3.5 filter housing on 2020 3.5L

Ok so the last person to change the oil overtightened the filter housing to 18 foot pounds like it says everywhere all over the web. I got the wrench /socket thing at advance.
The two flat pieces on the housing were sheared off. I didn't realize this prior to trying. So I'm trying to take the housing off and the socket is slipping and I'm smashing knuckles hard... Breaker bar and all.it just doesn't fit tightly enough on all the little flats around the outside.
Wondering if a motivx or Toyota dealer socket is better.


and so I had to buy a new housing at dealer 90 bucks. I have no idea how to get this off. I need some tips. The master mechanics at the dealer said you ** do not** tighten it to 18 foot pounds ever. That is bad information even though it is posted everywhere as accurate. They said it's an o ring seal and all you need is snug tight.

So how do I get this filter housing off ? If I can't get it I have to take it to the dealer and pay buku money to have them do it.

Side note I found out about Baxter engineering -- they make a conversion adapter that is CNC machined from T6061 aluminum to convert to a spin on filter. So I called them and no answer. Next thing I get a call back from them and the guy was great to talk to. Very informative. He said Toyota went to the paper cartridge system to save costs but after ten years they determined there is not enough pressure to get the oil to the heads fast enough and there isn't a check valve to keep the oil system pressurized so now they're going back to spin on filters. So gen 4 is going to have spin on filters again. Here's the key part of what he said -- the wix filter WIX 51085 with the XP or wp (I forget which) at the end of the filter model number that the adapter takes-- holds 40 cubic inches of oil which is like 3/4 of a quart and it has a check valve in it. It's like 3.5 inches wide by 3.75 long and huge filter area inside. And he said it will clear the stock skid plate easily. So long story short the stock system according to this guy doesn't stay pressurized and doesn't get oil up to the heads fast enough. And the switch to the spin on system with a check valve filter is better for long term engine life.

They also make a remote filter relocation part. So you can have the filter up on top like the 4.0 L 2015 engines had.

Here is the link for a 3.5L conversion to spin on filter.

https://www.baxterperformanceusa.co...k-cartridge-to-spin-on-adapter-universal.html


Any hoot that's what he said. It seems to make sense... $259 dollars to buy the part, better filtration with larger media to catch dirt , better pressure to the heads to get oil faster because of having a check valve in the filter (if you use the particular one he said), huge time savings, and no more crap to deal with filter caps.

Sorry for the long post but if you have any ideas of how to get the housing off let me know I'm in a jam. I'm sure this has happened before and someone has to have had a way out of it.