OK, SO HAS ANYONE ELSES 3YEAR OLD. . .

I see some going like this. kid falls on play ground. stop crying you little baby. (maybe a few bad words thrown in at some age)

and stop crying be a man.

 

you kid sounds like he's gonna take life by the balls. buahaha

 

I just spit all over my computer screen. . . .thanks. . .

luckily mine doesn't play with his nipples, he prefers to scratch his butt, and then, (only in public) ask me if its "not okay to scratch my butt?" always with that smirk on his face that he knows is going to make me laugh, so all the other wall-mart shoppers wonder what kind of parent I am

 

demanded you play the "big kitty song" (our aptly named cat) because black betty was on the radio once and you re-sung it something like,

"wahoe big kitty, bam-ba-dam
wahoe big kitty, bam-ba-dam
hes a big-fat kitty, bam-ba-dam
and hes sittin' so pretty, bam-ba-dam

 

Subbed... This is entertaining... Haha

 

lol but beware the booty babys. . . . it happens

 

working here the last two summers has been better than birth control. haha

"UNCLE CODY UNCLE CODY!!"

"..yes?"

"J SWORE!"
"J SWORE!!"

"okay, lemme go talk to J"



"Hey J, they said you swore"
*pouty face
"What did you say, J?"

"I said 'i swear if you try taking my cheetos ill tell on you'"

"oh."







two kids were eating lunch across from me
one took out a fruit rollup from his lunchbox
other kid started reaching for it

FRU owner screams "IF YOU TOUCH IT
NO FWENDSHIP. ME OR FWUIT WOWUP"

other kid backed down
then that kid pulled out a stick of string cheese


they argued for 15 minutes about who liked cheese more
One claimed to have eaten one hundred fifty million pounds of "mosserla" once, and the other got fat eating the moon

 

This is why I am glad I am single and no girls are after me since I don't want kids at all right and I would rather have my money going up in my bank account not being drained for toys and fixing their mistakes

 

No kids here, but my niece on my wife's side was famous for asking every guy my wife dated if he was going to give her a baby cousin..haha.

 

Our one year old walked up to a stranger in lowes and proclaimed "YOLOOOOO!"

At least she knows the meaning I guess

 

so does that mean you are now responsible for such baby cousing?

 

lol awesoooooooooooooome

 

Lol none of the above, we taught her how to say it cause we thought it'd be funny. Turns out we were right.

Also, I don't believe I've ever heard the song that comes from. Most of my music involves banjos in some shape or another haha

 

My wife and I were in Walmart yesterday with my 2 year old. He wanted to walk and hold my hand instead if riding in the buggy. Naturally we were walking a little slow and my wife was behind us. All of a sudden my son broke free and was holding on to my wife's leg yelling "it's scary, it's scary!" I turn around and there is a 250+ pound black lady wearing yoga pants and a tiny tank top intended for a girl half her size and it was not long enough.

 

Mine are 5 & 8 now, but when my son was three he had a difficult time with the pronunciation of the letter "T". It came out sounding like "F".

Driving home:
"Mommy! Daddy! look itsa big red fire fuck!"

Playing:
"I cant find my mater fuck Daddy"

Got a few looks when that happened in public.

 

wrestlin with my youngest brother


he sticks his head up my shorts, I tell him to quit bein weird and get his head outta there

he yells theres stuff in here, (me and my dad silently laugh)

tell him again to stop, he grabs my cellphone from inside my shorts and yells your stuffs hard too!

me and my dad lose it laughing

 

Ok, just to give you an idea of a normal day. Usually when she gets hurt, she comes to me crying or whining pointing at the wounded part so I can kiss it to make it better. This morning she come to me whining and showing me her finger, to which I compassionately grab and start kissing and telling her is going to be alright. She looks at me with a WTF face and says " no daddy, smell my finger. I scratched my butt and now is stinky; I need a wipey!".

 

Thanksgiving dinner at my sister's.
Out of the blue, 4 y/o nephew blurts out:

"You know where I got my baaaalllls?"
(nervous looks all around the table, especially from his teenage sisters)
"At the ball store!"