ASSHOLE PARKING

I don’t think you’re going to Costco for a 32 ounce jug of mayonnaise and a 65 inch TV, but who am I to judge.

 

Is that a super cheap version of a Carolina squat?

 

Which plate?

 

where did you get the stickers??
so I can get some

 

$6 Knock Knock Nifty Note Pad, Parking Citation

https://www.amazon.com/dp/1601064675

 

Former coworker of mine used to talk about why he liked to vacation in Hawaii.

"Everyone speaks English and drives on the right. I get off the plane, pick up my rental car, drive to Costco to get food and beer, drive to my condo to unpack then drive to the beach and relax."

 

These are the ones I have, trust me they work as designed, you need a chipping hammer, industrial strength MEK, a box of razors and a blowtorch to get these sons of bitches off. Plus I carry a sharpie to express the exact reason they are getting a douche bag sticker on their vehicle.
I bought them for work so I could control the parking on my construction sites but then I got into trouble for it so they have been relegated to my glove box and are placed on the super special, true asshat douche nozzle parkers. Case and point, the guy 2 days ago at Lowes that felt his Mercedes deserved 2 spots sideways at the Pro door entrance for fucks sake. Sharpie lives in the bag with them.



You can purchase them here.



If you want to see the narcissists of the world lose their collective shit? Buy a pack of these bad boys and slap one on a mother fuckers window that thinks they are entitled to "special parking privileges", they always start the same, they try to peel the corners and then come to the realization that they are not getting it off with out the help of some serious cleaning and scraping.
It will make your day, I assure you.

 

this asshole parked in this red zone repeatedly, so the curb was recently red paint refreshed. Bitch don't care.

 

I mean, I get it, people can suck at parking for a lot of reasons, but what you are advocating is actually vandalism.

 

You live long enough you will see yourself become the villain.

 

Bad parking doesn't justify vandalizing someone's vehicle.

 

Shin splitter deluxe. He's a helicopter pilot, they are all this way.


This turn muffin (me) doesn't know what a carwash is, all that mud came off the two Toyotas in the photo over the past few years... But, most people don't want to park here after me so at least I get to keep my parking spot! To be fair, I live down a four-mile dirt road and when it rains, things get interesting.

 

You look through your eyes, I'll look through mine.

 

Unfortunately, vandalism isn't subjective. You are causing damage or defacing someone else's property with willful and malicious intent. Pretty cut and dry.

 

Completely agreed.

That said, I wouldn't be too upset if he was sticking them on windows/glass. Paint would suck though.

 

Yeah, glass is one thing, and I hope that's the case. Paint on the other hand, any damage to the paint would easily be over the $1000 limit in FL and the victim would be able to go after him. All-in-all, it's a pretty stupid thing to be doing.

 

Clearly you haven’t been to Hawaii where they are so lazy they just drive around and roll on parking tickets onto your windshield so they don’t even have to get out—and they are a bitch to remove.

 

It's even worse when the vehicle owner is peeling them of their window inside the impound yard.

 

If that is a curb cut for a crosswalk/handicapped access, this person is a complete cactus twat and should be towed with aplomb