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Best Dealership Salesman Quote You've Personally Heard

Discussion in 'Off-Topic Discussion' started by BuzzardsGottaEat, Feb 28, 2013.

  1. Feb 28, 2013 at 7:02 PM
    #1
    BuzzardsGottaEat

    BuzzardsGottaEat [OP] "Pick up some speed.. You'll make it."

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    My buddy is researching Tacomas and may get his first truck soon. We were discussing why he shouldn't bother listening to salesmen on some things and I remembered a great one from when I took my first Tacoma test drive.

    I mentioned something about the auto transmission having all those juts and sideways motions being different than the older cars I was used to and he pointed to where you can move it from D to 4 and said "That's the more power option"

    Apparently you can slap it sideways when on the move and get more power out of it. Woo!

    What is your best dealership salesman quote that you have personally gotten?
     
  2. Mar 1, 2013 at 12:22 PM
    #2
    Ice Horse

    Ice Horse Fire Pony/Stalking Horse

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    3 inch Toytec Adjustable C.O.'s, 3 inch All Pro rear suspension kit, factory E-locker, Trail Gear sliders and front stinger bumper, CBI Offroad rear tube bumper, XRC8 Winch, 33 inch BFG KM2's, 16 inch Ivan Stewart Wheels, Cobra CB radio, flip up license plate, white tail lights, LED front signals, Tundra front brake upgrade, new radio, rock lights, sub woofer, remote start, satoshi grille with prius emblem
    My favorite is when vehicles are still filthy inside and out. Then here comes the "if you buy it we'll clean it for you."

    If you're too lazy to get out soda cans and crap then no.

    Or how salesmen never know answers without having to look at the sheet on the window or go back inside. You don't have that many models, you stand around most of the day, why not learn your product? I'm perfectly capable of reading a sheet.
     
  3. Mar 1, 2013 at 12:26 PM
    #3
    Justus

    Justus resident Apple Pie Monster

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    Paso Robles
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    not so low, not so slow 2006 6 lug
    stockish
    Me: "whats so special about this baja?" -played dumb


    sales guy "see that field and hill (it was a pretty nice area)...lets go for a ride"

    I like my setup better....I wasnt impressed with the high speed uneven dirt road ride of the baja honestly.
     
    Last edited: Mar 1, 2013
  4. Mar 1, 2013 at 12:28 PM
    #4
    tacomataco2

    tacomataco2 Well-Known Member

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    It's got power steering!
     
  5. Mar 1, 2013 at 12:32 PM
    #5
    jtav2002

    jtav2002 Kenny Fuckin Powers

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    Reading, PA
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    I almost feel bad for salesman. I've always gone in knowing more than they do. I've done all my research their job is to only give me a number we are both satisfied with and fill out the paper work.

    I've never gotten any really ridiculous lines but I do remember back in 2007 or so I was looking at a new 4Runner. It was an SR5 package V6 model. Salesman came out and was like oh I see you're looking at a V6 car you must like to go fast. I'm like well its the standard engine option if I wanted more power I'd look at the V8 bit if I wanted something to go fast in I wouldn't be looking at a 4Runner at all.
     
  6. Mar 1, 2013 at 12:33 PM
    #6
    Ahshiet

    Ahshiet Well-Known Member

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    Set #1 16x10 ion alloy wheel 31x12.5 super swampers Set#2 17x9 KMC Diesel black 305/65/17 M/T ATZ baja Set#3 TRD offroad wheels painted wrinkle black with H/T tire 275/70/16 Set#4 Weld racing 16x12 Typhoon with 305/70/16 BF KO tires Set#5 Weld racing 16.5x12 36x16 fun country Set#6 TRD rugged edition wheels 305/75/16 baja claws Set#7 16x10 procomp steel "beadlooks" 33x12.50 TSL Boggers Spider track spacers in front Wet Okole black seat covers fronts with pockets,back and armrest HIDs high Lexus projector fogs h11 hid 3500k Toyota bed mat black trd exhaust Fujita intake black Xrunner badges carbon fiber door sills Alpine double din 2 8" bazookas (modded) 2 Alpine type-r 8's in tubes Rockford fosgate 1500w silverstar blinker bulbs front and back Led lic plate bulbs Led dome light Led map lights Black eBay headlights VHT night shade tails and 3rd brake light Custom made rear fog lights(next to 3rd brake light) Sticker bombed bed walls and pass. A-pill
    Me:you guys have any 4x4 trd sports in stock

    SM:not at the moment but you don't need it you live on an island not much places you'll need 4x4(showing me a prerunner sport)if you get stuck you can just push this button "TCS" locks the rear diff!


    FAIL!
     
  7. Mar 1, 2013 at 12:34 PM
    #7
    crazyengineer

    crazyengineer Well-Known Member

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  8. Mar 1, 2013 at 12:45 PM
    #8
    Razgriz

    Razgriz wtf am i reading

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    Not from the sales man but this was when i was signing for it with my friend.

    Friend: Yeah i know the sales guy. I went to high school with him
    Financing guy or what ever they are called: Oh really. How was that?
    Friend: We use to beat him up.
    Financing guy: *poker face*
     
  9. Mar 1, 2013 at 12:46 PM
    #9
    Bennett707

    Bennett707 Yeti Hunter

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    When my dad was looking at F350.

