail on the radio...hope the bleeding ass heard me

 

I used to work with an engineer and that motherfucker pissed on the seat every single time. Fucking supposed to be the pinnacle of intelligence and efficiency but can't get his piss into a bowl? C'mon man. Really takes the jam out of your donut when you need to drop a spike.

 

Being in construction I am relegated to using porta-pots 95% of the time, that said, a few of my 'issues' are:

1) I will not dump in the johns which have no lid, they stand 5' tall and have a piss trough on the back side so if you're inclined to poop a co-worker can piss to your back side and look down on you doing business... NO THANKS !!

2) Why do guys throw paper and trash in urinal to clog it?? Its always enjoyable to go in and see a gallon of piss fermenting there.

3) Writing and graffiti on the walls.... You enjoy spending enough time in there to write a book ?!?

 

TRUTH!!!is it that hard to hit the bowl?does there wife or mommy clean up such things at home?i know where I work a lot of the plant people wear rubber boots so I doubt they care,you go in to drop the hammer and you don't even want to drop your pants cause you are on tiles that have piss as grout

 

apparently you never been in Iraq where the TCN squat shitting in the port a jon and shit all over the place in 120+ heat yeah next shitter that's clean. also here back in the states there are some dickholes who shit and still leave shit on the rim of the toilet im like how the fuck do you do that. I guess that's what they do at home. im Asian and I have straight clean freak OCD. in Iraq I carried Lysol wherever I go to to drop one use half a bottle spraying and spray more and more lol.