4 wheel drive issues 2003 tacoma 3.4 v6 sr5 trd

Oki know this is a long shot but im hoping you guys will see this thread... i have a 2003 tacoma SR5 TRD 3.4 v6. My 4 wheel drive stopped working. When i attempt to depress the 4x4 button in the cab on the transfer case selector which is a manual 2hi-4hi and 4low transfer case shifter with a push button 4 wheel drive button on the side of the knob... nothing happens... the transfer case nor the front diff move... So here is what ive attempted to fix thus far... first off it is not a vacuume system it is fully electric there are vent lines that come out of the actuators but are not controlled by vacuume. So its not a vacuume issue. I first attempted to replace the transfer case "switch"/position sensor... that did nothing same issue... i purchased a front diff actuator installed itand the old diff actuator was stuck in 4wd so i slid the gear back and set the new actuator to 2wd... sameissue.. nothing happens. I disconnected the plug offof the front actuator and pushed the 4x4 button andthe transfer case actuator placed the transfer case in to 4wd! By using pin 1 and 5 on the front actuator iplaced the differential into 4wd so the actuator works... i reversed polarity and placed it back into 2wd and depressed the switch the transfer case went bavk.into 2hi... i know its electrical but is there a relayin my 4wd system of is it all in the 4wd computer can i purchase a new pigtail dor the 6 pin connector? I cannot find one similar to mine anywhere.in a junkyard near me i was hoping somebody has hadthis same issue...