Whatever

We used to build defensive walls and freeze snowballs for wars at the bus stop

We also would assault one another to get the leeward side of the big tree

 

At the ski resort I worked that. They banned employees from throwing snow balls. They don’t really enforce it though

 

51 at dawn this morning, I might need to start wearing a parka.

WINTER IS COMING!!!!!

 

About the "DUI Catch and Release" option suggested by @amyracecar
Ah, the good old days [sigh]


which reminds me...


Story Time with Gritto... Greatest Hits

Yeah, told this one before, but you're still reading, aren't you?

I was at a bachelor party once and we decided to go crash the bachelorette party.
Bad idea.
We piled into an old station wagon, got lost, busted up a phone booth after failing to get directions from the gals...
[pauses to draw breath]
... threw beer bottles at a passing freight train, woke up everybody in that little town... the usual.
I mean, aren't bachelor parties supposed to go like that?

The local cops were real nice about it when they learned that the prospective bride was the daughter of the mayor.
Did I mention it was a small town?
I think the whole police force of maybe 3 guys were there.
I got designated as driver (being less obviously drunk than the others) and we got a police escort back to our motel.

 

Bravo! Nice use of the word and proper description.

 

Cold here too!

 

I can be quite eloquent if you can get past the rampant cursing.

 

I'll take 'em both!

 

That's a good one!

Here's another story:
One time, when I was 16 - I went to the bar after work with my work buddies...
Last call was at 0200
I had to go to school the next day so I left at like 0130
I had to pull out of the bar, make a 180 degree turn and then make a left into an adjacent neighborhood
When I went to pull out of the bar, a highway patrol officer was already staged in the median, right where I had to do my 180
Cause it was almost time to shoot fish in a barrel
I was so hammered - I took a deep breath and managed to get myself safely off the main road and into the neighborhood so I could wiggle my 16 yr old ass back home..

Back then, if you got busted DUI as a minor - it was only one charge, the DUI charge..
TODAY it is the DUI charge + alcohol by a minor..

This state used to let you plead a DUI down to careless/reckless driving [if you behaved/it was your first time/nothing horrible happened]
[ask me how i know]
Now a days, they won't let you plead that shit at all - and they take your CCW permit too
No CCW for like 5yr after a DUI


and one more story:
I was at a party, drunk AF
Cops show up, tell me I gotta move my car
I am like -nope- the car wasn't in the way, it was on my friends lawn
Those fuckers just wanted me to get behind the wheel so they could arrest me
But I ain't stupid like that

 

Absolutely ... I learned to not cut grass in shorts, no matter how hot, because I embedded one of those metal pull tabs in my calf cutting the ditchline in front of my Grandma's house when I was 16 years old. That smarted pretty good.

 

You get your thermal shorts and winter crocs out

 

Erectile Dysfunction? Its a challenge....

About that, maybe a tiny bit higher.

My favorite part!!!

I once spent a comfortable night on mom's washing machine.

True story

 

Just a space heater, sweatshirt and man slippers... Don't be ridiculous