PennSilverTaco's "Perfect 5-Lug Regular Cab" Build, Aspergers, and General BS MegaThread!

Luckily it's still under warranty, and I'm bringing my truck to the dealer instead of my longtime independent mechanic tomorrow for an oil change specifically so I can get the horn replaced...

If the THIRD replacement horn since September 2015 has this problem, I want a different one...

I am NOT looking for a Nathan AirChime K5 here, just a high-quality drop-in replacement for the factory horn in a 2010 Tacoma, something that will serve the purpose of letting people know I'm there so they don't merge into me...

Another problem I often encounter in Doylestown is drunk people who are walking right down the middle of the road oblivious to the fact that there is a vehicle behind them, or will be standing still, facing my truck, and looking me straight in the eye, but are disturbingly unaware of the fact that there's over 2 tons of pickup truck idling with the high-beams on...

 

Like Michael Jackson in the soda commercial gone wrong?

 

Pretty much exactly.

 

I would like to first point out that this is a RESPONSIBLE drinking story but still a drinking story nonetheless. It was December 2015, weekend before Christmas, and I was having a good time with my friends/coworkers at Puck. Again, an important part is that I DID NOT DRIVE. I planned on going slightly above .08 at a mininum, and took an Uber home at like 1am. Nothing bad happened except for the first and only hangover I ever had that lasted an entire day.

I only do this on very special occasions, but if I only drink beers (and maybe 1 or 2 shots), I have an ability to lose track of of how many beers I had and wake up the next morning like nothing happened. On this Saturday night, I actually did not have that many beers... Maybe six or seven between 8-9pm and 2am? The problem was that I also did at least 5 "Puck Bombs." Pretty much This+This+This=Puck Bomb (or Super Bowl Bomb if it's the end of football season).

The sugar from the goddamn Monsters is what gave me the hangover. Not even a year later (September 2016) I did a tequila flight (equal to about 5 or 6 shots) in ten minutes, and then had 5 or 6 six beers and a car bomb, and I did not get a hangover.

That Saturday before Christmas 2015 did not end with the Puck bombs or the three to four beers I had at my place of employment. A bunch of us went over to another bar (The Other Side), where I probably had two more beers, then a cute 23-year old blonde bartender from the bar where I work said she was buying the group, including me, a round of Patrón. I may have also done another shot at Other Side, and then right around last call we found our way back to Puck, and the bartender working the patio there let me buy a bottle of beer in cash even though he'd already made last call. Then, I called an Uber, went home, and fell asleep. At about 4am or maybe 5am, I woke up with the beginning of the hangover, couldn't get back to sleep, and played Saints Row the Third for about an hour. I then went back to sleep and woke up at around noon feeling fully rested but with my first (and so far last) full blown hangover.

The funniest part of the whole thing is that though even to this day I still remember everything about that night except what my Uber driver looked like or the vehicle they were driving, I somehow forgot my parents had drove to town for their own separate dinner date the previous evening, and then brought the Tacoma home with them at around 8:45pm. I woke up thinking that the Tacoma was still sitting in the manager's spot back at Puck, but then walked to my bedroom window, which overlooked the driveway, and breathed a huge sigh of relief when I saw my truck sitting in the driveway. I knew I had NOT driven home drunk, but I still couldn't comprehend how the hell my Tacoma, like magic, had seemingly become it's own designated driver and driven ITSELF home.

The problem was solved when I went downstairs and asked my parents how the truck made it home without me, and they told me they'd driven it home.

Also, that Sunday evening, still hung over, I drove about an hour out to Bethlehem to meet my cousin for a trivia night. I had a pint of Guinness, which I think actually helped my hangover. I woke up on Monday morning feeling just fine...

 

Hella horns are popular in the Subaru world. They make oem style horns as well as aftermarket horns.

 

Thanks! And they don't have a wimpy sound to them?

 

Dare I ask what that is..

 

A friend of mine backed at a club and it was a mixed bag. They were strict about fraternization of any kind..

 

Photographer and webmaster for InTheCrack.Com (NSFW)
This was a few years ago when the UG was active. Not sure if he's still working there.

 

Do you mean Bare-Back OP?

 

That seems like a good job for guys who can't get it up without the little blue pill...

 

LOL, no... Barback... A bartender's assistant...

Barbacks do pretty much everything, and when they own a pickup truck like I do, they do even more... I rarely actually "barback," but I have seriously done everything at Puck (including barbacking) except bartending and bouncing...

Duties of the typical barback include:
Changing kegs
Stocking beer
Cutting fruit
Juicing fruit
Refilling the ice behind the bar
Busing tables
Running food
Unclogging toilets
Acting as a bouncer when the actual bouncers are busy

 

O my bad.

