New England B.S. Thread

I saw this yesterday...Looks like an oldschool playboy comic..

 

What's the differed between jelly and jam?

I can't jelly my dick down your throat

 

This raises some interesting questions about you, actually...

 

What's the difference between 'ooh' and 'aah'?


About 3 inches

 

Just leave it alone... moving along now

 

Oh I have more. But the request was for one joke

 

What's the difference between a garbanzo bean and a chickpea?

 

I request more jokes from you

 

You can't have a garbanzo bean on your face.

 

what do a pizza delivery man and a gynocologist have in common?

they both get close enough to smell the goods, but if they eat they'll lose their job

 

Oh you know. Just a quick trip up to Vermont to do some trail riding in a cave on top of a mountain...

 

A penguin is was getting his car fixed at a shop on a hot day. The mechanic told him there’s an ice cream shop next door, and to go get some to cool off.

Penguin got ice cream all over him because he couldn’t hold the cone with his flippers. He goes back to the shop and the mechanic says “it looks like you blew a seal” and the penguin goes “no it’s just ice cream!”

 

what did one lesbian vampire say to the other?


"same time next month?"

 

Why wasn't Jesus born in Ireland?

No where to find 3 wise men or a virgin.

 

You hear the one about Pierre the great French fighter pilot?

 

My best jokes are ones that require a visual from me but let's see if this translates:

Bubba and Cleatus were floating down the river on their raft trying to hook some catfish when they pass a beautiful blonde on shore who for no reason at all pulls up her blouse and shows them her fantastic breasts.

Bubba says to Cleatus, "Quick, show her your nuts!"

So Cleatus goes:

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Cant think of any right now lol. Training another new guy at work. Week number 4 of training new people

 

What's 6 inches long, has 2 nuts, and women love?

Almond Joy.

 

It's true