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anyone struggle with coming home

Discussion in 'Military' started by mpgnc64, Dec 15, 2009.

  1. Dec 15, 2009 at 4:02 AM
    #1
    mpgnc64

    mpgnc64 [OP] Well-Known Member

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    Mike and Denise
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    Just wondering and it may help some young guys here
     
  2. Dec 15, 2009 at 4:59 AM
    #2
    bakerla

    bakerla Man, Myth, Legend

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    Some people struggle with getting out of the military and some people struggle with returning from a combat / deployed environment. As an Army reservist, I struggled with both.

    After an 18 month tour, my biggest struggle was dealing with civilians and being a civilian again. Public places made me anxious. Stupid people with their little problems pissed me off. I'm well over that now. Time, going back to college and the gym helped.
     
  3. Dec 15, 2009 at 8:53 AM
    #3
    Notty

    Notty Well-Known Member

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    Yes. I had some major adjustment problems being back in the States and not feeling normal. I still have major sleep problems and anger issues too related to PTSD that are very hard for my Wife to deal with. I am still not sure how she does deal with me at times. After 14 months in Middle East and being a part of the invasion in '03, there are things I still cannot forget I did or saw. The Army felt it was bad enough to MedBoard me and the VA now gives me really good compensation for it. However, I would gladly trade the money to feel "normal" again.
     
  4. Dec 31, 2009 at 2:56 PM
    #4
    mpgnc64

    mpgnc64 [OP] Well-Known Member

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    Well we just keep our heads up and press on I guess
     
  5. Jan 3, 2010 at 4:29 PM
    #5
    SOSHeloPilot

    SOSHeloPilot Well-Known Member

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    .

    I have PTSD from RVN but was not diagnosed until years later.

    Was banged up and lost 2 aircraft. Had a small disability from physical injuries, when I got out.

    Disability rating was raised to full retirement disability a few years ago and the PTSD was added to the disability list.

    When I can, I try to help veterans (as a volunteer) try to get their compensation and any medical care that is due them.

    .
     
  6. Jan 8, 2010 at 6:56 PM
    #6
    NorthXNorthwest

    NorthXNorthwest Well-Known Member

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    Coming home is no joke. Really a lot of mixed emotions, unreasonable expectations all around. Ive already been through that all before. I am expecting this second round to go much smoother. If anyone out there needs some advise or someone to just talk to, Ill be here for you brother.
     
  7. Jan 8, 2010 at 7:17 PM
    #7
    The End

    The End Support our troops!

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    You realize how pathetic everyone is and how much they bitch. That was the hardest thing for me, listening to how horrible everybody's life is. I just tell 'em "At least you're not in a foxhole dodging bullets." Shuts them up most of the time.
     
  8. Jan 8, 2010 at 7:20 PM
    #8
    bakerla

    bakerla Man, Myth, Legend

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    x2
     
  9. Jan 8, 2010 at 7:28 PM
    #9
    SOSHeloPilot

    SOSHeloPilot Well-Known Member

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    .

    A suggestion for those with (what may be) difficulties of PTSD.

    I have been working with veterans & veterans groups (as an unpaid volunteer) and with VA as a guinea pig for 12 years on PTSD.

    Before that, I was in private therapy for 10+ years with PTSD.

    If you are having a problem, go to the VA and get some counseling and have this documented in you medical records.

    If you are on active duty, make sure that the info gets in your SMRs.

    .
     
  10. Jan 9, 2010 at 1:13 AM
    #10
    Krazie Sj

    Krazie Sj Resident Jackass

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    At the same time though, you chose that. Suck it up and quit bitching would be my response to that.

    A little understanding from both sides goes a long way. :eek:
     
  11. Jan 10, 2010 at 5:28 PM
    #11
    NorthXNorthwest

    NorthXNorthwest Well-Known Member

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    The issue here is that if you never been through the suck, you have NO IDEA whats its like. No one chooses to get shot at or blown up, those things just happen and it happens to happen more to the people who have served in the Armed Forces of the United states. You know, the type of people, most of whom have a insignia representing their branch of service under their avatar. ;)
     
  12. Jan 10, 2010 at 5:32 PM
    #12
    cantspele

    cantspele Member

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  13. Jan 10, 2010 at 5:38 PM
    #13
    xodeuce

    xodeuce mmmmmmbourbon.

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    Firstly, I'm a civilian who has no idea at all the emotional and physical stress that goes along with the service our armed services personnel provide. I have a close friend who works for notalone.com and I don't know if it's a website that you would be interested in or not.

    With utmost humilty, thank you all for your service.
     
  14. Jan 10, 2010 at 5:49 PM
    #14
    derekp

    derekp giddy up!

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    Coming home is tough. Period. You have learned a complete new way of life, for most it is called survival. You family learned a new way of life as well, don't forget that. Deployments impact every facet of your life.
    Here are a few resources for the Service Member ( http://www.centerforthestudyoftraumaticstress.org/resources/category-19_service_members ) and
    some for the Family Member ( http://www.centerforthestudyoftraumaticstress.org/resources/category-4_families ).
    There are even resources for children. ( http://www.centerforthestudyoftraumaticstress.org/resources/category-2_children )
    List of other resources - http://www.centerforthestudyoftraumaticstress.org/resources/categorylisting.php

    These come from the website http://www.centerforthestudyoftraumaticstress.org/ . We are attached to the Uniformed Services University in Bethesda, MD; it is basically the medical school for the military. I just PCS'd there in late Sept.

    If you are still Active Duty, there are resources on base that can help you readjust. Try the Chaplain, Family Services (or what ever the name of that is now, such as Airman and Family Readiness for the USAF) and even Mental Health/Behavioral Health. Please use them. Don't worry about stigma, we take confidentiality very serious. If you are no longer Active Duty, ask around at the local VA. There are resources to help. Our veterans are a treasured resource that we need to take care of, and we will if we know folks need us. The main thing to remember is that y'all aren't alone. We have many others that struggle in the transition. I would say that everyone has a struggle. Some are just tougher than others. If you feel that you are having a tough time with it, please step up and ask for help. The resources are there.

    Hope this helps.

    Derek P
    Germantown, MD
     
  15. Jan 12, 2010 at 9:52 AM
    #15
    derekp

    derekp giddy up!

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  16. Jan 14, 2010 at 3:39 AM
    #16
    Tadcaster

    Tadcaster Dogs n Trucks

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    I'll echo the comments about how petty civilian concerns seem when you come home. I've also been bothered by the self-centeredness I see around me, the focus on "what's good for me" vs "what are the needs of the team."

    At the same time, if you react to that you risk the chance, over time, of driving a wedge between you and your non-serving countrymen. And that road leads to alienation and bitterness.

    We are all shaped by our experiences. Having been in combat, I honestly can't say it's something I wish all could experience. I don't wish that on anybody, though feel a deep bond of brotherhood with those who've been there.

    As others have said, talking helps. Just don't keep it all bottled up inside.

    Pete
    Retired Chief Warrant Officer of Marines
     
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