Relocation and "Life Shakeup" : Things you notice in your new location (really long)

A couple of weeks ago, the shit hit the fan in pretty colossal fashion for me. Not to drag it out, I lost my job, my marriage, and most of what I owned.

Then, on my way cross country to start over, I caught a semi tire (no, not a scrap of recap, the whole fucking thing, rim and all) under the front end at 80 while crossing northern Louisiana. Shoved the radiator into the fan, and the two of them back into the motor.

Then, while she's on the flatbed heading for the repair shop, the topper catches the wind wrong and goes airborne. Did I mention it was pouring ass rain at the time? Everything I own, currently in the back of the truck, is flooded.

Betty is no more. I now own a computer, a few bags of clothes, a few football momentos that were fortunately wrapped tightly, my tools, my chef's knife, and a couple milk crates of assorted computer parts. And that's it.

*pours one out

But this isn't a woe is me thing. My life went to shit but I'll start anew.

So, I'm at my new home in the burbs of Oklahoma City. And, this thread is a discussion about relocation, and what goofy shit you notice.

Here's some things I found about living halfway across the country.

* I'd forgotten how nice it was living in the EST time zone. I knew when everything was. Now I don't. I can't tell you how many things I've missed in some fashion in the last couple weeks forgetting when it says "Tune in at 8!" it means 7 for me now. It don't matter that I grew up in CST...I've been in EST for 17 years. Yeek.

* I'd also forgotten what it's like to live among a population where the majority are working folks and rednecks. Well, in Wisconsin we had hicks more than rednecks, but you get the idea. I heard a guy sneeze in the grocery store today an aisle over and heard three different people say 'bless you' or 'ghezundheit' or something. Fucking people are *nice* here. I didn't realize how much I missed that.

* If Faces of Meth wanted to film a TV series, they could make season one here in OKC. Good lord.

* It's been a long time since I lived some place where bib overalls were considered an acceptable piece of 'going out' attire. By themselves. Which is NOT good when your height starts with a 5, your weight with a number 3 or greater, and the number of days since you last bathed is also a number 3 or greater. Please note it was not a single occurrence of this that I have seen....it's actually not uncommon. And gag-inducing. "Stank" is a good starting point to convey it.

* There are classic hot rods and muscle cars EVERYwhere here. And the old motorhead in me is a very happy man to see it. Yes, lots of them are in the process of being very poorly restored, but seeing a '73 Comet, a 65 Fairlaine, a 55 Bel Aire, a (what I think was a ) late 50s G10 pickup, a 78 Nova 396, an honest to god Grand National (not a rebadged Regal Begal, a real one), and a roughly 52 Merc roadster while walking 15 minutes to the store today (and that's just parked in driveways). This is classics country, and I am LOVING it.

* I live right by an active Air Force Base. I have two words for you....PLANE PORN. My god. The show I get every day here in the sky nearly makes me hard. It's glorious!

* Crom's bones, I don't think I've ever seen this many churches. The hyperconservative derp is strong here. I actually overheard someone refer to 'That Kenyan' when talking about Obama in the store, and the guy he was talking to in line agreed. Yikes. FFS, that's the sitting President, show some respect. You had a conniption if anyone looked crosswise at Bush after 9/11, how about returning the favor.

* Prices are WIERD here. I don't get it. This is the middle of oil country and farm country. Gas is cheap ($2.99 for regular unleaded down the street right now). A rotissere roast chicken at the grocery store is $9.99, and the cheap frozen veggies (store brand) are $1.79. To compare, look at gas prices where you live right now. In FL where I was as of late, roast chickens at the deli were $5.99, sometimes $6.99, and the frozen veg were permanently 10 for $10 at Winn Dixie.

* But housing is relatively cheap. Duh, I guess. My buddy pays like 500$ for this 3 bed we're in now, with city sewer/water, cheap as hell power, and a decent sized fully fenced yard. Three minutes from the interstate.

* Pickup trucks are a way of life here. It's nice, even if a lot of them are shitty Dodges and Chevys. Pickups and mods are everywhere here. Sadly, like the prices I was talking about above, Tacos are pricey as hell here. You won't get in a Taco will less than mid 6 figure mileage for under 20K, period. But I'll get another, I vow it...just might have to look a bit, is all.

* Orange-red mud is ... odd, at first. Remember that classic Beverly Hills Cop, where the good guy old cop has the red mud on his shoes from running by the oil fields? The second movie, I think...bright orange. Might as well be day-glo neon. On many cars. You can see that shit half a mile away. And it's STICKY. Something to get used to.

* I don't miss the sub-tropical heat and humidity. Or the freakishly oversized insect population. But here....CRICKETS. Goddamnit, I was really liking not having to listen to those bastards.

* I also don't miss the third-world infrastructure. FPL was the power company there....many of us referred to them as "Flickering Power and Lights". Yea, they were pretty bad.

* I don't miss Hurricane Season. I now have Tornado Season. *sigh*

* I don't know if Oklahoma has a weight problem, or if just OKC has a weight problem. But holy shit, the fat rolls are out in force here. I mean, DAMN. See above commentary about bib overalls and nothing else.

* Its really, really odd 'having an accent' now. People ask me where I'm from. I don't sound southern. I don't sound midwest-twangey like my folks back in Wisconsin do. I apparently sound 'flat', according to a couple folks I've chatted with lately, and they can't place me anywhere by it, so they ask. Odd.

EDITED to add: Cant' believe I forgot this one:

* One of the upsides to Florida is you can get some of the best seafood (or anything, really, thanks to all of the ports, from anywhere in the world) really quickly and at high quality. I so miss the fresh seafood from there. And here what there is, is expensive as shit.

So, what took YOU by surprise when you moved/relocated a ways last? Hopefully yours was under more pleasant circumstances than mine. But relocations are funny, I'm finding, and I'm curious how y'all have been treated by yours.

 

Well, Xaks, sorry to hear about your misfortune with the divorce and losing your truck and everything else. I know your post is a little old, but I am sure you are still working through the difficulties of it. I wish you all of the best.

To answer your question about what took me by surprise when I relocated:
I moved to the US from South Africa in 1997. My wife and I came here, 27 years old, with 2 suit cases each and $2000.
Everything was new - starting with driving on the wrong side of the road.
It is unbelievable how used we get to doing things. Even simple everyday tasks like buying groceries - all the brand names are different, you don't know what is good and what not.
I had (still have) a strong Afrikaans (Dutch) accent, so trying to communicate was (and still is sometimes) a struggle. Fortunately I found that most people were very friendly and welcomed us with open arms.
Coming from a very arid area the Florida heat & humidity, and lack of winter was also something to get used to.
One thing that was great (not anymore) was the gas prices. Gas was around $1/gal in 1997. I remember driving from Daytona Beach to Atlanta for $12 - we had a Honda Civic that ran on fumes in addition to the great gas prices.
Well there are a lot more good and bad memories, but these are some of the first that comes to mind.

 

I moved from maine to texas in april of 2013. a few of the things that changed for me are

the people were/ are very welcoming of a person from away
food, gas are cheaper
electricity, cell phone way more expensive
wages are higher
I MISS the rain, and having water nearby. its now 70 miles to go boating
everything has thorns, bites, or is poisonous
the majority of women are all packing a spare tire. glad I brought my woman with me.

i'm sure theres more but those are the big ones

 

That's the kind of stuff i want to experience. Sadly, i can't afford to do it alone, and no one wants to go with me. Been stuck in NJ for 28 years.