Roast my Tacoma! (2nd gen edition)

Put those in here

 

More like post it here, @CygnusX191

Tonight, on Triage My Truck “Taste,” we have the hemorrhoid raptor light edition second gen. Freud edition! (That’s the anal stage of psychosexual development.) Don’t worry, folks, it’s just what happens when you pick a shitty truck and try to *push* the styling out your ass too hard.

OMG, Lara, you sold the mobile tinting trailer? That’s rich considering we all need to tint our eyes raccoon blackout style after having to look at your lonely-ass adventuresome photos. I hope Uncle Sam whips some taste into you too. Or at least shows you how to fold the crossbars back on your rack since the Corp failed. Why are they always out?!?!? I know it’s realllllllllll tricky to click them back parallel, but (checks notes) the Army will be patient—they take literally EVERYBODY.

 

I don’t think I’ll sell it, I’m probably going to take it with me. Unless you would like to buy it.. lol

 

Okay and no, respectively. Enjoy TexAss!

 

I'm sure you bought that basic bitch wal mart soft topper to hammer some box, but no matter how hammered you are, the only hammering happening back there is on broke back mountain. Speaking of basic bitch wheels, hope your boyfriend is ok with you spending his money on those TRD faux wheels. You can lead a horse to water, but you can't deworm a guy with a squated truck. That's boring even by frat boi standards. And since you don't have any standards.... Maybe you can still buy some online.

Might even get free shipping. It is the holidays, after all.

 

Bring a hotdog to a cookout, you're gonna get skewered.

Happy to oblige

 

Possible causes for clay-colored stools include:

• Alcoholic hepatitis
  Biliary cirrhosis
• Cancer or noncancerous (benign) tumors of the liver, biliary system, or pancreas
• Cysts of the bile ducts
• Gallstones
• Some medicines
• The stool pusher’s creativity aligning with that of a skate egg case
• Narrowing of the bile ducts (biliary strictures)
• Intense self-hatred (warranted)
• Sclerosing cholangitis
• Structural problems in the biliary system that are present from birth (congenital)
• Being almost universally unf**kable
• Viral hepatitis

There may be other causes not listed here.

 

Fine, roast me

 

Dark roast. Slow pit. S&p no seasoning needed. that truck is perfect

 

Huuuuu-whut??

@CygnusX191 When did you get alien-abducted and have your baby-blues replaced with my 3rd brown eye????
That truck, an apology to actual trucks for calling it that, is no better than a glorified soccer-mom latte-fetching Pilot wanna-be, all dressed up in b-b-b-b-boring, played out 'edgy black'. Did the wittle sheep get separated from the herd of the thousands of other identical rigs- right down to the cookie-cutter wheels and pre-dimmed headlights. Those aren't the only "pre-dimmed" things going on around here!
Props to the photographer for the dangerously close-up shots of the feral beast in its natural habitat, the golf course.

 

The golf course? Thats your grandma's front yard, you uncultured swine. See the hawk tuah spit shine polish? That's a trust fund truck right there. Wouldn't know a pallet of plywood from a bag of gummy bears... the sugar free kind that make you shit out your soul and wish you were a ginger. Speaking of ginger peach fuzz, that's the best OPs gona get with the edgelord Chinese grill and patent fake morimotos. The Subaru club doesnt even allow that level of brokeback in their circle jerk meets.

At least it has a cap with tinted windows so no one has to watch you play with your mega blocks.

 

Loved how you turned Snow green

 

Haha, you really went all-in on that one – I respect the creativity. But let’s be real, even if my “feral beast” is sipping lattes and blending in with the herd, at least it’s not grazing in the scrap yard with whatever prehistoric relic you’re calling a ride. Don’t worry though – if you ever need a lift to the golf course, I’ll swing by. Just try not to get blinded by the “pre-dimmed” greatness.

 

My only point to roast on that damn fine looking truck are the Raptor Lights on the grille - and that's simply because it isn't my thing.
Why do we want our trucks to look like a Raptor? Why do we aspire to reach Ford levels of Reliability and Awesomeness?
We are BETTER than that! Toyota needs a styling element so awesome that FORD COPIES US, not the other way around.

I would love to see Ford Forums filling up with posts about people saying "LOOK! I finally got around to the Tacoma Lights Mod! Now people at the mall will think I can drive effortlessly off road and get 400k miles on this truck before it is good and broken in."

So from the cheap seats (and again that rig is gorgeous) the only thing I can see is that you wanted to enter the little-wee-wee-club with all the other Raptor Drivers by putting their Ford Poser lights on your grill. Sorry - That's all the roasting I can do because I'm slightly envious of how absolutely amazing that truck came out.

 

Ah yes, the ole' mis-match 2-tone, beaten cur that is my preeeee-cious- 'tis ugly, and getting uglier!
But I would be honored to come tour your golf course, anytime


If only to shield the hapless drivers behind you from the heinousness that's leading the clown parade

 

At least his cap matches his truck

 

Ah, but you see, my rolling masterpiece isn’t just ugly—it’s artfully ugly. The kind that makes onlookers question their life choices and reconsider their aesthetic standards. A true public service, really.


Consider my invitation not just a tour of the golf course, but a rare exhibit of avant-garde vehicular design. You’ll want to bring sunglasses… not for the sun, but to soften the visual blow of pure automotive audacity.