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Dad jokes

Discussion in 'Off-Topic Discussion' started by pinktaco808, Jun 30, 2020.

Page 31 of 73
  1. May 18, 2022 at 8:41 AM
    #601
    StAndrew

    #601
    StAndrew Wait for it...

    Joined:
    Feb 8, 2010
    Member:
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    Messages:
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    Gender:
    Male
    First Name:
    Chris
    Hampton Roads, Va
    Vehicle:
    SR5 4x4TRD
    Intake, exhaust, lift. Typical stuff.
    What's the worst part about Friday?



    Realizing its still Wednesday.
     
    StAndrew, May 18, 2022
    #601
    grdgz97, Whitebutler, Pablo8 and 1 other person like this.
  2. May 19, 2022 at 6:13 AM
    #602
    imjustabill1970

    #602
    imjustabill1970 Twitter: imjustabill1970

    Joined:
    Feb 5, 2014
    Member:
    #122336
    Messages:
    1,545
    Gender:
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    First Name:
    bill
    clarksville, tn
    Vehicle:
    2017 TRD Off Road DCSB
    SUSPENSION: Icon Stage 4 with tubular UCAs WHEELS: Black ProComp 69 TIRES: BFG KO2s at 265/75/16 Partially debadged Diaz Fabrication Model T up front
    What's the toughest part about being a Vegan?

    Keeping it to yourself.
     
    imjustabill1970, May 19, 2022
    #602
    strider98, po35042, Cudgel and 8 others like this.
  3. May 19, 2022 at 6:39 AM
    #603
    TexasTacoLT

    #603
    TexasTacoLT Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Oct 1, 2013
    Member:
    #113610
    Messages:
    514
    Gender:
    Male
    First Name:
    John
    Killeen, TX
    Vehicle:
    '14 TRD Offroad
    3" Lift (ToyTech Coilovers and AAL) Bilstein 5100 Shocks Total Chaos UCAs Method Double Standard 17" BFG All-Terrain T/A KO2 (Removed) 33" BFG Mud Terrain Tires Colormatched Grill surround HomerTaco mesh grill insert Legacy "Toyota" Emblem Shrockworks plate rear bumper All-Pro plate front bumper w/ foglights All-Pro rock sliders Smoked Tail-lights DIY Steel Tailgate reinforcement Locking Tailgate handle Tint (15%) w/ sunstrip Tyger Tonneau cover (Removed) Bestop Soft Topper Bushwhacker colormatched fender flares DIY 8-ball shift knob DIY Amber LED grill lights DIY Debadged WeatherTech floormats Sudued US Flag door decals T-100 style tailgate decal Two way radio w/ 3' whip antenna Warn 8000lb winch CalTrend Neoprene seat covers DIY Bed tie-down anchors
    Why did the scarecrow win an award?

    Because he was outstanding in his field!
     
    TexasTacoLT, May 19, 2022
    #603
    DPTacomaGuy, Honda2Toyota, grdgz97 and 1 other person like this.
  4. May 19, 2022 at 9:07 AM
    #604
    Spare Parts

    #604
    Spare Parts Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Sep 9, 2016
    Member:
    #196811
    Messages:
    13,810
    Southern Maine
    Vehicle:
    2022 Off Road Premium 4Runner Lunar Rock
    [​IMG]
     
    Spare Parts, May 19, 2022
    #604
    davidstacoma, StAndrew[QUOTED], Hardscrabble and 3 others like this.
  5. May 20, 2022 at 7:28 PM
    #605
    SRH

    #605
    SRH My horns hold up my halo

    Joined:
    Jan 12, 2019
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    Shauna
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    D7C60C4D-0BA7-43A3-B495-6C52F255A19F.jpg
     
    SRH, May 20, 2022
    #605
    Canadian Joe, strider98, Hardscrabble and 10 others like this.
  6. May 21, 2022 at 8:30 PM
    #606
    TexasTacoLT

