I want stories of lunatic neighbors

I toss the branches that fall in my yard over the fence... It's bad enough the roots of those 50+year old swamp maples have taken over my yard... I do get along with my neighbor.

 

oh, i knew.......reverse psychology

 

had both kinds, very much so
and then there are the ones in Florida - that is on another level

spite

 

There was a huge beech tree right on the line of my house and my next door neighbor, which was built upon in 2005. Town hall couldn't come up with a definite answer by their records of who really owned it. I'd had a few limbs fall on my side, and his electric feed is 6 feet from the tree on his side.

So, I got estimates and approached him with my knowledge. We aren't BFFLs but get along and chat when we see one another. He said "forget surveying, let's pay half each". I told him I'd have everything dropped in my yard since he has a golf course style setup and I don't. Neighbor on the other side of me has a wood stove and was thrilled to take all the wood.

Lucky it all worked out.

 

In some cities I'd agree. But most of those are big cities filled with transplants. The natives aren't quite as restless.

 

IDK about that one
I lived down there almost 30 years ago
Only a few transplants back then, still had some batshit crazy stuff
Way crazier than any other state I lived in


And the natives are restless AF because of all the transplants these days
I have a few that moved up here because FL was getting too outta hand

 

I've had two/three. First, naked meth guy. Reportedly he would get all strung out and roam around the neighborhood naked. Sometimes wind up inside the neighbors truck passed out and naked. Neighbor was an older guy that never locked his truck, so that's on him. When I first moved into my house I had a carport I was enclosing. Didn't keep too many tools left out, but maybe a tape measure or two. Used to work 2nd shift so I got home around 11:30pm. One night I was getting ready to turn into my driveway and had to do it really quick as an oncoming car approached the hill. This naturally made the tires squall being a Tacoma. All of a sudden a skinny figure runs out of the "garage" (no door at the time, 3 month lead time). I get out of the truck, yell at the guy, and he takes off running through the field. Description was right on naked meth guy.

Fast forward to summer time. Still on second shift so be-bopping down the road through some rolling hills and had to dip my high beams due to an oncoming car. Come down from one of those hills and all of a sudden there's naked meth guy, naked, and trying to bum a ride in the middle of the road! Couple months later I see him walking along the road, clothed this time, but obviously strung out. Hadn't seen him since and a co-worker that lives in the area swears he died.

Randy (AKA Crackhead Randy) and Jeff. When I first moved in there was a trailer behind a small commercial building and these two were renting it. Cars were coming and going all the time, and the same ones daily. Hadn't really put two and two together yet. I had an old rotted out Eagle Talon that I was just done with and set it out on the yard for sale. Jeff comes by one day and wants to buy it. Sure, whatever. Guy was a painter and got injured so was on disability. However, the wad of 100's he took out of his wallet told me a different story. Yea, guy just paid me with drug money. Well shit, at least it was real money. Another thing was is he had to register the car in someone else's name as he had a DUI which required him to have an ignition interlock on any vehicle. This is super illegal and the car was pretty much strait piped with no catalytic. Not exactly a car that doesn't stick out. Whatever, I got my money and got rid of the never-ending project.

Didn't see too much of Randy, but Jeff more often then not. One day I see a lifted Silverado pull up and the guy goes inside. Meh, just another drug deal. All of a sudden this skinny woman, definitely a drug user runs infront of the house and stops at my garage. Said there was a big confrontation and she wasn't supposed to be there. Tell her she can't be here and she takes off running. Never saw her again. But, Jeff moves out real quick that night. Didn't really see him again and would occasionally hear that Talon idling in the lot where the trailer was. I assume the car now either got impounded, or blew up as it needed a quart of oil every 300 miles.

Didn't really see much out of Randy. He is an old well known thief in the area. One month it just gets weird. Neighbor behind me set out several AC units for the power company to pick up and they get paid a small sum of money. Don't think much about it, and wake up the next morning to see they're gone. Wow, power company got there early. Couple hours later I get a call from the neighbors daughter asking if I seen anything or anyone last night take those AC units. Well no? Apparently the truck the company uses broke down and it was going to be late. Well, isn't this interesting. Hopped in my truck and drove across the road and peeked under the deck of the trailer. Sure as shit there they were Called the daughter and said I think there under there. Hour later I see her van haul ass down that road and turn around. Pulls up in my driveway "That crackhead! Sure as shit there they are!"

Couple months later I'm at work and see a FB post about a bad accident down the road. Nobody killed or anything like that, but the next morning I look out the front window and there's Randy's truck all smashed up. The motor obviously locked up and they're trying to get it going. They do eventually get it running a couple weeks later, but it constantly has issues.

While later I'm out chilling and Randy is sitting in his truck rocking out, shirtless obviously. OK, well enjoy your time guy. No, guy is obviously is on some pretty good drugs! He is the rockstar!



Things get calmer after this and the probation officer occasionally visits him. That is until he is found dead.

Trailer is now gone and the neighborhood is pretty quiet.

 

The house next to me has sold twice in the last 10 years . The original guy that lived there with his family for around 20 years was on his lawnmower constantly. I’ve told the story here before . I mean every fucking day . Next people didn’t know how to use a mower and waited until the grass was about a foot high and just made a mess and never did any trimming . Place looked like shit . Those people divorced and now the new couple are from Brooklyn NY . Also no lawn mower experience . Myself and another neighbor showed him how to mow and he made a mess of the yard . Then he decided to not mow the backyard which is near 3/4 of an acre and it became a hay field Tick city
He said “ well I don’t use the back yard so why should I mow it “
I told him I saw a bear in his back yard and he is back to mowing it . With the deck as low as it will go and going like a bat out of hell . It was over waist high and he’s using his big box store Husqvarna 42” tractor. It’s now about 2” and brown with all the cuttings just laying there . Unbelievable. I even went over and changed his oil and greased the mower for him and gave him pointers on mowing but I guess he wasn’t listening
The good thing is they work from home and are gone most weekends so it’s very quiet over there

 

my father in law, acts like he is the greatest lawn mower of all time. I absolutely hate, that they moved in with the wife and I. I figured he cant possibly be that bad, No. Air pressure on the tires are all off, and he cuts in crop circle fashion, like not long clean lines just whatever comes into his head. the other day he drove the mower into my shop while I was working on my spare car. telling me he thought one of the blades was bent because he had a ton of high spots, threw a jack up under the mower blades looked good. pulled them off because they were all chipped up ( he likes to also drop the deck as low as possible and drive around on my driveway to suck up pine cones and whatever else instead of being normal and using a leaf blower) but as I was about to reinstall i noticed that the wheel on the front of the mower looked a little off, he looked me dead in the eye and said "That wheel cap popped off you think I should grease it?" i said ill take a look... nope. I sent him to a farm and feed for a brand new wheel and tire somehow he managed to drive that mower long enough to absolutely grind though a wheel bearing. and the back of the race was hanging on the spindle.

though in his defense, he is a great grandfather, and a good family man. and having my mother in law around is really nice when I need to go do things and the kids dont want to come along.