 

I haven't heard them in person, but they're popular because the subie horns are super wimpy.

 

Things I've done during business hours to seriously help out when Puck had a decent crowd at a bare minimum or was completely slammed:

One time in 2015, a pretty good band from Vermont was performing at Puck. I think the band is called Waylon Speed? One of the guitar players (also a 2nd gen Tacoma owner), managed to snap 2 strings right before the show. The band's only vehicle was an old Ford Club Wagon with a huge trailer hitched up to it, and it would have been a pain in the ass to drive that. My boss told the guitarist to "Find Charlie," and that's what he did. I drove him to the local music store to get some replacement strings, pretty much saved the show (the whole band's words, not mine), and the band was so grateful that I got a copy of their latest CD and probably $20 or $30 of additional free merch. Situations like this are the reason that I spent an extra $30 for a head unit with a CD player when I got my new stereo; I love listening to the free CDs I get at Puck in my truck on the way home from work.

In November 2015, when my truck was still f***ed up from the drunk driving incident: Brought a 15-year old Nissan Maxima with almost 200K miles and a bad alternator, which belonged to the frontman of a very popular local band performing at Puck that night, back from the dead; I used only my Tacoma with an Interstate Mega-Tron battery and a pair of jumper cables I got on sale at Bon-Ton, and I pretty much saved the show AGAIN (more details if you're interested).

GM's boyfriend works for an energy drink company, and sometime last summer (2016), he stopped by in his company van to drop something off. The company van is a 2014 Chevy Express 2500 with the 4.8L V8, a 3.42 open rear (I'm a Chevy nerd and I read the little code sticker in the glove box), and maybe 75K miles on it at the time. The BF left his van parked in the alley outside the venue with the hazards on, and the van was totally dead when he went to leave like 20 minutes later. I drove my Tacoma the wrong way up a 1-way narrow alley, parked facing the van, and a guy from the band playing at Puck that night hooked up the jumper cables for us. I did not even have to goose the accelerator and give the van juice. Boss's BF turned the key and it just fired right up within seconds. Hasn't happened since and nobody knows how or why this happened.

Another time back in the summer of 2015, it was a particularly busy Friday or Saturday, but things were going fine and my boss told me to go home and relax. I was walking out to my Tacoma when my boss came running out and said she needed me to run an errand, and she'd pay me extra in cash. This was the one and only time I'm aware of that the system responsible for delivering the non-alcoholic drinks to the soda guns behind the bars completely failed. Anyone in the service industry knows that a situation like this can and will turn into a full scale riot.

Long story short, my boss gave me a list of sodas and a large amount of cash, then told me to drive to the local Acme and buy as much as I could. I came back with like a dozen 12-packs of various canned soda in the back of the Tacoma, and was paid $60 in cash for barely thirty minutes of work.

 

This one is REALLY long so I just put it in a separate post.

One Friday or Saturday when I was there as a customer and not working, a trio of drunk people who'd been there earlier when I was working came back because the drunkest of the three had lost his credit card (My boss was hostessing that night and we'd just gotten an iPad card reader thing; This same guy was so hammered when he showed up the first time that he handed my boss his driver's license instead of the credit card that he ended up losing). Anyway, the drunk guy who lost his credit but still had a valid Pennsylvania driver's license in his possession just would not leave, even though it was pretty damn obvious his card was not at my bar. His friends were drunk, but nowhere near as drunk as he was, and they were telling him to just forget about it. I've personally never misplaced a driver's license in the 6 years since I first got one, but I have lost credit cards and debit/ATM cards, and in my opinion those are easier to deal with than a missing license.

This bartender, a friend of mine, was working that night and starting to get pissed that these idiots wouldn't leave. These three guys were not causing a problem, but they were hammered and just would not leave. The bouncers were upstairs on the patio and had better things to do. The GM's office is right there next to the lobby, and the bartender told me to just stand in front of entrance to the boss's office. I literally took up the whole doorway, these three guys were all half my size, and the bartender knew they'd be afraid of me. Keep in mind I'd been off the clock for hours and had a few beers in me at that point. I just talked with these three drunks for a few minutes, and they finally just left...

Also, it is obnoxious how many people give the bartender their driver's license when it comes time to pay their tab. If I can tell the difference between my license and my Visa card when I'm buying two car bombs for me and my friend, after a flight of tequila and about a half dozen beers (true story) before the car bombs, most drunk people should be capable of not confusing their license with their credit card.

 

OK.

 

Where's the other threads, this is funny

 

It's coming