A REAL Bumper (come at me, Bro!)

Sure.

 

Your hickory plank looks kind of cool, I like the chamfered square cutout in the middle

 

I’m not an engineer and I’m not a safety guru. The NHTSA exists for a reason. Cars are now made with crumple zones, break away/collapsible parts and engines that get torpedoed in a front end collision for a reason.

I would make a guess that none of these safety improvements were designed to save the frame. They were designed so F=MA doesn’t equate linearly into human flesh.

When your experimental springy bumper gets “spronged” from behind, have fun going into oncoming traffic. Hope you upped your umbrella policy.

 

Interesting, must’ve had a bucket of greasy balls to get rid of lol

 

@Mavigogun, how many hours went into this? The bumper I mean, not the thread.

 

OH! -this is an English as a Second Language thing, then! With English, statements of circumstance- such as "the door swings on the hinges" -are not a "claims", but observations. Likewise, subjective feelings of appreciation- "I like grapes" -are not "claims"; for feelings to be elevated to "claims", a relative valuation needs be attached, such as, "grape is the best flavor of soda, and a suitable replacement for baby formula". Uncertain estimations, such as "I think I have enough rope" is also not a "claim", as no certainty has been professed, only a feeling shared.

With this understanding of the language, let's review:

"Impacts to the hickory plank will compress the lacrosse balls, the bolts free to move within the steel bumper".

This is an observation, along the lines of "the door swings on the hinges"; to become a claim, an assertion would need to be attached, such as "the door swings on the hinges without any energy lost to friction".

"Infinitely more than most bumpers, which are designed to crumple, not 'spring' back."

Again, an observation without making a quantified or relative performance assertion. Once-upon-a-time, automobiles employed bumpers featuring leaf springs, coils, and elastomers. Somewhere along the way, that practice was largely abandoned in favor of energy absorption solutions lacking a capacity to reflexively 'reset' without meaningful depletion. None of the vehicles I've owned have featured springs as part of the bumpers- the '52 International Harvester, 80's Dodge Prospector, and the 80's Dodge Ram all featured steel bumpers, either unyielding, or without any state-return capacity; my 73' Datsun 610 Wagon and '71 Impala both featured heavy rubber bumpers facing the steel bumper, could be said to have a degree of spring-back; my 2007 Peugeot Partner Adventure included only crumpling 'bumpers', as did our 2015 Golf Sportwagon, 2017 VW Altrack, 2020 and 2023 VW Tiguan's. Walking my dog in our neighborhood this morning, all the vehicles we observed featured crumple-bumpers. Regarding my 1998 Tacoma, it originally featured a crumpling plastic front bumper and steel rear. Some contemporary vehicles (mostly large trucks) DO employ large external rubber bumpers at rear for docking, rubber "horns" at front, or even thick rubber banding or tire scrap.

So, is a feature being present or absent a "claim"? If controversial, sure. How many of your vehicles feature bumpers that employ springs? All? None? Not most? A controversial number?

"At low speed, ya, I reckon my bumper is better- and at catastrophic speed, the mass can only help".

That word "reckon", here, means "suppose"- a subjective qualifier used to flag an apprehension, not a fact. Regarding that entire exchange, we can see that use was already made explicitly clear:

Q: "So in your estimation, whatever spring is added by 10 lacross balls, a chunk of wood and a stout bumper is 'better' than what the Toyota engineers put together, by some measure, because it includes some sort of spring."

A: "Oh, no- I'm not saying that at all".

Maybe you believe backing into a dock a bit too fast and coming to a stop when your steel bumper meets wall will translate less force to your frame, but I reckon a spring interlocutor will make for a less jarring experience. In your mind, is that "controversial", sans an Excel spreadsheet detailing elastomer compression capacity? After all, what reasonable person wouldn't want hard data for such outrageous claims as 'cushions are better than no cushions'? Before answering, be sure to document your survey method and sample size of responding reasonable people, as we will want to see the data supporting any dependent... claim. Such seemingly tedious nonsense is a normal part of a good-faith exchange, and not just defensive posturing and justification for behavior, after all.

Now that we have that out of the way- what is your native language? I can recommend several excellent ESL programs, if you like.

 

Ok, how many hours in the thread?

 

I couldn't agree more, and reckon most all welded-up-steel after-market constructions- mine included -are way less safe for pedestrians (and passengers of other vehicles) than the stock bumpers- both front AND back.

An amusing bit of Hanna-Barbera physics, that! I can see Wile E. Coyote hovering beyond the cliff edge, incinerated umbrella in hand, his expression: disbelief in the fantastic power of the ACME Lacrosse Ball™.

 

They approach parity.

 

Observation: that was a bit excessive, dude.

But what do I know.

 

Subjectively, it looks terrible.

Moving past that, does the ball hitch extend much farther past the distance it would on the stock bumper? I’m no physicsologist, but I think that potential change in leverage and additional weight would factor into stress/load on the factory brackets.


Lacrosse balls are great for massaging your back against a wall or rolling the sole of your feet for fasciitis.

 

Agreed.

How and what you say reflects more about you then what or who you are commenting on. I dig the consistency in tone and general attitude across different threads. What you lack in quality you try to make up for in quantity.

Pulling the Marine card unless you are active duty is some has-been shit Devil Dog; if that profile pic is you I would suggest fewer honey buns and more lo-righty-lo. You're supposed to bleed red, white, and blue not marinara ya friggin' meatball.

 

Guessing you were a POG

Edit; must've skimmed through your post that fast cause I didn't realize you were calling me fat. Being under 180lbs is a meatball?

 

“we will want to see the data”
Nice you speak for all of us lol.

You sure type a lot.
Update: Like your bumper though, quite original.

 

T'was my tongue speaking to cheek, actually- an absurd reflection of pretense.

Thanks.

 

I cannot believe this thread is still open. Surely it won’t be long…

 

As a moderator in a different corner of the internet, I want to throw the keys at this mess.

But also

As you can see from my previous entries, I brought gasoline and marshmallows to the fire too.

 

It'll just be moved to purgatory