sweet CL find hahah

To the Scumsucking Bike Thief who stole my baby blue Raleigh mountain bike with 19' frame:

Ha, the joke is on you sucker. That bike is jacked. And only someone like me could love it for what it was what with its seat nearly touching the back tire (cheers to you kids who stole the seat ratchet. Very clever). The wheels wobble but they don't fall down and the brakes work when they aren't frozen up thanks to ocean front living. The chain slips constantly and it hasn't been maintained once in the four years I've abused it. The rear tube was patched two months ago - my most feverent hope is that it gives out while you are in a remote location late at night with few to no public transportation options. Suck on that fartface.

If you see such a ridiculous looking bike with a GetEQUAL, Sticky Rice, or Maui Surf Shop sticker, please thump the soulless jackel riding it (or the hapless chump that actually paid money for such a debacle on wheels). I've got a lust for bad decisions and tequila and I would love to encounter the donkey who thought stealing my POS bike was a good investment of their time.

I miss my bike, assmonkey. I hope you get doored - preferably while cruising down 13th street - you know, that really steep hill? Right there jerk pants. Right there.


http://washingtondc.craigslist.org/doc/bik/1980344007.html

 

haha I am stationed in DC also and I really hope they get whats coming to them

 

That was a good laugh for the evening