Left handed screwdrivers

I was handed a box of spark plugs and a plug wrench and sent out to change the plugs on the crane motor. It was a very old diesel engine with no plugs, of course... They all laughed and laughed.

 

A day or two before we’d take our students to the annual community job fair, us veteran teachers would convince the new teachers that they were responsible for giving a presentation and running the teacher booth once we arrived at the fair.

We informed them that principals from the various schools and the district superintendent would be there to observe. They’d often come in on the day of the trip with their presentations and speeches prepared!

 

In my younger days I used to run a pizza place (chain store).... we had delivery. I would pick up one of the 6 phone lines in the office and call the counter and put in a order for a pizza to be delivered to the store. 9 times out of 10 they would dutifully take write up the order and put the ticket on the rack for the order to be made. Sometimes we would let it go through and give it to one of the new drivers and see how long it took them to figure it out.

 

We usually tell the new employees to clean the windows on the bosses truck. Its a joke we've been playing on the new employees for the past few years and we think its hilarious. I almost fell for it when I started working there and so far I'm probably the only one who hasn't fallen for it.

 

Anyone stand Mail Buoy Watch?

 

Being in printing, the new guy was sent for a paper stretcher ( we had a wooden box marked "Acme Paper Stretcher") or a can of half tone dots.

 

How about some blinker fluid?, synthetic blend too

 

Working in restaurants the amount of times you get a newbie draining the hot water out of a coffee maker is unreal. Makes for great fun when they go for 5+ trips with a 2 gallon bucket.

 

I work in restaurants in a ski village we’d always tell the new guys. “Hey we loaned our bacon stretcher to so and so restaurant a few doors down, can you go get it back for us?” Then they’d go over there and whoever was working would know the joke and say something like “oh no sorry man, we gave it to so and so restaurant around the corner.” And so it would continue until the guy came back 30 minutes later defeated after walking in circles to 5 or so different places. Also we’d ask them to “empty the hot water out of the coffee machine” at the end of the night. Nothing like watching a poor SOB empty pitcher after pitcher of hot water for ten min only to realize it’s never gonna end. There’s others but can’t think of them at the moment.

 

Ah ya beat me to it!

 

Back when I was training a new to the company pilot on the King Air, he reached down under the captains seat, pulled up the relief tube, and ask me what it was for. Told him it was the speaking tube to communicate with the medic in the cabin of the aircraft.

 

I sent a Private to our headquarters supply in a Deuce and half for (3) spools of flight line , (4) boxes of tail hooks , 5 gal container of prop wash and a bottle of K9P

 

Check the air in the forklift tires.
Remember, the valve stems are on the inside to protect from damage.

 

I ran a tool room for a fab shop for about 2 years and pretty much heard it all in the first month when I was still green to the fab yard life. Level bubble, pipe stretcher, sky hook, dragonfly spray, even the left hand screw driver, can of striped paint, metal glue, you name it I’ve probably heard it

 

Service days in the dental field. We’d send the new guys asking for the amalgam shade guide. Everybody knew the joke and the first person would send him across the clinic because “I think Dr. Marks has it”. Dr Marks would send them bouncing over to another suite. And so on. We had about 20 docs, so this could go on for a while. Usually some doc or staffer took pity on them after 10 or so bounces.

 

Currently building a new Substation. Last week I overheard one of the lead electricians sending and apprentice for a bucket of Ohm's... he gave very clear instructions about where to find it in the tool trailer.
In a previous life I was a chef. We would send the kids to borrow a "bacon stretcher" from another restaurant. If you did it right they would get sent to a few different places before they figured it out.

 

Kind of the opposite thing here but years back when DEF was a new thing I sent one of our new parts drivers to go pick up more.

Well this new driver was an older guy and he was absolutely not going to fall for this younger guy's tricks. He knew for a fact that diesel exhaust fluid wasn't a real thing and that I was disrespecting him by thinking I could trick him into going to buy some. Dude quit on the spot over it.

 

When I was in boy scouts, the troop leader sent me to a few camp sites looking for post holes. Took about 3 campsites of people laughing their asses off at me before I figured it out