    #606
    TexasTacoLT Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Oct 1, 2013
    Member:
    #113610
    Messages:
    514
    Gender:
    Male
    First Name:
    John
    Killeen, TX
    Vehicle:
    '14 TRD Offroad
    3" Lift (ToyTech Coilovers and AAL) Bilstein 5100 Shocks Total Chaos UCAs Method Double Standard 17" BFG All-Terrain T/A KO2 (Removed) 33" BFG Mud Terrain Tires Colormatched Grill surround HomerTaco mesh grill insert Legacy "Toyota" Emblem Shrockworks plate rear bumper All-Pro plate front bumper w/ foglights All-Pro rock sliders Smoked Tail-lights DIY Steel Tailgate reinforcement Locking Tailgate handle Tint (15%) w/ sunstrip Tyger Tonneau cover (Removed) Bestop Soft Topper Bushwhacker colormatched fender flares DIY 8-ball shift knob DIY Amber LED grill lights DIY Debadged WeatherTech floormats Sudued US Flag door decals T-100 style tailgate decal Two way radio w/ 3' whip antenna Warn 8000lb winch CalTrend Neoprene seat covers DIY Bed tie-down anchors
    I tell Dad jokes, but I have no kids. I'm a Faux Pa.
     
    TexasTacoLT, May 21, 2022
    #606
    davidstacoma, po35042, grdgz97 and 13 others like this.
  7. May 23, 2022 at 7:47 AM
    #607
    wiljayhi

    #607
    wiljayhi “..ain’t nobody’s business if I do…”

    Joined:
    Oct 8, 2018
    Member:
    #268685
    Messages:
    2,635
    First Name:
    Jim
    Murky Water, MB, eh?
    Vehicle:
    3G, Tuned
    The other day I told my wife she should embrace her mistakes.

    So she hugged me.
     
    wiljayhi, May 23, 2022
    #607
    Canadian Joe, davidstacoma, wilcam47 and 11 others like this.
  8. May 23, 2022 at 7:52 AM
    #608
    Shane_O

    #608
    Shane_O Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Apr 27, 2022
    Member:
    #396010
    Messages:
    96
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    Male
    First Name:
    Shane
    San Angelo, TX
    Vehicle:
    2004 Tacoma Ext Cab 4x4
    What do you call a deer with no eyes?

    No eye deer.

    What do you call a deer with no eyes and no legs?

    Still no eye deer.
     
    Shane_O, May 23, 2022
    #608
    wilcam47, grdgz97, TexasTacoLT and 1 other person like this.
  9. May 23, 2022 at 7:53 AM
    #609
    Shane_O

    #609
    Shane_O Well-Known Member

    Joined:
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    #396010
    Messages:
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    Male
    First Name:
    Shane
    San Angelo, TX
    Vehicle:
    2004 Tacoma Ext Cab 4x4
    What do you call a dad joke when no one is around to hear it?

    Funny.
     
    Shane_O, May 23, 2022
    #609
    strider98, grdgz97, TexasTacoLT and 6 others like this.
  10. May 23, 2022 at 7:55 AM
    #610
    Shane_O

    #610
    Shane_O Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Apr 27, 2022
    Member:
    #396010
    Messages:
    96
    Gender:
    Male
    First Name:
    Shane
    San Angelo, TX
    Vehicle:
    2004 Tacoma Ext Cab 4x4
    And one more...

    If your nose runs and your feet smell, then you were built upside down.
     
    Shane_O, May 23, 2022
    #610
    oldtimertoyota, grdgz97, TexasTacoLT and 2 others like this.
  11. May 23, 2022 at 8:00 AM
    #611
    wiljayhi

    #611
    wiljayhi “..ain’t nobody’s business if I do…”

    Joined:
    Oct 8, 2018
    Member:
    #268685
    Messages:
    2,635
    First Name:
    Jim
    Murky Water, MB, eh?
    Vehicle:
    3G, Tuned
    My wife says I only have two faults:

    I don't listen and something else
     
    wiljayhi, May 23, 2022
    #611
    strider98, Hardscrabble, oldtimertoyota and 10 others like this.
  12. May 23, 2022 at 8:07 AM
    #612
    Pablo8

    #612
    Pablo8 Here!

    Joined:
    Aug 7, 2019
    Member:
    #301483
    Messages:
    9,687
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    Male
    First Name:
    Paul
    Everson WA
    Vehicle:
    2019 Cement Sport 4X4 MT AC
    OVT, 4.88, ADM, F&R ARB lock, KO2's, RWD L MOD
    Too good to be dad jokes!!!
     
