50+ thread

7 hours of my life gone, fighting with stupid lawn mower tires. If there's ever a next time, I'll just pay someone to do the deed. I did figure out (the hard way) that the tires mount easier from the back side ( spindle side). I have no idea why.

 

hey all.

this has been one extreme stressing thing after another ..... first she wouldnt talk to any of us & tried to escape the place.... then she called & told us it was all our fault.... then she called & said she loved & forgave us for causing her to injure herself & that she would hold no animosity towards us for her now broken body.

next she hung up on us & cut us off again.

then we got her moved to an inpatient treatment place for a bit to try & find the real diagnosis & treatment plan. In the transfer? she somehow got put back in charge of her care & cut all of us off & out. so now we know nothing. they did tell me to come up there on Monday morning & that if they had a new DR appointed for her & he had reviewed it all that we might be restored decision making.

its been heartbreaking & absolutely soul crushing to see the woman i love so dearly just lash out & cheese grater all of us. Then threatening to divorce me the second she ever gets out.... again cause this is all my fault.

fuk im just so overloaded by all this. it would have been much easier if she had just killed me instead.

only bright spot is that her family has rallied around me & our kids have been rockstars of support to me. They are very unhappy with her & feel that she is knowingly using my submissive nature to her against me.

ugh.

my own family & close friends are also solid in any help they can give. but really im trying to keep this so small & not embarrass or humiliate my wonderful wife.

its just an extra eyepoke that she has no such consideration for me/us.

life goes on & my bulldogs still love me.

 

@sdk1968 - she’s not well. Use the hospital’s resources and even use the Probate Court if you have to in order to get control of her decision making. No, no, no you’re not better off if she killed you. Whatever life brings you, you’re better off being here for you and your kids and family.

Keep posting. We’re all here for you.

 

Good to hear you open up, it will help you.

She has a chemical imbalance, that is all. Her words and actions are a result of that and should be ignored until it is corrected

 

It’s good that you have some support from family and friends, you’re in a tough spot and need the help. There should be some local professional support you could look into. Remember, you can always talk / vent / rant about it on here.

 

The cabin up the road from ours just went Vrbo. So far so good, but it makes us nervous. It was vacant for years and then got redone by this great Lithuanian couple who have been our neighbors for 5 years. Now it’s different people every weekend.

 

Good morning

I hope everyone has a peaceful Sunday.

@sdk1968 Hang in there. I’m glad you have the support of your kids and her family. Good thoughts to you.

 

Morning everyone I think I’ll go for a walk, watch the sunrise

 

Prayers going out for out for you on this Sunday.

 

Mornin’

 

Good morning everyone. It looks like this will be the last cool day, then the doors to Hades opens up by mid-week.

@sdk1968 , hang in there. This is not your fault but you get to pick up the pieces and try to put it back together. Its good to hear that everyone else related to you is on your side and is providing support.

I hope that the Dr's can get it figured out quickly so that everyone can start healing.

 

Good Morning

 

Good morning. June 1st

 

Good morning everybody

 

Hang in there buddy. It’s going to be a rough ride for a while but it will get better. It’s great that the families are supportive of you, that will help get past this. Remember, all the mean things that are said are because of a chemical imbalance not how she really feels.

 

Morning all

 

Morning. Stay Well…Stay Safe

 

thanks everybody.

im not sure if maybe some of the things she is spraying are maybe true & ive been too love blind all these years to know. my kids are furious with how she has talked when she called.

speaking of;

she called just a bit ago. started out nice.... love you miss you come see me today at 230pm for visiting hour. of course i agreed & getting ready to head out on the 2hr drive.
but it wasnt 30 seconds into this conversation she was throwing out demands & really aggressive.

bring my CC's, DL, ID, debit card, dress & so on.

told her i wasnt sure if they would let me do those things. she said: you will fkn do it & you will do it because i said so or you wont see me.
now she already tried to escape the other place so i dont think giving a flight risk patient CC's, DL, Debit cards is a good thing. especially since she has an uncontrollable spending issue on top of the flight risk thing.

but i did tell her i would be there & will. also asked if she was gonna actually see me when i got there or just demand her stuff. she said "you will have to go on blind faith, you put me here"

and with that she hung up.

now ive got a letter/sd card to give the nurses to give to her doctor because im still locked out of her care again.... it has her phone txts, emails & blog posts about suicide attempts & the paranoid delusions.
hoping this will get the family restored to her care.

totally feel like she is playing me here to just set herself up for another escape attempt.

thats the update. gotta go get in the truck.

thanks to you all for being here. im a very private & solitary person other than for her, so this is huge. it also gives me a good reference point for when my mind cant process all of this.

sk

 

You have to do what is right, overall. Not what she wants at the moment especially for an alternative motive. You got this.

 

@sdk1968 sending love, positive thoughts and energy your way. Stay strong brother it's just her chemical imbalances talking. You got this and we got your back.