Families and the “problem child”

Kind of venting here, but trying to get a consensus here and maybe calm down.

Does every family have that “fuck up” child whether its sibling, cousin, nephew, niece, or own child?

You know, the ones that can’t stand on their own two feet, constantly make the same mistakes, and their bullshit becomes the rest of the family’s bullshit and causes stress.

 

Absolutely. You are not alone.

 

Yes

 

I see you've met my cousin. I dunno if every family does but I'd bet relative to the family baseline expectations that person exists. Just important to remember everything is relative.

 

Yep

 

Sit back, relax and watch the fireworks.

 

I often ask myself, "how do you continue to make these choices? It's like you're actively trying to put yourself in these situations". The only thing I've found that works is to try and forget that they exist.

 

Or yourself

 

I'll smash open the glass family jar here...

My aunt who is approaching 70 is still financially dependent upon her mother (my grandmother) who resides in a senior living facility. She's an addict, married to a deadbeat who beats her up all the time and she makes a habit of driving across state lines to harass family members including me. She's been fired from every job she ever had for check forgery and theft. She's also stolen quite a bit of money from family. She's waiting for her mother (my grandmother) to kick off, so she gets the inheritance and the house as it's all left to her anyway. I can't wait until she drops dead.

Then there was my mom's youngest brother who was a life long alcoholic, worked at a winery and died from cirrhosis in his late 30's. He left a small son behind who is now 18. My grandfather enabled him for years paying for all his sh*t while my mother and her other brothers worked full time jobs and raised families their own.

There's one more on the extended family tree, but I'll stop.

I used to think my family was the only one, but as you meet people in life you realize all families have their issues.

I don't have much family left and I'm perfectly okay with that. I don't talk to many of them and prefer to do my own thing.

 

I was that in my younger years, mainly alcohol related. Always went to work and such. Once I got rid of that I moved out pretty quick, got married, bought my house. Never took handouts at home but one time I've asked my folks to lend me $200 since left home and it was for one week.

My sister though, lost her house to foreclosure and it came out that she borrowed about $5000 from my parents and never paid a dime back..plus would routinely hit them up for bill money instead of curbing her shopping addiction. She also refuses to acknowledge me for the past 2-3 yrs even to coordinate things for our parents. Though she feels I'm not her brother since we were adopted kids.

 

Liked for agreement on the last couple of sentences. I do miss a lot of those passed in my family, but I have an aunt left in Canada who we have never gotten along..I don't tolerate her mouth. My parents are basically it for me..

 

damn that’s hardcore man sorry you had to live with that. My shit is nowhere near that bad. Mostly just dumb assery.

times like this I think of two things:

taking psychology classes and the whole nature vs nurture thing

and Ron White’s “you can’t fix stupid.”

 

Yeah, I've got a couple of family members like that. Some too close for comfort...

 

Sometimes it's nature/nurture. Sometimes not. Sometimes (back in the day) kids would ingest lead paint.

 

You've polled the right site; there are countless of those running rampant around here.

 

lol

 

I believe more have one than dont

 

My brother was adopted crack baby, so that probably didn’t help.

 

Yep, step-dad was one of them.