    "If you buy it today I will buy your gas for a year."
     
  10. Mar 1, 2013 at 12:51 PM
    #10
    CNEDEER

    CNEDEER If ya ain't first, your last!

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    Well this should be interesting, given that I currently work at a dealership

    :cool:
     
  11. Mar 1, 2013 at 12:55 PM
    #11
    Monster Coma

    Monster Coma Well-Known Member

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    It's a wagon
    "We can't get the Tacoma in manual, they don't make them that way" this was when I was buying my 12..
     
  12. Mar 1, 2013 at 1:19 PM
    #12
    Pliny

    Pliny Offline

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    I got the same line at a dealership when I was considering buying a new one: "They don't make the 4x4 trd in a manual"

    I swung by a different dealership to look at a certified truck, but it sold that day, so the sales-woman tried to sell me on a baja 6 speed.

    The convo went something like this:
    "Sorry, it looks like that truck sold, but we have this nice baja edition 4x4 access cab, like you wanted"
    "I can't afford to spend 35K on a new truck, the used one in the lower 20s is my upper limit"
    "You don't have anyone who could help you out?
    "No, and (playing dumb), why would I want a baja edition anyways?"
    "It has upgraded suspension and upgraded wheels"
    "That's one hell of an expensive 5100 lift. Are those beadlocks?"
    "Yes, they are custom beadlock rims" :cool:
    I smiled and said I didn't want a 6 speed anyways - too many people have TO bearing issues and the rev hang drives me nuts.
    "Thats just from people who don't know how to drive a stick"

    You gotta love the stealerships sometimes. I get that they're just trying to make their comission, but comeon! Don't try to upsell a guy looking at a used truck in the lower 20s to a 35k baja edition and BS the details!
     
  13. Mar 1, 2013 at 1:22 PM
    #13
    4Wheelin4Banger

    4Wheelin4Banger Longtime Toyman

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    Worst:
    When buying my '11 Taco from the only one of three dealerships in the area that had a 4x4 2.7 5 speed AC that I saw online & went to them. "we can't find it why don't you go inside while we look for it". 45 min later "we found another one" than he showed me an automatic. Another 45 min later "we found it".
    Best:
    When buying the wife's Volvo S60 T5. He knew what the car could do & how to sell it. "How fast are you going?" I told him 45 "Get it up to 55, don't touch the brakes give it some gas in the turn and get on the on ramp" I did it and before I got to the end of the on ramp I looked down and I was doing over 100MPH.
     
  14. Mar 1, 2013 at 1:29 PM
    #14
    BEEFY_CHEESY_TACO

    BEEFY_CHEESY_TACO DUDE MAN BRO

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    Hot Carl!!!
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    When I was looking at my Tacoma the salesman referred to the rear locker button as the "drag race/burn out mode" and the traction control button as the "donut" button, like he was selling it to a teenager.....
     
  15. Mar 1, 2013 at 1:34 PM
    #15
    Rupp1

    Rupp1 Well-Known Member

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    Let me say this:

    As an ex-salesman, (for a short period of time anyways) I can say that we were extensively trained in people and how to get them to part with their money, while we received almost NO training on the vehicles we were supposed to sell.

    You could call Bullshit on almost any "quote" from a dealer regarding a car or truck. ;)
     
  16. Mar 1, 2013 at 1:44 PM
    #16
    docbrown

    docbrown Well-Known Member

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    Looking at a Chevy S-10 about 25 years ago:

    Salesman: "It's got a V-6, so it has lots of power"
    Me (looking under the hood): "It's a 4 cylinder"
    Salesman: "Nope, it's got a V-6"
    Me: "Look, there are only 4 spark plugs, it's a 4 cylinder"
    Salesman: "I'm pretty sure that's a V-6"
    Me: "you have a nice evening"
     
  17. Mar 1, 2013 at 1:47 PM
    #17
    03DBLCABTACO

    03DBLCABTACO Well-Known Member

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    At a chevy dealer in 94. This new body style Camaro is front wheel drive. I said have a nice day and bought from another dealer.
     
  18. Mar 1, 2013 at 1:49 PM
    #18
    Ice Horse

    Ice Horse Fire Pony/Stalking Horse

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    I always get raped if I ever drive mine into the dealer to pick up parts or something. First gens don't sit on the lot long.
     
  19. Mar 1, 2013 at 2:12 PM
    #19
    isu2014

    isu2014 RAT Products

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    View the build. Too much to list.
    When the ford raptor came out, we saw it at an auto show and the sales people were talking it up hardcore... "This truck will make any off road vehicle look stupid out on the trails."
     
  20. Mar 1, 2013 at 5:40 PM
    #20
    Ryan DCFS

    Ryan DCFS New guy

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    From a BMW salesman while I was test driving a 335i on an empty (completely empty - private) straight road, from a stop...

    Dealer: "Step on it, get to about 75-80."

    Me: "okay..."

    *...At 80...*

    Dealer: "OK, I want you to try and snap off the brake pedal."

    Me: "...what..?"

    Dealer: "Slam on the brakes as hard as you can, don't let up... if you can snap the brake pedal off, I will give you the car."

    I tried to put the pedal into the ground... The nose of the car didn't even dip, not a hint of ABS or skidding... It just stopped... Once I came to a stop...

    Dealer: "You let off, didn't you..." With a shit-eating grin.
     
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