    Pablo8, May 23, 2022
    #612
    TexasTacoLT and wiljayhi like this.
  13. May 23, 2022 at 2:53 PM
    #613
    TheFang

    #613
    TheFang No Big Deal

    Joined:
    Jul 15, 2014
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    #133985
    Messages:
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    Male
    SoCal
    Vehicle:
    Tacoma TRD Sport
    TRD Exhaust, URD Short Shift, TRD Supercharger, Hellwig rear sway bar, TWM shift knob, limo tint, URD Y-pipe, URD LT Headers, URD Rear O2 Sim, Custom tube front and rear bumpers, LED spot pods, K&N CAI
    Two peanuts were walking down a dark alley at night....

    One was assaulted.
     
    TheFang, May 23, 2022
    #613
    davidstacoma, grdgz97, TexasTacoLT and 2 others like this.
  14. May 24, 2022 at 10:38 AM
    #614
    Tiny's Taco

    #614
    Tiny's Taco The Wanderer

    Joined:
    Apr 6, 2019
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    #289265
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    Shenandoah Valley
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    That's a horrible idea. What time?
    upload_2022-5-24_13-38-10.jpg
     
    Tiny's Taco, May 24, 2022
    #614
    grdgz97, TexasTacoLT, RangerComa and 1 other person like this.
  15. May 24, 2022 at 2:00 PM
    #615
    Beaner Taco

    #615
    Beaner Taco Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Dec 4, 2017
    Member:
    #237637
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    Male
    WV
    Vehicle:
    '17 SR5
    Three moles were in a tunnel. The first one says I smell a cake baking. The second one says I smell fresh pineapple. The last one says that’s funny I just smell molasses.
     
    Beaner Taco, May 24, 2022
    #615
    strider98, davidstacoma, landphil and 7 others like this.
  16. May 24, 2022 at 4:13 PM
    #616
    wiljayhi

    #616
    wiljayhi “..ain’t nobody’s business if I do…”

    Joined:
    Oct 8, 2018
    Member:
    #268685
    Messages:
    2,635
    First Name:
    Jim
    Murky Water, MB, eh?
    Vehicle:
    3G, Tuned
    16393F30-08B1-46BC-8F08-515137081E2E.jpg
     
    wiljayhi, May 24, 2022
    #616
    koditten, Whitebutler, TexasTacoLT and 1 other person like this.
  17. May 24, 2022 at 4:37 PM
    #617
    Shane_O

    #617
    Shane_O Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Apr 27, 2022
    Member:
    #396010
    Messages:
    96
    Gender:
    Male
    First Name:
    Shane
    San Angelo, TX
    Vehicle:
    2004 Tacoma Ext Cab 4x4
    Kickin’ and a gougin’ in the mud and the blood and the beer.
     
    Shane_O, May 24, 2022
    #617
    strider98, MSN88longbed, koditten and 4 others like this.
  18. May 24, 2022 at 4:38 PM
    #618
    wiljayhi

    #618
    wiljayhi “..ain’t nobody’s business if I do…”

    Joined:
    Oct 8, 2018
    Member:
    #268685
    Messages:
    2,635
    First Name:
    Jim
    Murky Water, MB, eh?
    Vehicle:
    3G, Tuned
    An accountant, an engineer and a lawyer were bragging about their dogs’ abilities.

    The accountant said: “ledger”, count out sixteen cookies, and the dog did.

    The engineer said: “sliderule”, pile those cookies in four piles of four, and the dog did.

    The lawyer was out of ideas for his dog so he said: “loophole”, do what I do.
    So the dog ate all the cookies and screwed the other two dogs.
     
    wiljayhi, May 24, 2022
    #618
    strider98, Hardscrabble, davidstacoma and 6 others like this.
  19. May 25, 2022 at 6:25 PM
    #619
    Brian_d

    #619
    Brian_d Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Oct 29, 2020
    Member:
    #345243
    Messages:
    81
    Gender:
    Male
    Socal
    1653508917286.jpg
     
    Brian_d, May 25, 2022
    #619
    davidstacoma, grdgz97, TexasTacoLT and 1 other person like this.
  20. May 25, 2022 at 7:43 PM
    #620
    wiljayhi

    #620
    wiljayhi “..ain’t nobody’s business if I do…”

    Joined:
    Oct 8, 2018
    Member:
    #268685
    Messages:
    2,635
    First Name:
    Jim
    Murky Water, MB, eh?
    Vehicle:
    3G, Tuned
    2064BC50-3D45-48F7-A0D5-FEE4E80DF93E.jpg
     
    wiljayhi, May 25, 2022
    #620
    bigmw, davidstacoma, jwctaco and 4 others like this.
Page 31 of 73

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